50 coaches online • Server time: 14:32
Forum Chat
Log in
Recent Forum Topics goto Post Secret League Americ...goto Post DOTP Season 4goto Post Skittles' Centu...
SearchSearch 
Post new topic   Reply to topic
View previous topic Log in to check your private messages View next topic
Nightbird



Joined: Aug 02, 2003

Post   Posted: Oct 29, 2010 - 08:48 Reply with quote Back to top

Image

NWFL Insider #1

Hello sports fans this is How-Ord Flo-Zel bringing you the inaugural issue of NWFL Insider in which we will take a trip around the league, review games, update the injury report, talk stats & name our game of the week.

Game of the Week
In our 1st match we have the Buffalo Billed Platipi easily rolling over the rats of Underground Sevwer Association by a score of 4-2! This looked to be a high scoring endeavor from the start & it did not dissappoint coming in as the high scoring game of the week w/ 6 total td\'s. But wait folks there\'s more, as this game also gave the thirsty crowd plenty of blood w/ 5 total casulaties. In the end the apothecaries worked their magic though and only two men suffer permanent injuries.

Moving on to our 2nd match we have the Dover Gem Finders vs Orcs R Us. This game was a grind that ended tied as neither team could seem to find the opening to secure the win, but boy there was plenty of blood w/ 4 total casualties & 3 permanent injuries. In the end two Gem Finders called it quits as their injuries proved to much for them to continue on playing the game they love. Far well you tiny terrors, we won\'t miss you, hahahahaha.

In our 3rd match we have a bit of a mystery? The Sangrial Suckers showed up at the field only to find out that coach onionking and his Groaning Cemetary Blackguards were no where to be found. The game has since been post poned, but we will keep you informed as to when it will be made up. Coach Sigmar1 was not pleased & has submitted all the forms to have coach onionking removed fromthe league for his seeming lack of commitment. More on this as it develops.

In our 4th match we have the Naggarond Nightstalkers vs the Canvas Professionals. Boy was this a ball handling disaster for the Dark ones & I thought elfs were agile, boy was I wrong. This game was a clean cut rout w/ the Professionals pulling off a seemingly flawless win shutting out the Nightstalkers 2-0! Unfortunately the slippery lizards paid in full w/ star saurusVittore Carpaccio being booted to death on the pitch and w/ his apothecary dead drunk in the dug-out it was curtains for Vitore, RIP buddy.

Blood Bath of the Week
In our 5th match we have the Chikilgo Bearz, coming off their spotless pre-season championship, vs the Hillbilly Rays. This one was bloody crowd pleaser w/ 6 total casualties & KO's galore! The Bearz saw some serious regression in this one, not being able to run even the simplest of plays. This game was a back & forth scrum w/ one team never holding the ball for long. The Rays put the smack down on the over-confident Bearz handing them 4 of the 6 casualties & 5 KO's in the first half. The Rays also permanently injured star guard Keith Van Khorne, fracturing his leg. He will under-go surgery this week to insert a steel plate in his leg, but the doctors say it will never fully heal. It's what they call a niggling injury & he WILL miss some games in the future. On the flip side the Bearz could barely scratch a bone on the Rays & even when they did the Rays necromancer had them right back up and ready to get back in the game. In the end the Bearz D, stout as always, managed to keep the Rays off the board & went home w/ a 0-0 tie. Not apparently happy w/ the tie the Rays used their last play of the game to surprisingly surround the Fridge and attempt to boot him to death. Their efforts were nil as the Fridge held strong & walked off the field laughing at the weak boney boot-party. The rest of the team, however, was not so jovial about this action and has sworn to get revenge at the underhanded tactic!

For our last game of the week we had the New Ungerland Paintreeots vs Everything dead is alive again. This game was another grinded out tie ending at 1-1. The crowd was pleased as the casualties totaled 5 & the players all seeme d to make it out fine w/out any permanent injuries to the joy of both teams. The Patriots though had the better day as they racked up 4 of the 5 casualties on their undead opponents.

Looking ahead to week 2 we have some great match-ups & we\'ll find out more about the mysterious disappearance of coach onionking & his Cemetary Blackguards!

Week Two Match-Ups

Buffalo Billed Platypi @ Orcs R Us
Dover Gem Finders @ Sangrial Suckers
Underground Sewer Association @ Groaning Cemetary Blackguards
Naggarond Nightstalkers @ Chikilgo Bearz
Hillbilly Rays @ New Ungerland Paintreeots
Canvas Professionals @ Everything Dead is Alive Again

Injury Report

The injury report for week 2 is as follows:

Vittore Carpaccio, Canvas Professionals (Death)
Corn Biscuit Bennett, Buffalo Billed Platipi (Death)
Keith Van Khorne, Chikilgo Bearz (Miss Game, Niggling Injury)
Rerger Goblinsmasher, Dover Gem Finders (Miss Game, Niggling Injury, Retired)
Uice Elfender, Dover Gem Finders (Miss Game, Armor Value drop, Retired)
Symon, Underground Sewer Ass. (Miss Game)
Willy Head Smusher, Orcs R Us (Miss Game)

Until next time, this is How-Ord Flo-Zel signing off!

For more information on the NWFL:
http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=group&op=view&group=6836

DISCLAIMER: PLEASE DO NOT REPLY IN THIS THREAD, IT'S JUST FOR THE PUBLISHING OF NWFL INSIDER & YOUR READING ENJOYMENT. THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION.

_________________
"If most of us remain ignorant of ourselves, it's because self-knowledge is painful
& we prefer the pleasures of illusion." ~Aldous Huxley


Last edited by Nightbird on May 28, 2011 - 18:07; edited 12 times in total
Nightbird



Joined: Aug 02, 2003

Post   Posted: Oct 30, 2010 - 06:27 Reply with quote Back to top

Image

NWFL Insider: Special Report!

This is How-Ord Flo-Zel w/ a special report following up on the mysterious disappearance of general manager onionking, head coach & necromancer Abenzafer Dogrola & The Groaning Cemetary Blackguards organization.

Folks I've used all my contacts on this mystery & have found out some startling information about the cause of the disappearance. In this case we need to look way back to the very begining & creation of the Blackguards...

It was two hundred and one years ago that Abenzafer Dogrola almost lost his sanity. He was obsessed w/ finding the famed necropolis of Nuffle & it's treasures, wishing to use them to create an empire in his own image. As he finally stood at the necropolis, though, his vision had changed. Having been persuaded earlier in the year into taking in the Chaos cup, by a Lahmian Enchantess that he was courting at the time, he now wished to dominate the blood bowl circuit by stealing the greastest players souls enshrined at Nuffles necropolis.

And so he sent in his most trusted & non-ambitious disciple to perform the rituals that would give him all the souls he needed to raise the greatest undead team to ever grace the pitch. The rituals were seemingly a success & the Groaning Cemetary Blackguards were born. Coach Dogrola & his Blackguards, however started poorly going 1/2/3 in there first 6 games & lost two mummies in the process; coach Dogrola was not pleased. He wanted someone to blame for this poor start.

Coach Dogrola decided he would take out his rage on the enbalmers of his mummies, as their faulty process must be to blame. The coach called on his two star wights, Sigurd Chilltouch & Emeriz Deathglance to seek out, capture & bring these embalmers to him. They were succesful & brought Fael Bloodstool & Char Brokenbone to audience w/ coach Dogrola. He demanded their best most perfect work or he would burn them along w/ their whole village to the ground!

Fael & Char worked tirelessly & having been provided w/ all the best equipment & fluids they were triumphant! Standing before them were their greatest creations, Sethukenarion & Innohothep. Coach Dogrola was pleased & for their great work rewarded them both w/ DEATH! He then sent his minions to burn their village to the ground. You see coach Dogrola had no intentions of allowing anyone else to have such great creations & was deterimined to wipe any trace of Fael & Char out of existence.

In the following weeks the Blackguards, seemingly on top of the world, found their glory, ripping off 6 straight wins! This glory, however, was short lived as in their 7th game they were shut out 2-0 & demolished by the reigning Superior Bowl Champions, the Sangrial Suckers, who dealt them 6 casualties as well as an ultimate humiliation. In the locker room after the game Dogrola was furious & went into a rage. How could Nuffle do this to him, how could he be so weak & faulty of a god to let these vampires pummel & disrespect him so!? He cried out in rage at his god disavowing him & spurting the most blasphemous of words he could bring to mind. Suddenly their was silence, he could not hear his voice, he was frozen in place w/ his team around him frozen too. A mighty voice called forth w/ such authority & power it could only be his lord & god Nuffle!

"Abenzafer Dogrola!" said the dooming voice, "You have been given great power & the blessing of Nuffle, but you have shown to be an unworthy & retched soul even for my disgusting tastes. You & your minions shall pay for your blashphemous words & deeds. You have doomed all around you!" He tried to plead, he tried to beg for mercy, but in that instant all Abenzafer Dogrola & the whole Blackguards organization saw was a flash of light, then came a feeling of burning, searing pain & then nothing. All that remained was a pile of ash & bone. And w/ that the whole of the Blackguards organization was gone, wiped away in an instant by the wrath of the great lord of Blood Bowl, his excelence Nuffle, as if they had never existed.

How did I get this story, what was my source? That my friends is a journalists secret. What I can tell you is the Blackguards have been replaced. By who you say? Well that my loyal readers is for another time.

Until next time, this is How-Ord Flo-Zel signing off!

For more information on the NWFL:
http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=group&op=view&group=6836

DISCLAIMER: PLEASE DO NOT REPLY IN THIS THREAD, IT'S JUST FOR THE PUBLISHING OF NWFL INSIDER & YOUR READING ENJOYMENT. THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION.

_________________
"If most of us remain ignorant of ourselves, it's because self-knowledge is painful
& we prefer the pleasures of illusion." ~Aldous Huxley


Last edited by Nightbird on May 28, 2011 - 17:57; edited 4 times in total
Nightbird



Joined: Aug 02, 2003

Post   Posted: Nov 09, 2010 - 07:45 Reply with quote Back to top

Image

NWFL Insider #2

Welcome sports fans this is How-Ord Flo-ZeL bringing you another edition of NWFL Insider!

Game of the Week
The Platypi continue to fly high, pulling out all of the tools in the shed for this match vs. the hated green skins of Orcs R Us. We saw the game start w/ some controversy over whether the ref was on the take or not & from the looks of this one folks Orcs R Us may have a case! Regardless, the Platypi laid boots & spiked fists, used the rush & the drop back pass to full effectiveness. They pummeled the Orcs into submission w/out but a scratch on themselves whist killing two men & seriously injuring two more! As far as a ref for the game well w/ 11 fouls total what do you think? The Orcs managed a score, but limped away from this one w/ some very bad injuries that may effect the rest of the season. I sense the next match between these two may be a very different occasion. This one is to be continued…

Bloodbath of the Week
Here we have the defending Superior Bowl champs, the Suckers vs. the Stout dorfs of Dover. Oh the Suckers came out in full swagger, as they have all season so far, but ohhhh did they pay! The dorfs stuck it to the arrogant vampires in this one folks, dominating the game and causing a wopping 7 casulaties to boot! This game didn’t dissapoint w/ 9 total casualties as the vamps got a few licks in there as well and did manage a score to at least make it interesting. It seemed though, that the vampires were more interested in sating their always dangerous lust for blood and munching on their team mates than doing anything that seemed like playing. I guess the maidens in the crowd just weren’t up to par in this one, as one very um…slim, ehrm & lovely, yes lovely maiden had this to say “I came here hoping to meet a nice count and feel his passionate lust filled bite on my neck & what do I get, NADA, ZIP, ZERO! I’m done w/ these stuck up arrogant creatures & I hope they don‘t win another match!” So um…there you have it folks!

Now here we have the new addition to the league, the amazon Women of Emerald, who replaced the doomed undead and their blasphemous organization, vs. the dangerous clawed rats of the Sewer Association. Woah, these women are tough folks as they sure dulled the rats and their claws dealing out 5 casualties whilst walking away w/ the win & not a scratch, pun intended, on them! The big losses here are for the rats as The Big Cheese Jr, the teams stout guard & rat ogre, was killed & the always dangerous & quick gutter Myra gained yet another lingering injury that’s sure to hamper her teams success in the future. All I can say is respect these women folks, they out-blocked the dangerous rats by nearly triple!

Here was a nice defensive battle of evil w/ the dark elven Nightstalkers vs. the chaos spawned Chikilgo Bearz. The Bearz did all they could, but the ineffective blocking right before the half allowed the agile elfs to score & this proved to be the deciding factor. But oh boy, more controversy here folks w/ suspected bribes being offered for a secret bounty on the Bearz star warrior Baron Killiam Scary, otherwise known as ‘The Fridge’. There are rumors that none other than the reigning Superior Bowl champs offered a bounty to the dark elfs for Killiams demise. Well if you know dark elfs & I do, they were quick to act on this suspected bounty & in fact they also apparently tampered w/ the Bearz apothecary as he was dead drunk when called upon! Early in the first half the dark elfs made their move, quickly surrounding the super strong Scary w/ enough men to secure both his fall & the ensuing boot from a rather strange looking (cross-dresser anyone?) elf in spiked heels. The move proved successful, as did their spiking of the Bearz apothecaries’ drink. The spiked heel came down square in the middle of Killiams back shifting his spine out of place & w/ the apothecary dead drunk all his spell of healing could do was fizzle as he hiccupped! Killiam was carried off the field & his injuries were tended to. Odorous Killson, though, was enraged & went on a tear gouging an eye, fracturing a leg & ko’ing two in an attempt to sate his rage. Another big hit for the Bearz that’s sure to effect them in future games.

Next we have the Hillbilly Rays vs. the Paintreeoots. The Paintreeoots clearly dominated this one w/ their mobility & agility, but there was a surprising lack of blood here w/ only 4 casualties between the two and the fans sure let them know! Not a one permanent injury for either side here, which could be an NWFL record between these two races folks! The play of the game, however, came from the Rays very own Thro-Ra Eli Ray when he dropped back in the pouring rain for an improbable long pass to rookie female skeleton, & apparently a really good cook, although what the hell a skeleton is cooking or for who is a mystery to me, Rachael Ray, who promptly caught the ball and scored the Rays only TD to end the first half! It was all for naught though, as the Paintreeoots came out for the 2nd half and continued their domination winning 2-1.

In our last match we have the slippery lizards of Canvas Professionals vs. the necromancer run Everything Dead is Alive Again. This was a very even match-up here w/ all the stat lines nearly identical aside from the score. The lizards bobbed and weaved their way to a 2-1 victory, but did leave w/ the sneaky, sidestepping skink, Ansel Adams, missing the next match. After the game the ref had this to say, “If I ever have to suffer through a game like this again well, I’m calling it quits! What a bore!” The crowd was heard to be chanting “MOAR BLOOD, MOAR BLOOD!” all game long only to be disappointed. A riot was nearly upon the pitch, but was avoided when the Professionals cheerleaders started shooting hand cannons loaded w/ free T-shirts and did in fact give the crowd their extra blood when a goblin was smashed by an on-coming t-shirt w/ a hidden rock in it!

***In a last minute addition we have the report from last weeks make-up game. The Sangrial Suckers beat the Women of Emerald 1-0.

Week 3 Match-ups:

Buffalo Billed Platypi vs. Dover Gemfinders
Underground Sewer Association vs. Sangrial Suckers
Women of Emerald vs. Orcs R Us
Naggarond Nightstalkers vs. Hillbilly Rays
Canvas Professionals vs. New Ungerlund Paintreeots
Everything Dead is Alive Again vs. Chikilgo Bearz

Week 3 Injury Report:

Ansel Adams, Canvas Professionals (Miss Game)
Ebon D’Ageless, Naggarond Nightstalkers (Miss Game)
Hakkon Blackblade, Naggarond Nightstalkers (Miss Game, Niggling Injury)
Baron Killiam ‘The Refridgerator’ Scary, Chikilgo Bearz (Miss Game, Niggling Injury)
Myra, Underground Sewer Association (Miss Game, Niggling Injury)
The Big Cheese Jr., Underground Sewer Association (DEATH)
Geroghe, Sangrial Suckers (Miss Game)
Libo Oathgrinder, Dover Gem finders (Miss Game)
Larry, Orcs R Us (Miss Game, Armor Value Drop)
Curly, Orcs R Us (DEATH)
Hairy Rockchewer, Orcs R Us (Miss Game)

Until next time sports fans this is How-Ord Flo-Zel signing off!

For more information on the NWFL:
http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=group&op=view&group=6836

DISCLAIMER: PLEASE DO NOT REPLY IN THIS THREAD, IT'S JUST FOR THE PUBLISHING OF NWFL INSIDER & YOUR READING ENJOYMENT. THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION.

_________________
"If most of us remain ignorant of ourselves, it's because self-knowledge is painful
& we prefer the pleasures of illusion." ~Aldous Huxley


Last edited by Nightbird on May 28, 2011 - 18:06; edited 3 times in total
Nightbird



Joined: Aug 02, 2003

Post   Posted: Nov 12, 2010 - 00:05 Reply with quote Back to top

Image

NWFL Insider #3

Hello sports fans this is How-Ord Flo-Zel bringing you another edition of NWFL Insider!

Well folks these Platypi seem to have something going this season as they remain unbeaten pulling a 1-1 tie w/ the dorfs of Dover. This one was a grind all the way w/ some serious heat beating down on the teams in the first half. Fortunately they closed the dome in the 2nd to get things a bit cooler, but things didn’t get cooler! Furious w/ their teams play the Dover fans charged the field to start the 2nd half w/ a riot, stunning Platypi left and right and even smacking around some of their own! Apparently their were even some female dorf fans in on this, but there’s no confirmation on that, as well….who can tell what a female dorf looks like? They have beards too don’t they? This reporter is at a loss folks! The sole injury, much to the crowds chagrin, was Don Beebegun. He’ll be out w/a concussion, but will return for week 5’s match-up w/ the tough Women of Emerald.

In our 2nd match-up we have the Suckers vs. the Sewer Association. Just before the start of this one Count Asmodai and Devoros were hit w/ a strange virus forcing them to miss the game. Folks this seems strange considering the rats of the Sewers are known for their expertise w/ disease. I suspect there may have been some tampering of the Suckers pre-match Bloodweiser! Turns out though, that this evened up the sides at 11-11. That wouldn’t last long as the rats quickly killed off an unsuspecting sucker on a quick turn one blitz and coach iron collar, fearful of the dangerously clawed rats, left him for dead! This would prove to be a bad decision as the Suckers dealt out the remainder of the damage never needing their apothecary again during the match. Folks this is down right wrong and this reporter is frankly appalled at the seemingly total disregard for life! Anyhow, the rats made quick work and had the game 2-0 at half. Then came the rain, pouring to start the 2nd half, but the Suckers, w/ only 7 thralls to field and despite a perfect defensive alignment by the rats, showed why they were the reining champs and pushed the ball down field, all the while dealing damage to the rats, and scored to make it 2-1. Having been pumped up by the thralls work, Count of Counting decided to jump in and w/ only 5 rats remaining took the ball in to end zone to make the final a 2-2 tie! There was apparently a celebration for a few of the players after the game to celebrate their 40th straight match. Congrats go to Token and Chump for playing in every Sucker match!

In our 3rd match we have a bit of a numerical advantage w/ the Women of Emerald fielding nearly a full roster vs. Orcs R Us w/ their 9 orcs and a goblin! Well things have been down hill all season for the orcs and today was no different. Complete domination in every area for the wild and feisty ladies. The orcs did manage to deal out a bit o’ pain though and sidelined Jenifael, one of the teams blitzing guards, for next match and badly hurting 3 more, but it was all to no avail. Orcs R Us dropped their 2 straight match and yet again lost some players for the following one. Once again this reporter is impressed w/the ladies in green. DO NOT underestimate these tough ladies as they may in fact be the real deal!

Game Of The Week
Naggarond Nightstalkers vs. Hillbilly Rays. Well what can I say about this one folks, but WOW! Khemri coming back from a 2-0 deficit at half to claim a tie vs. dark elfs! Unheard of! This reporter is astonished and happy to have witnessed this game sports fans! Was there rushing? YEP! Was there passing? YEP! Was there Blood? YEP! Were there boots? YEP! The Rays come out of this one in better shape though w/ not a scratch on their magically endowed bones, while the Nightstalkers lose a man for next match and retire another due to a niggling injury. This one had it all folks and earns the game of the week honors!

Next we have the lizard men of Canvas Professionals vs. The evil, but stout chaos dorfs of the New Ungerland Paintreeots. Though a quick, early score put the slippery lizards up 1-0, Nuffle shined on the Paintreeots & they equalized by half making the score 1-1. The second half came & New Ungerland lived up to it’s name dealing out two kills, one which the Pro’s apothecary saved, & badly hurting another while they drop slowly, but steadily down the field putting it in for the score at time expired. The Paintreeots have something going here folks & stand at the top of the division.

Bloodbath of the Week
In our last match, Everything Dead is Alive Again traveled to the chaos wastes to meet The Chikilgo Bearz at their home stadium Soldiers of Chaos Field. The Bearz needed to get back on track and rack up a win here folks & they accomplished just that in a brutal contest that saw 9 casualties & three forced retirements due to injury & death! The game started & Khorne shined on his minions as they kicked & quickly blitzed to receive their own kickoff. There was a skirmish for the ball, but in turn 5 the Bearz secured the score to take an early lead 1-0. On the ensuing kick-off the Bearz kicker Odorous Killson used his trusty Dr. Martins & his skill w/ the boot to place the kick within distance of the Bearz defenders. The plan worked as the Dead muffed the pick-up, however the ball was in 3 players zones. No problem, as the Bearz sent in Mongo, who was frothing at the mouth in anticipation of smashing the ghoul X-Ray, to frenzy his way through the 3 players surrounding the ball. Again it worked & the Bearz caught the ball on the bounce & after smashing X-Ray to the ground Killson came over & once again did his thing booting X-Ray to the KO box. The Bearz capitalized on this & the half ended 2-0 in their favor. The second half started w/ the Bearz receiving & after a blocking mishap the ball was popped lose & being so near the goal line Lord Filth picked up the ball and pushed his way in to make the game 2-1. This is how the game would end as the Bearz, after losing two key players safely protected the ball the remainder of the game. But wait, a late frivolous foul from the Dead brought out the rage, that is always bubbling inside of Killson & though it did not hurt his brother in arms his rage had to be quenched for this act. Odorous once again lived up to his name putting the Deads star wolf Grim, in the grave PEMANENTLY! The Bearz secured their first win, but at what cost? Keith Van Khorne & Thom Flayer, w/ injuries to severe were forced into retirement. Looks like it will be a long season for the Bearz & w/ only 11 men next game this could prove even more costly, but time will tell sports fans.

Week 4 Match-Ups:

Buffalo Billed Platypi @ Sangrial Suckers
Dover Gem Finders @ Women of Emerald
Underground Sewer Association @ Orcs R Us
Narggarond Nightstalkers @ New Ungerland Paintreeots
Hillbilly Rays @ Everything Dead is Alive Again
Canvas Professionals @ Chikilgo Bears

Week 4 Injury Report:

Don BeeBeegun, Buffalo Billed Platypi (Miss Game)
Count Gobolov, Sangrial Suckers (Miss Game)
Warm & Salty, Sangrial Suckers (DEATH)
Jenifael, Women of Emerald (Miss Game)
Gotts Grimbreath, Orcs R Us (Miss Game)
Shorty, Orcs R Us (MIss Game)
Thraaken Chill, Naggarond Nightstalkers (Miss Game)
Mirkfinster Blakken, Naggarond Nightstalkers (Miss Game, Niggling Injury, Retired)
Jim Davis, Canvas Professionals (DEATH)
Grim, Everything Dead is Alive Again (DEATH)
Thom Flayer, Chikilgo Bearz (Miss Game, Niggling Injury, Retired)
Keith Van Khorne, Chikilgo Bearz (Miss Game, Niggling Injury, Retired)

Until next time sports fans this is How-Ord Flo-Zel signing off!

For more information on the NWFL:
http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=group&op=view&group=6836

DISCLAIMER: PLEASE DO NOT REPLY IN THIS THREAD, IT'S JUST FOR THE PUBLISHING OF NWFL INSIDER & YOUR READING ENJOYMENT. THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION.

_________________
"If most of us remain ignorant of ourselves, it's because self-knowledge is painful
& we prefer the pleasures of illusion." ~Aldous Huxley


Last edited by Nightbird on May 28, 2011 - 18:03; edited 1 time in total
Nightbird



Joined: Aug 02, 2003

Post   Posted: Nov 18, 2010 - 00:16 Reply with quote Back to top

Image

NWFL Insider #4

Welcome sports fans this is How-Ord Flo-Zel bringing you another edition of NWFL Insider!

Sangrial Suckers @ Buffalo Billed Platypi: A grudge match? It appears so, as the post match interviews included a plethora (yes, a plethora!) of expletives from both coaches folks! This was a game of defense sports fans, but if you’re like me & I know you are, you REALLY enjoyed this match! The first half was mostly all Suckers. They pushed left, then right, then back left, each time foiled by the stout defense of the Platypi. Finally though an opportunity presented itself, as Chump a very strong & talented thrall apparently slipped, on of all things, a banana peel! Yes folks a banana peel, it really does happen! This seemingly thwarted the Suckers chances at scoring & James Lofty swooped in quickly surfing Count Asmodai into the crowd, but then OH NOES! While trying to get back & secure the ball Lofty tripped (word is it was the same banana peel!) & Counting quickly grabbed the ball & slipped in for the score. The half ended w/ some stout D by the Suckers keeping the score 1-0. The second half was all defense & even being outnumbered the whole way, the Suckers D held strong. There was a shot for the Platypi to tie though folks, but complete failure in ball handling secured the win for the Suckers. Key points here are the kill Bryce Pulp inflicted on thrall Devoros & the devastating foul, from of all people Gustov the Timid, on star blitzer Thermal Thomas niggling him & putting his future in jeopardy. So sports fans, I guess the Platypi are who we thought they were. They started strong & looked very dominating, but the last two games may have show us the real view. Only time will tell.

Game of the Week/ Blood bath of the Week

Women of Emerald @ Dover Gemfinders: In a double dip here we have both the game of the week AND the bloodbath of the week! This one was a dozy folks & showed us all just how much dorfs and zons hate each other! 9 total casualties w/ 2 permanent injuries, 13, yes 13, total fouls, plenty of trash talk & a final score of 2-1 w/ the dorfs easily dominating the, seemingly human after all, tough ladies from the jungle. What a match sports fans & for this reporter, it was a pleasure to have been there to see this one in person!

Underground Sewer Association @ Orcs R Us: This one started poorly right from the get go for the USA team. After losing the Big Cheese Jr., to a career ending injury in a previous match, they convinced his dad the Big Cheese to come out of retirement for this game. Well, the comeback didn’t start well for the Big Cheese as on his first play he tripped, fell & cracked his head on a rock suffering a concussion & will miss the next game. That would be the best news of the day for the USA team, as they lost 2 other rats to death, having used up all the apothecaries potion on another seriously injured team member. This game was mass chaos sports fans w/ bad blood quickly spreading amongst the teams. Several members of the USA team were ejected along w/ one or two from the Orcs as well. Seems these rats are getting tired of being beaten up & embarrassed! The one lone highlight of this match for the rats was when Myra used her super-speed to blitz JoJo Montana & in the process rip his beating heart right out. Myra even mistook his heart for the ball & continued on her way to the end zone thinking she would score! Bloody great stuff & the crowd sure loved it! Unfortunately that was it for the rats & the Orcs R Us team cruised to an easy 2-0 win whist severly beating down their opponent dealing 5 total casualties while mixing in some sneaky boots to the head. And so the woes continue for the USA team dropping their 3rd match in 4 games. The Orcs however, look to be on this rise after this one sports fans, but can they keep their team healthy, that is the question.

Hillbilly Rays @ Everything Dead is Alive Again: Sports fans this one started out, surprisingly, w/ a few little tricks from the Necro team. Seems before the game their wizard cast a spell of confusion on one of the Rays mummies effectively bone-heading him for the match, as well as secured ,w/ the ref, an extra play during the half by handing over a bit o’ gold. Ah gold, everyone’s friend eh. A fairly straight forward match here & gauging from the crowd, not too exciting of one either! When there’s hardly any blood or well in this case bones smashed or rotted flesh torn, the crowd generally isn’t happy. And even the fouls were few & far between here folks. Lucky there wasn’t a riot in this game, as that would have been truly gruesome! So, in the end, we see the Necro team recover from their last weeks loss & even win w/out their star wolf Grim, who was put to an early death, to win 2-1.

Naggarond Nightstalkers @ New Ungerland Paintreeots: Welp not much to say about this one sports fans. The Nightstalkers entered the game having only 8 men & by half time were down to 4 men. The Paintreeots took it to them and made it a rout w/ the game ending 3-0. The crowd was none too pleased w/ this scoring thing & kept on chanting for more blood & more fouls too no avail. Seems Nuffle is only favoring certain teams this season sports fans & the Paintreeots seem to be one of them, so watch out!

Chikilgo Bearz @ Canvas Professionals: After last weeks debacle & the forced retirement of two veterans, the Bearz entered todays game having only 11 men on the roster. Well sports fans things didn’t get any better for the Bearz today, as right before the game Von Rippera came down w/ a case of Morley’s Revenge. Try as he might, w/ his potions, after each drive the apothecary could not flush the sickness from Von, not one time! This, however, was only one part of the failed game plan for the Bearz. After receiving a deep kick, all the way in the end zone, to start the game the Bearz slowly worked on pushing the ball up field & things looked good. One failed block, in which the blocker actually got two shots at the big Saurus (RR), but couldn‘t put him down, put the Bearz in trouble. A big opening was left & a saurus waltzed in and smashed Painston, allowing a skink to pick up the ball & score to end the half. 2nd half started w/ the Bearz having just 8 men & things didn’t get any better. The Pro’s quickly set up a blitz on The Fridge, the Bearz most dangerous man, knocking him out of the game & giving him yet another concussion, which will keep him out of next weeks game. The bears tried to counter and quickly blitzed the ball carrier, but the skink was just to dodgey & slipped away for another score. By now the Bearz morale was very low & yet again they took the field w/ only 8 men. Odorous Killson was enraged, yet again (surprise, surprise), & received the ball thinking he would score to make things respectable. The Pro’s had other plans & even w/ a valiant effort things quickly deteriorated & the Pros scooped up the ball & scored their 3rd touchdown of the match. The Bearz had one more turn & hoped to at least draw some more blood, but lord Nuffle would have none of that and Samurai Mike was knocked down on the teams 2nd block to end the game 3-0. All in all a very poorly executed game for the Bearz & Nuffle himself was not at all on their side to boot. It’s gonna be a tough road for the Bearz the rest of the season.

Week 5 Match-ups:

Buffalo Billed Platypi @ Women of Emerald
Dover Gem finders @ Underground Sewer Association
Sangrial Suckers @ Orcs R Us
Naggarond Nightstalkers @ Everything Dead is Alive Again
Hillbilly Rays @ Canvas Professionals
New Ungerland Paintreeots @ Chikilgo Bearz

Week 5 Injury Report:

Devoros, Sangrial Suckers (DEATH)
Vostoc, Sangrial Suckers (Miss Game)
Thermal Thomas, Buffalo Billed Platypi (Miss Game, Niggling Injury)
Gabrelle, Women of Emerald (Miss Game)
Blanchi, Women of Emerald ( Miss Game, Niggling Injury, Retired)
Bhagan Stoneforger, Dover Gemfinders ( Miss Game)
Eire Nuggethunter, Dover Gem finders (Miss Game, Niggling Injury, Retired)
Sonn, Underground Sewer Association (DEATH)
Mekorok, Underground Sewer Association (DEATH)
The Big Cheese, Underground Sewer Association (Miss Game)
JoJo Montana, Orcs R Us (DEATH)
Rot, Everything Dead is Alive Again (Miss Game, Movement Drop)
Baron Killiam ‘The Refridgerator’ Scary, Chikilgo Bearz (Miss Game)
Jack Vettriano, Canvas Professionals (DEATH)

In a special news flash, we’ve just learned that star blitzer Davey Von Doomerson, of the Chikilgo Bearz, has been diagnosed w/ a pinched nerve in his back. This will surely keep him out of some future matches. Tough break folks, as the woes continue for the Bearz!

Until next time this is How-Ord Flo-Zel, signing off!

For more information on the NWFL:
http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=group&op=view&group=6836

DISCLAIMER: PLEASE DO NOT REPLY IN THIS THREAD, IT'S JUST FOR THE PUBLISHING OF NWFL INSIDER & YOUR READING ENJOYMENT. THANK YOU FOR YOUR COOPERATION.

_________________
"If most of us remain ignorant of ourselves, it's because self-knowledge is painful
& we prefer the pleasures of illusion." ~Aldous Huxley
Display posts from previous:     
 Jump to:   
All times are GMT + 1 Hour
Post new topic   Reply to topic
View previous topic Log in to check your private messages View next topic