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Poll
The game of the week is for you the viewer to pick! Who will win
Ottowa
45%
 45%  [ 9 ]
Wife beaters
55%
 55%  [ 11 ]
Total Votes : 20


Waagh



Joined: Apr 13, 2019

Post   Posted: Nov 15, 2019 - 16:12 Reply with quote Back to top

JIM: Welcome back sports fans to the CBFL on CBS.

OWIE: Thats right Jim the only weeklyish sports blood bowl broadcast on the Fummbl Forums. week two in the CBFL is already under way and boy what a week this is shaping up to be.

JIM: exciting matchups for sure. the U-sports division is already into week 3! those eager beavers are moving right along while the so called main divisions are still stuck entirely in week 1!

OWIE: You know how I hate to say anything nice about U-Sports but it is true. With the inclusion of new, to CBFL, coach and dictator of the league Garcangel and his 2-0 crybabies led by team captain Waagh, this division is shaping up to be more exciting than last year. Which isn't saying much.veteran coach and Cheater Charlie finnaly found a way to win after 3 games with his Steamers. Menwhile the horde and anglias are still looking for their first wins of the seasn which brings us to the only U-Sports game left this week as the coldbloods go up against the anglias.

JIM: I have to tell you i like the coldbloods in this one Owie. that Lizardman roster is a real power gamer option that NuffinNuffle has taken advantage of and I can't imagine who would have turned him onto such a cheap way of playing the game.

OWIE: Like it even matters Jim. Still I am taking the Crybabies and the Coldbloods as my playoff teas this year Jim.

The main divisions of CBLF are a little less clear cut. All coaches but Tzalaran's Clawyouits have gone with more speed and agility this season. Two games in round one had to be forfeited because of scheduling conflicts and our fearless leader and true man in charge asserted his dominance over antithisisoftime by forfeiting her first game of the season. normally Anti is a "play your game on time or else" kind of administrator so it is good to see her be held to her own standard.

JIM: well enough giving Anti the business Lets give Baza the business some too as he had to drop out of the league because of "illness".

OWIE: That's right Jim. Baza apparently got very drunk at a frat mixer and kissed too many randos because now he has the mono and can no longer continue for the season.

JIM: Isn't he a little old to be attending frat mixers?

OWIE: That never stopped you Jim. Anyway, lets get on with this weeks CBFL main divisions match ups.

First the nose rubbers v the small lizzies. the lizzies destroyed the rapscallions last week who were expertly coached by MY FRIEND Arcyan so, I look for them to begin a win streak here against the rubbers.

The Seekers are up against the straw hats. they were supposed to play yesterday afternoon but it didnt get done so we will see if coach Waaghafalgah gets his chance to crush the spirits of the High elves or if Coach Anti is still Skeered.

Im afraid there is more Bad News for MY FRIEND Arcyan and the rapscallions as they fave the Clawyouits this week in what is sure to be a bloodly mess. Hug Mr. Pringles tight this may be his last game. Clawyouits win.

The BC face off against the snake riders, this is bash v, anti agility and i figure on bash winning that battle as they have nothing to be agile about. BC win.

Lastly Farts v. Bombers. The farts are coached by infamous lucker MenonaLoco so i think the loco luck takes this game over and the farts win.

JIM: That's all we have for you today. We really hope we have offened someone and we also hope that Anti stays skeered as it will likely be the only win the seekers get this season. lastly but not least we hope that Baz feels better and that Arc gets his panties out of a bunch about the bad run of luck he has had lately? have we forgotten anyone? oh we have a brittish guy now so fish and chips sucks.
MenonaLoco



Joined: Jan 05, 2016

Post   Posted: Nov 16, 2019 - 03:38 Reply with quote Back to top

hahahahaaa

i am offended indeed! So un-canadian of you! First of all, when will you finally show some respect and play the canadian hymn at the beginning of your programm OOOOHHHHHHH CANADAAAAAAA!!!!

And then the insult! The INSULT! Loco luck? After Chicxulub hit our team last playoffs, we are now part of extinction rebellion! After the big mass extinction you still call this crap team a result of luck? Luck would be, not getting pitch cleared by a fucking rock!!! Or iceball, or timber, or whatever it is they throw at players in canada...

Now after the blackface-skandal around our chainsaw player and team owner, he was so ashamed and sorry, he just kept apologizing and didn't even cut right, last game. Now what could be done about that? Survives the Chicxulub just with a niggled injury, yeyyy, and now this. Braindead apologizer. With a chainsaw. Uggghhhh...
Waagh



Joined: Apr 13, 2019

Post   Posted: Nov 26, 2019 - 18:17 Reply with quote Back to top

JIM: Hello sports fans and welcome to week three in the CBFL on CBS!

OWIE: And what a week we have for you folks the main divisions look to catch up to U-Sports in games played.

JIM: WAIT WHATS THAT! Is that a giant turkey!? Where did it come from!?

OWIE: It can't be a turkey, it has two heads and tentcals growing out of its (redacted)!

JIM: It is choas turkey! Everyone run for your lives!!!!

*Flash of light whiff of ozone*

JIM: Welcome everyone to week 4 of the CBFL on CBS.

OWIE: wasn't I just week 3?

JIM: yes Owie it was week three last week.

OWIE: WAIT what about chaos turkey?

JIM: You must be imagining things again Owie. Anyway, this week's matchups look to be real barn burners. New coach Kyphexler takes the pitch with his new nipon team (another terrible choice for 7s) against my favorite choice for roster in nuffins lizards. The other two U-Sports games have already taken place with the crybabies winning over rotos Norse squad, it came at a high price as ex-con died for a second time. Good news though as roto now takes the pitch as their newest crybaby. Meanwhile TimRs terrible krugan squad eeked out a win over some British guys equally terrible 4 nation's team.

OWIE: Are you done blathering on about U-Sports?

JIM: blathering? You've been listening to PC on the podcast too much... Blathering...

OWIE: In real sports we have the redfarts winning against the nose rubbers in a game where 3 players played their last game. We all love death and destruction!

Now for the analysis of the games to be played. First gortrekslayer goes up against wafflehouse in what is sure to be another bloody mess for the poor seekers. Gortrek just seems to have wafflehouse's number as waffle rarely manages a win against gortrek. That trend will continue this week.

The Clawyouits will likely decimate the snake riders this week. Look for lots of blood here as the Snakeriders just won't have the survivability against these dastardly deamons.

the rapscallions are on bye this week as the coach of the straw hats seems to be lost in the warp. Likely from last week's turkey incident. My friend arcyan will get a chance to rest his rats and come out strong next week.

Last but not least Charlie's air elemental team looks to turn things around against saladbars skink squad. It is just a matter of time before those skinks break and I am predicting it happens this week against Charlie. Let's see if old chuck can get hat passing game going and build some skills against the stunty terrors!

JIM: well that's all we have for you today but I would like to mention some new prospects to the CBFL in ex-convict, apojar, kzarik, and razmus, I'm sure none of you will read this as I am pretty sure menona and my friend arcyan are probably reading it multiple times to boost my ego but none the less I offer some advice take good rosters not crappy ones. Ok signing off!
MenonaLoco



Joined: Jan 05, 2016

Post   Posted: Dec 09, 2019 - 05:48 Reply with quote Back to top

WE WANT NEXT CBFL ON CBS!!!!
Waagh



Joined: Apr 13, 2019

Post   Posted: Dec 10, 2019 - 00:49 Reply with quote Back to top

JIM: Hello sports fans! We're back with another episode of the CBFL on CBS!

OWIE: That's right Jim apparently this is now a biweekly show rather than a weekly show. Oh and hey we have now passed 5000 views!

JIM: That's great Owie! Apparently the people of fumbbl have nothing better to do than read the ravings of a madman talking to himself.

OWIE:What?

JIM: We have an exciting special report for our episode today. Our very own Gaptooth Loseham! Later we have week 6 matchups to talk about so let's get right to it take it away Gaptooth.

GAPTOOTH: Hello everyone Gaptooth here and speaking with me today is legendary chainsaw artist, team Capitan and, owner of the Ottowa RedFarts, Justin Trud'ohh First can I say what an honor it is to speak with you today. Welcome to the show!

JUSTIN: Good afternoon, Mr. Gaptooth, thank you for inviting me, it's wonderful to be here.

GAPTOOTH:The RedFarts are having a great season this year in no small part due to your great leadership. With so much player turnover, how do you keep getting the most out of all these rookie players?

JUSTIN: Thank you, we are having indeed a good season. But it has not been easy. After the mary sues exterminated our team last season, essentially, we started to look at what was left and what went wrong. We soon found out, we have not been diverse enough. Today we are the most diverse roster in the CBFL. Just take for example Miss Ottawa, she is with us now for 2 games already.

GAPTOOTH:Yes. Indeed. Speaking of diversityand player turnover you recently lost a great player and beloved Canadian in Rachel McAdams. Do you have anything to say about her loss? What did it mean to you? To the team?

JUSTIN: sob Sometimes life can be unfair. She survived the Chicxulub against the Mary Sues, swore revenge for her 4 killed team mates, just to die shortly after. Stabbed in the face. And when.... sob and then, when Dr Ian Paterson tried to remove the blade sob there was just so much blood, and in the end he got the knife out, but her face was irrecognizable. So, she didn't even have a chance to avenge her 4 team mates and i am sure, that's what bothers her soul most right now. sob

GAPTOOTH: *hands a tissue* I am so sorry for your loss truly her loss was felt across the league

JUSTIN:Thank you, i appreciate that.

GAPTOOTH: Well your next opponent after your bye this week is the very mean very scary slansheral Clawyouits. What is your game plan for this game? Do you fear having to go through another rebuild so close to the playoffs?

JUSTIN:Ah ah äh ah ah I am sure we have a winning strategy for this game. First we'll take the streets and continue protesting this terrible 2-on-the-LOS - rule. In original bb7s you don't even share a LOS, no reason to risk so many players' lives by putting 2 there. So, we will keep protesting against this injustice and also avoid their deadliest players, but maybe the best strategy would be to foul out. You know, the best redfart on the pitch does an obvious foul so he gets ejected to safety. flag_ca innocent

GAPTOOTH: I would like to thank you for your time. It has been an honor working with you and I am glad I could catch you durring your bye week!

JUSTIN: Thank you for having me.

GAPTOOTH: Back to you in the studio

JIM: Well with all the time we spent on that nonsense we have very little time to talk about the other CBFL games this week. What should we do Owie?

OWIE: Well Justin talked about his own game the seekers and scallions already played their game a 3-3 score fest and we will just skip U-Sports altogether to save on time.

JIM: Perfect. So the rubbers take on the BC in what is sure to be a bloodbath. I don't know who is going to score more touchdowns but I think the BC will do the most damage BC wins with a cas of 3-1

The ballers are on bye and the Lizzie's take on the snake riders. If anyone can stop these skinks it will be the snakemen. Relying on dodges and agility play against the snakes is disasterious. I have the snakemen in this one.

OWIE: See it wasn't that hard to get in everything important.

JIM. Thanks everyone for reading. We will see you next week!
Waagh



Joined: Apr 13, 2019

Post   Posted: Dec 16, 2019 - 05:11 Reply with quote Back to top

JIM: Hello everyone and welcome to week 7 of the CBFL ON CBS! My name is Jim Green and with me as always is Owie Long.

OWIE: Great to be here Jim. We have more great matchups to talk about today than you can shake a stick at. What are you doing Jim put that stick down.

JIM: This is a cane Owie, I'm finally recovering from that head truama from last season. Let's talk first about U-Sports! In what was supposed to be an exciting game the crybabies beat the slime off the University of maple leaps. So unfortunate. I really thought that new to CBFL coach Ex-convict would be able to give Garcangel a run for his money but the only thing the leaps fans are running for is the store to get paper bags to put over their heads at the next home game! With very few skills and some game one injuries the leaps are going to have to play it safe for a game or two to recover and build before they start after aggressive wins.

The coldbloods are no stranger to getting garced as they come off of back to back demoralizations at the hands of the crybabies. This week they go up against the nabsters 4 nation's squad out of Quebec. This matchup favors the coldbloods on paper. Once the lizards start getting some block and mighty blow they will be a force to be reckoned with sprinkle in some better screening and positioning and they can be unstoppable. I like the bloods I'm this game

The horde take on the Huskies in what is sure to be a slugfest. And I'm not talking about a festival for slimey critters that eat your tomatoes. These two teams are bruisers or are at least set up to be as they develop. The nipon have the speed advantage and will win. But their may not be enoughof them alive to have a victory party.

OWIE: That was a nice story Jim. I liked the part about the death and maiming. Always makes me think about your mother when you talk about murder.

Anyway enough romance let's talk blood bowl! The nose rubbers are up against Charlie and his air elementals. Nither team is doing all that well this season and I expect both coaches to pick better teams for next season. Common boys this league is full of metapowergamers... He on board. I guess I will take the ballers. PS. Charlie drinks waffle flavored hateraid.


The seekers are up against the snake riders this week in what is sure to be an uphill battle for the seekers. Joining the mettabattle the snake riders are designed to deal with elves. Let's hope they at least get stabbed in the face for their efforts. Riders win

The Clawyouits are on bye thank nuffle.

The BC are up against the small Lizzie's. Both teams are looking good this season and should be playoff bound. The small Lizzie's are faster so I am picking them to win this game but rest assured they will be rebuilding after this one as the BC will be hitting hard as always

Last we have the game of the week as the rapscallions go up against the redfarts. Well if these two teams weren't beat all to hell and the scallions weren't missing their best player it would be the game of the week. Don't let these teams fool you. There will be blood I'm this game too as the assassin's stab. Chainsaws rip and rogers roar their way into a bloody mess. When these two destroy eachother the whole league wins! I'm picking the rats. Full tilt will commence when Keanu gets a perm

JIM: Good stuff Owie. Well we actually got this edition out on time. Sure all 5 viewers will be proud. So if your a viewer why not make some picks of your own? See if you can beat the "experts" and if you can maybe there will be some kind of prize. Probably not. But do you want to take the risk there isn't? See you next week sports fans!
Tzalaran



Joined: Mar 01, 2018

Post   Posted: Dec 16, 2019 - 05:58 Reply with quote Back to top

figured the defending champs would get a bit more love, especially after beating the Redfarts and making coach Trudoh go full tilt on himself staying in the KO box most of the game. That's ok, we feed on hatred and are looking forward to smashing skinks while running from Kroxes all next week.

love reading this, even if i don't comment much.
MenonaLoco



Joined: Jan 05, 2016

Post   Posted: Dec 16, 2019 - 06:32 Reply with quote Back to top

wow wow wow, slow down, champ. Trudoh is the franchise OWNER, he is NOT the coach. Big difference.
Garcangel



Joined: May 04, 2006

Post   Posted: Dec 16, 2019 - 14:25 Reply with quote Back to top

Ex-con got garced!
MenonaLoco



Joined: Jan 05, 2016

Post   Posted: Dec 16, 2019 - 18:09 Reply with quote Back to top

Indded Smile

https://www.fumbbl.com/p/match?id=4108498

Nice performance by MenonaLoco, captain of the crybabies Very Happy
Garcangel



Joined: May 04, 2006

Post   Posted: Dec 16, 2019 - 21:42 Reply with quote Back to top

Menona is our best player!
Waagh



Joined: Apr 13, 2019

Post   Posted: Dec 28, 2019 - 06:01 Reply with quote Back to top

JIM: HO HO HO Merry Christmas and welcome to week 8 and a very special holiday edition of the CBFL on CBS!

OWIE: Isn't Christmas over Jim?

JIM: you are supposed to keep it in your heart all the year long anyway Owie sure it is fine. Anyway it is a HOLIDAY edition of the show so let's remember that Hanukkah and Quanza are around this time of year too.

OWIE: And everyones favorite drinking holiday! New year's!

JIM: That's right Owie. And now on to our yule tide perdictions of Holly jolly murder on the pitch! Let's start with U-Sports shall we?

OWIE: Well Garc made sure to lay another beat down on the horde before leaving for snowboarding season! Any way the beating was sever and Tim has wisely changed races to something elfy that can compete.

ex-con's maple leaps take on nuffins coldbloodst his week in a battle of which team is more green. While the coldbloods are fairly green the leaps understand that "it ain't easy being green" I think they will take the win while the coldbloods work to hget some much needed skills on their team to make them more competitive.

Last I like the Huskies over the angilas. The nipon positionals are developing nicely. The 4 nation's squad has been playing well and also winning games but the break away speed if the nipon will be the deciding factor here.

JIM: looks like you are finally taking U-Sports more serious Owie! It is a festivious miericle! So what's going on over in the main league Owie?

OWIE: well the Clawyouits made "short" work of the small Lizzie's defeating them and moving to 7-1-0 the Clawyouits have become the dominant force in the league with the perfect mis of strength speed and agility! Someone please kill some of these players to even the odds again!

The snake riders are on by this week

The bc are up against the red farts just when coach MenonaLoco though his team was coming back together they have to go up against the deadliest teams in the league! Good luck God speed Happy hunting to both of you! The farts will win but at what cost?

Chuck v. WaffleHouse. The fight of the century this game could send one of these two teams to the playoffs if they win! This is a must win game for both teams which is why waagh will choke like he always dose! I'm taking Charlie

Lastly I'm taking the rapscallions over the rubbers 2.0. those tricky rats are fast and agile. Everything they need to be to dominate 7s they are looking a little banged up but that won't stop coach arcayn from going deep in the grey cup playoffs this season.

So to all a good night! And to all a Happy non denominational gender neutral celebration of your choosing!

And remember as you sleep tonight the red gobno is watching and if you have been naughty there will be 1s anf skulls in your stockings I the morning!
MenonaLoco



Joined: Jan 05, 2016

Post   Posted: Dec 29, 2019 - 07:01 Reply with quote Back to top

Nice one, Waaagh!

Whenever you do the playoff predictions, consider the new crossover rule: If one CBFL division's 3rd place is worse than the other division's 4th place, that 4th place team hops into the 3rd team's playoff slot!
Waagh



Joined: Apr 13, 2019

Post   Posted: Jan 11, 2020 - 02:33 Reply with quote Back to top

JIM: Hello everyone and welcome to the CBFL on CBS! We have for you today a very special playoffs edition of the show. So without further adue let's have a look at the matchups. OWIE?

OWIE: That's right Jim hotdogs do taste better with katsup. But we're not here to talk about food were here to talk about blood bowl. Our first matchup pits the mettapowergamerantielf snake riders against the elfiest elfs the BC cribabies led of course by team Capitan Waagh. Now it may sound crazy but I am going to take the elfs in this one. Coach garc knows how to elf really well so if any elf team is gonna win against the riders it will be this one.

Next we have the seekers, making thw playoffs thanks to the crossover rules, against the BC. Coach gortrek has absolutely owned coach Waagh in the past and I doubt this matchup will produce different results. I'm taking the BC here. The combo of bash with the speed of those samurai is just something coach Waagh hasn't been able to deal with yet.

Over in the east the unstoppable slansheral goes up against U-Sports second place Huskies. Pooooor Huskies. They have no idea the storm of hatred they walked into. Such a young team gone too soon under the boots of the killers from slansheral.

The game of week one of the playoffs will no doubt be the scallions v. The redfarts. This is the best rivalry in the CBFL. These two teams love to hate eachother and violence always takes center stage even though both these teams can score on command. I like Ottowa in this game. They always make a deep run in the playoffs and Baltimore I just a little too banged up to go all the way. There have been some rumors rumbling that coach Arcayn may switch to a faster rat race if things don't go well here. So we will see. Will the rats outrun the chainsaws? Find out on the next episode of dragon Ball z.
MenonaLoco



Joined: Jan 05, 2016

Post   Posted: Jan 11, 2020 - 03:56 Reply with quote Back to top

#PrayForHuskies
Poor Huskies indeed.
Rip young hopeful team.
Ban 2 on the LOS!!!

Solid predictions, we got real experts in Canada. Except that one fact, that we "always" make a deep playoff run. Eh, well, yes, we won the first season, but, eh, second season our first apocalypse, äh, "game" was against the Mary Sues... But yeah, hopefully you are right, we can go deeper than that, this time.
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