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PainState
Last seen 41 weeks ago
Overall
Star
Overall
Record
26/9/28
Win Percentage
48%
Archive

2023

2023-02-04 17:58:02
rating 4.8

2022

2022-08-08 14:48:44
rating 5.5
2022-07-19 17:33:33
rating 6
2022-07-18 05:27:04
rating 2.2
2022-05-20 18:50:43
rating 4
2022-05-12 01:12:32
rating 4.3
2022-04-21 23:50:58
rating 3.7
2022-04-12 22:40:20
rating 6
2022-04-05 23:20:47
rating 3.9
2022-03-10 16:27:01
rating 4.9

2020

2020-05-03 07:34:33
rating 6

2017

2017-05-28 18:09:37
rating 2.7
2017-05-02 00:58:51
rating 5.6
2017-03-28 17:04:43
rating 6
2017-02-15 21:05:08
rating 1.6

2016

2016-12-22 16:53:44
rating 2.6
2016-11-28 16:13:58
rating 5.1
2016-11-23 00:10:48
rating 3.3
2016-10-13 21:15:04
rating 5.7
2016-09-29 15:51:47
rating 5.2
2016-09-16 20:14:49
rating 6
2016-09-14 17:00:29
rating 6
2016-09-14 16:01:17
rating 3.9
2016-07-23 16:32:20
rating 5.3
2016-07-19 17:47:59
rating 5
2016-06-25 21:04:03
rating 4.3
2016-06-12 21:36:21
rating 4.8
2016-06-06 22:51:10
rating 2.5
2016-06-05 19:25:46
rating 5.4
2016-05-26 22:54:20
rating 2.6
2016-04-29 15:48:57
rating 4.3
2016-04-19 19:13:19
rating 4.8
2016-04-13 21:04:41
rating 3.8
2016-04-10 19:33:28
rating 5.4
2016-03-21 14:09:51
rating 5.3
2016-03-02 03:03:07
rating 4.6
2016-02-24 16:25:09
rating 4.1
2016-02-19 03:53:14
rating 3.2
2016-02-12 20:41:29
rating 5.2
2016-01-30 16:28:26
rating 5.8
2016-01-23 17:47:37
rating 4.3

2015

2015-12-18 00:53:14
rating 4.8
2015-12-11 21:12:40
rating 5.3
2015-11-30 23:54:15
rating 2.3
2015-11-25 03:08:28
rating 2.5
2015-11-20 01:03:50
rating 2.3
2015-11-16 21:05:36
rating 3
2015-10-29 14:36:18
rating 5.5
2015-10-14 21:15:35
rating 5.3
2015-08-23 19:23:18
rating 4.1
2015-07-21 00:13:41
rating 2.1
2015-07-19 00:56:17
rating 4.8
2015-07-06 22:39:32
rating 4.5
2015-05-06 23:26:03
rating 2.4
2015-05-06 00:56:28
rating 5
2015-04-23 17:13:52
rating 5.5
2015-04-20 16:57:01
rating 3.1
2015-04-03 19:07:36
rating 2.5
2015-04-02 16:31:57
rating 6
2015-03-26 21:21:58
rating 2.5
2015-03-19 21:41:15
rating 3.8
2015-03-15 21:45:57
rating 6
2015-03-06 20:59:52
rating 5.4

2014

2014-12-12 17:09:54
rating 4.6
2014-12-11 17:13:23
rating 5.9
2014-11-05 16:46:44
rating 6
2014-10-30 14:34:43
rating 4.8
2014-10-17 15:13:05
rating 4.7
2014-10-07 16:06:14
rating 2.9
2014-09-16 18:24:00
rating 5.4
2014-09-11 16:30:01
rating 5
2014-08-27 17:17:00
rating 5.7
2014-08-25 23:30:37
rating 5.2
2014-08-10 03:48:36
rating 4.1
2014-08-10 00:33:36
rating 4.2
2014-08-08 00:16:11
rating 5.1
2014-06-17 06:00:55
rating 5.5
2014-06-05 18:19:07
rating 4.1
2014-06-05 16:53:58
rating 2.1
2014-04-25 15:02:03
rating 2.9
2014-04-18 18:03:51
rating 4.2
2014-03-21 18:29:03
rating 4.8
2014-03-11 20:24:24
rating 2.3
2014-03-05 16:25:41
rating 5.3
2014-03-05 06:17:06
rating 5.6
2014-02-27 20:09:02
rating 5.1
2014-02-06 19:45:08
rating 5.5
2014-01-30 19:25:13
rating 4.7

2013

2013-12-18 16:20:00
rating 6
2013-12-11 15:43:36
rating 6
2013-12-10 17:03:49
rating 5.3
2013-12-09 18:50:05
rating 5.4
2013-11-16 17:48:07
rating 5.1
2013-10-25 18:17:35
rating 4.8
2013-10-16 15:43:29
rating 5.8
2013-10-01 16:50:07
rating 5.4
2013-09-19 16:49:51
rating 5.1
2013-09-18 18:07:40
rating 5.8
2013-09-13 17:03:19
rating 5.3
2013-09-09 18:58:03
rating 2.6
2013-09-06 17:48:32
rating 2.2
2013-09-05 16:20:46
rating 4.4
2013-08-29 20:32:15
rating 3.5
2013-08-26 16:11:52
rating 3.5
2013-08-12 16:31:06
rating 3.8
2013-08-07 19:39:06
rating 3.3
2013-08-03 17:10:28
rating 5.5
2013-07-08 21:58:44
rating 4.2
2013-05-29 18:40:27
rating 5.6
2013-05-13 17:59:50
rating 4.4
2013-05-04 20:14:42
rating 4.2
2013-04-23 17:03:53
rating 5.1
2013-04-12 16:43:04
rating 3.3
2013-04-08 06:26:20
rating 5.2
2013-04-05 19:43:32
rating 3.9
2013-03-25 14:48:52
rating 5.2
2013-03-20 18:56:34
rating 5.7
2013-02-20 19:19:11
rating 4.9
2013-02-20 18:08:49
rating 3.6
2013-02-16 16:11:07
rating 5.8
2013-02-06 16:50:29
rating 4.3

2012

2012-12-15 15:35:45
rating 5.3
2012-12-11 23:00:35
rating 5.4
2012-11-19 02:56:21
rating 5
2012-11-17 17:31:19
rating 3.3
2012-11-08 23:36:04
rating 3.1
2012-11-07 15:42:42
rating 5.4
2012-10-18 01:29:13
rating 3.7
2012-09-08 22:40:56
rating 4.8
2012-08-24 17:05:09
rating 4.2
2012-08-12 20:41:18
rating 2.9
2012-08-11 23:24:30
rating 5.3
2012-08-02 15:59:56
rating 4.2
2012-08-02 00:29:55
rating 5.1
2012-07-05 06:04:09
rating 1.6
2012-07-04 17:50:14
rating 3.7
2012-06-26 22:25:55
rating 1.9
2012-06-09 17:06:59
rating 5.1
2012-06-07 00:01:37
rating 5.4
2012-06-02 18:35:02
rating 5
2012-05-29 20:37:34
rating 4.5
2012-05-22 21:24:03
rating 4.5
2012-05-10 15:39:05
rating 2.4
2012-05-04 15:49:15
rating 4.4
2012-04-17 15:32:49
rating 5.1
2012-03-28 22:49:58
rating 4.7
2012-03-26 20:18:48
rating 2.5
2012-03-12 15:12:42
rating 5.7
2012-02-28 19:36:19
rating 5.4
2012-02-23 22:20:58
rating 3.4
2012-02-22 17:02:26
rating 2.5
2012-02-06 15:15:29
rating 3.1
2012-01-09 19:33:12
rating 3.6

2011

2011-12-15 07:22:41
rating 4.1
2011-12-06 22:58:53
rating 4.6
2011-11-22 00:11:22
rating 4
2011-11-21 22:32:19
rating 4.7
2011-10-21 22:05:02
rating 4.6
2011-10-15 23:32:24
rating 5.5
2011-08-08 21:15:17
rating 5.3
2011-07-05 15:49:10
rating 5.2
2011-04-07 02:11:14
rating 5.4
2011-03-02 20:33:08
rating 3.1
2011-02-28 20:44:52
rating 4
2011-02-13 23:33:50
rating 3.8
2011-01-18 22:15:58
rating 4.9

2010

2010-12-07 05:52:30
rating 3.4
2010-12-04 03:06:44
rating 3.4
2010-09-15 23:52:41
rating 4.6
2010-04-05 16:49:30
rating 5
2010-02-19 19:01:50
rating 3.7
2010-01-13 17:52:07
rating 3.7

2009

2009-12-23 21:38:22
rating 3.1
2009-12-12 23:22:04
rating 2.7
2009-12-10 17:38:57
rating 2.2
2009-11-21 19:30:00
rating 4.2
2009-10-13 19:32:48
rating 4
2009-09-02 20:02:22
rating 3.8
2009-08-21 23:32:57
rating 2.4
2009-08-19 17:02:27
rating 3.5
2009-07-28 19:09:03
rating 3.3
2009-05-20 17:38:32
rating 2.7
2009-05-14 20:49:15
rating 4.1
2009-05-12 18:14:16
rating 3.7
2009-05-02 06:17:51
rating 3.6
2009-04-03 22:17:01
rating 4.4
2009-03-18 17:39:30
rating 2.6
2009-02-06 19:16:08
rating 4.1
2009-01-09 16:39:08
rating 3

2008

2008-11-16 00:22:06
rating 3.2
2008-10-01 21:48:08
rating 3.8
2008-09-12 23:38:55
rating 4
2008-09-04 16:08:06
rating 4.3
2008-08-20 18:06:02
rating 4
2008-08-15 17:13:26
rating 3.5
2008-05-27 22:21:53
rating 3.3
2008-02-22 23:07:13
rating 3.3
2008-01-28 16:53:20
rating 4.2

2007

2007-11-21 17:50:42
rating 2.4
2007-10-19 22:11:31
rating 3.1
2014-04-18 18:03:51
13 votes, rating 4.2
A Dark Elf seeks Revenge and Redemption
Balatu is wandering aimleslly in a dark alley, looking for a back alley dive, he is constantly checking his note he has in his hand, looking for his destination. After 3 hours and having to back track 5 times he finally stands at the front door. The smell of roasting boar, the cries of laughter from the wenches inside and the smell of deep brown ale are pouring out. He takes a deep breath, one last smell of life and joy.

He opens up the door and the gloom overwhelms him. Only a few braziers are lit in the pub and the place is crowded. Thugs, hooligans, agitators and masters of the boot are all talking and having fun. The wenches are top notch which suprises Balatu for he would asume this dive would only get the hand me downs.

He approaches the bar and the bar keep at first just looks at him. Balatu is used to this from humans, their distrust of Dark Elfs runs deep as it should. Balatu opens up his coin sack and puts 2 crown on the counter top. The bar keep brings over a frost 60 oz mug of ale and grabs for the coin. Balatu's hand strikes faster than a cobra and holds his hand to the counter, looks him in the eye. "Iam here to see the Boz: Fresh off the Hellbound Road
. I know he hangs out here."

The bar keep returns his stare with nerves of steel and withdraws his hand and starts shinning a mug. Balatu produces 3 more crowns and stacks them on top of the other two.

"He is through that door in the back. I warn you darkie before you open that door to "steel" youself for your kind are not welcome in that place."

Balatu looks to the back of the pub and sees a iron door with massive reinforcements put around its frame. His elf sight can see runes of warding and protection around its frame. He can see the glowing purple symbol of Tzeentch on the door.

Balatu looks at the barkeep and gives him a nod and proceeds to the back of the pub. Stands in front of the door, drains the 60oz frosty in two gulps, grabs the door handle and opens it up and walks in before he losses his cool.

Balatu stands in awe as the door closes behind him. He stands on a plain of bone in the middle of a cobblestone road. The road leads to the horzion over a small hill. He looks the other way and sees not far off a road side house. Music is coming from that house. A deep dirge of malice of hate. He notices dried blood all over the road. Over turned carts and Chariots have been discarded on the side of the road. Skeletal remains litter the fields around the road, so many bones of the fallen. He walks with a purpose to the road side house and stops as he sees behind the house a forge. A large man stands beside the roaring forge sharpening 4 inch long spikes on a pair of dirty boots. The man stops when he senses the elf standing on the road. He gives him a look of contempt and goes back to work.

Balatu opens the door to the road side house and stands there for a moment taking in the scene. Over in the corner a demoneet of slaneesh is playing a harp, signing that hateful dirge. She looks up when he comes in and gives him a smile, her tounge lashes out and licks her fangs.

Balatu notices that there is a bar set up in the corner. Creatures of the famed Hell Bound road sit all over the room. Drinking and smoking but no body is speaking with each other. They all sit around enthralled by the dirge. Balatu approaches the bar and ask the men were he can find Boz, they point upstairs.

Balatu walks upstairs and hears the sound of human voices. Laughing and talking in a boastfull manner. He approaches the door and knocks. The door opens up and he is looking at the most beautiful red hair human women he has ever scene. She has almost no clothes on and her smile she gives him gives him a rise on the spot.


"Boz I think that guy you laid out two matches ago is standing out here. He looks a little pale and sickly actually."

"What did you say? Balatu is standing in the door. That poor sod who I rammed my boot through his skull? Well let him in and be a polite host."

Balatu walks in and sees 4 more outragously beautiful ladies hanging around in almost no clothes. Boz is sitting on sofa with a 60 OZ frosty in his hand. Eight norsmen and four men of the Empire all sit around talking and having fun with the ladies. Over in the corner is a large bar set up with a hobgoblin barkeep. He is polishing a stein and giving him a evil stare.

Boz is waving him over to take a seat. Yells at the Hob to get their guest a 80 oz frosty because he looks like he needs it.


"Balatu what brings you to my home away from home? Not sore about that dirty boot to the head I hope."

Balatu sits down and the Hob hands him his tall frosty, he takes a deep pull and then looks at Boz with those red eyes.

"Boz Iam not sore about our last meeting. Iam deeply offended and pissed off at coach Chainsaw. He denied my destiny of a glorious death on the pitch. The Apoth botched up once again because he is a cheap skate and cannot hire a good apoth like the Bucs. I was retired after I came back from my MNG because coach said I was a worthless PO/MB TV bloat with 2ST."

Balatu drains the 80 oz frosty in one gulp and throws the glass stein into the wall, it shatters into a thousand shards. He rasises his head to the heavens and lets out a mighty cry of revenge and damnation.

Boz just stares at Balatu for a moment and drains his mug. Waves over to the bar for another round. All the other men in the room go silent and very serious.


"Now that is the spirit man. I like that fire in your belly man. I agree with you that low life Chainsaw denied you of a glorious death by my boot and robbed me of a nice DP RIP. So what are you going to do about this man. Sit around here for a few days, sulk and get drunk, wake up every morning screaming to the heavens for redemption when you know none is forth coming? Wandering the Hellbound road is not your path man."

Balatu came here seeking his death by the boot of Boz. A glorious smack down on the Hellbound Road were he would die or defeat Boz and his soul could begin to heal but Boz is offering him another choice.

"Here is what Iam going to do Balatu, I got a soft spot for pissed off Dark Elfs who are looking for revenge."

Boz opens up a chest in the corner of his room. Pulls out a vile with some green ichor in it.

"I found this off some chump who thought he was hot stuff on the Hell Bound road. Turns out this vile is a lost forgotten relic of FUMBBL past. It turns out this stuff heals a player of all injuries and I got a feeling about you man.

Boz hands him the vile and stands back. Balatu looks at the vile and then at Boz. If he drinks this vile it his chance at redemption and salvation. A shot to decimate and destroy all of Chainsaws teams. But it will mean he owes Boz a debt and he hates owing debts to humans.

Balatu looks at Boz and he just nods his head. Balatu pops the vile in his mouth. Drinks deep and long, feels the magical power tingle through his body.

Boz steps forward and lets out a cry of joy and lifts Balatu off his feet.


"Hey Matthews we have a new DP to join our crew! I got a great feeling about this."

**************************************


Balatu the Dark Elf Dirty Boot is now on a mission to destroy all before him with his mighty boot. Show up coach Chainsaw for retiring him and his team. FUMBBL better look out because there is now a DP boot with some serious rage to kill all and send everybody to the RIP bin.

Balatu will be hired onto the Blood Sea Buccaneers after next match to begin his quest of DP domination.

***************************************

Devils with Red Eyes might have been retired but Balatu rises like a phoenix and I give the Devils a proper send off. Not some whine and moan blog we had to all suffer from.. :}








Rate this entry
Comments
Posted by Shades_SteelFist on 2014-04-18 20:13:11
Now this is the just made of pure awesome, although Nuffle will now prob bless him with constant doubles on every skill just to tempt you away from DP
Posted by the_Sage on 2014-04-18 21:06:29
Get him 4 SPPs and dauntless! =D
Posted by Rabe on 2014-04-18 21:33:52
\o/
Posted by Chainsaw on 2014-04-18 21:43:47
Awesome blog! Awesome kill!
Posted by fly on 2014-04-18 21:52:06
what team did balatu join in the end?
Posted by PaddyMick on 2014-04-19 10:11:04
I thought wow, 60oz in two gulps. Then I remembered American flow oz are smaller than European.