| # | Player Name | Position | Ma | St | Ag | Av | Player Skills | Inj | Cp | TD | Int | Cas | Mvp | SPP | Cost |
| 1 | Procrastination | Blitzer | 7 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block, Guard, Mighty Blow | | 1 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 1 | 17 | 90000 |
| 2 | Mistakes | Thrower | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Pass, Sure Hands, Safe Throw, Accurate | | 10 | 1 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 18 | 70000 |
| 3 | Lack of Training | Blitzer | 7 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block, Tackle | | 0 | 2 | 0 | 1 | 1 | 13 | 90000 |
| 4 | Incompetence | Thrower | 6 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Pass, Sure Hands, +AG, Accurate | n | 9 | 3 | 0 | 2 | 0 | 22 | 70000 |
| 5 | Idiocy | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 |   | | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 50000 |
| 6 | Cost Reducing Redundancies | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 |   | | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 50000 |
| 7 | Consulting | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 4 | 8 | Block, +AG | | 0 | 1 | 0 | 4 | 2 | 21 | 50000 |
| 8 | Cluelessness | Lineman | 5 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Guard | -ma | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 2 | 12 | 50000 |
| 10 | Uninterested | Lineman | 6 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block | | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 2 | 14 | 50000 |
| 11 | Unnecessary Red Tape | Blitzer | 7 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block | | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 90000 |
| 14 | Vindictive Pettiness | Blitzer | 8 | 3 | 3 | 8 | Block, +MA | | 0 | 2 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 15 | 90000 |
| 15 | Watercooler Politics | Catcher | 8 | 2 | 3 | 7 | Catch, Dodge | | 0 | 0 | 0 | 0 | 1 | 5 | 70000 |
| 16 | Sheer Bloody-Mindedness | Ogre | 5 | 5 | 2 | 9 | Mighty Blow, Thick Skull, Bone Head, Throw Team Mate, Big Guy, Guard | | 0 | 0 | 0 | 2 | 1 | 9 | 120000 |
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| Team Name: | Demotivated | Re-Rolls: | 4 |
| Race: | Human | Fan Factor: | 8 |
| Team Rating: | 160 | Assistant Coaches: | 0 |
| Treasury: | 40000 | Cheerleaders: | 0 |
| Coach: | nonchalance | Apothecary: | Yes |
| | | Team Wizard: | No |