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MenonaLoco



Joined: Jan 05, 2016

Post   Posted: Jun 29, 2019 - 20:53 Reply with quote Back to top

Hey hey, i know, i know, you are all waiting for our trophy snatching frog Grue to come back from Cancun/Bahamas/Cayman/George Town in order to play against Doofr's Delfs in the divisional round, so we may finally see our NFC conference final - Relezite's Vamps are waiting for dat frog or delf for weeks by now. Mrt1212 is waiting already for their SB opponent (grats mrt for your second shot at the trophy)...

While i was waiting, an urgent question disturbed my mind: How on earth did Doofr's delfs get past Stimme's High elves, the Glams. The glams that did their sexy moves against my goats to keep me out of playoffs. The same glams who 2d uphill BH'd my warrior in order to do their OTS. Aaaarrrrggghhhhh So, how on earth did that happen? I thought they would go far, conference finals, SB, right? I am sure, you thought so too. So, i checked the replay of the divisional round Doofr vs. Stimme and i found out (https://fumbbl.com/p/match?id=4070851).


First Half:
1 - Pitch invasion, 5 Glams down, 3 Deviants. Looks like a bad start for Stimme.
But he gets the ball, hids it behind 2 pixels, while Doofr fouls, breaks armor, but gets sent off. Good deal for the glams.
2 - Stimme, finally with most of his pixels available, starts his slow dance to the left, Doofr gets in front of him. No removals.
3 - Glams' QB falls back, while rest of the team stays around the center, maximizing blocks. Doofr ends his turn on a double skull.
4 - Stimme makes full use of Bo Galanté - new star player - dodging and gfi-ing into position to assist an additional 2d block. Doofr stands a Blitzer up, stays in surfable position.
5 - Stimme surfs. First foul of the game does nothing. Bo Galanté in scoring position. Doofr ignores Bo Galanté, since it's obvious that Glams want a 8t drive.
6- Bo Galanté falls back and then gets blitzed. Interesting diving tacklers preventing stuff on both teams.
7 - First time the glam's cage enters the opponent's half with a last second right swing. Doofr gets in his way.
8 - Stimme cannot break through that defense around the cage, so he gets out through the back door, passes to the only open lino, who hands off to the marked blitzer, but no problem, elf-shits his way out of this. 1-0.
8 - Doofr does no OTS. Why? :open_mouth:
Second half:
1 - Another 1st turn foul by Doofr. No removals, no ref call. Stimme does a gfi in order to maximize blocks and in order to inprision 3 deviants.
2 - Deviants break the prision, 1 helf goes BH. Glams try to respond, a nice gang foul only breaks armour.
3 - Deviants cannot advance a bit, Glams send their ag5 blitzer around the corner to 1d blitz their ball carrier. But snake.
4 - Now on the sideline, the deviants dirty player tries to gang foul the ag5 helf, but doesn't even break his armour.
5 - Doofr tries to get rid off any of the 2 star players: blitzes Bo Galanté and fouls Eldril - just to get sent off. 1 cage corner was in contact, Glams hack their way through, to the ball carrier, 1d blitz, dump off. Both work: carrier down, ball in hands of the witch Ndamukung Sue.
6 - Double skull, reroll! Suddenly 2 armours break on the right side and the deviants are able to advance well on that side. Glams try to get in their way.
7 - Again, Doofr's 1st block a double skull. Reroll is good. Still ends up in a bad spot. Glams get the open 1d blitz on the ball - only a push.
8 - The witch does a funny frenzy vs. sidestepper - blitz to break free and score. 1-1.
8 - Glams fail their OTS. Where were those dice when they pulled off their maximum BS against me?

Overtime:
Delfs get the ball. To not let them score in turn 8 is already difficult, but to not let them score at all, well... Deviants go left, Stimme gets in their way.
Deviants change to the right side and build a weird cage thingy: The Helf ag5 blitzer marked by a diving tackler, the ball next to that diving tackler, and another blitzer next to the ball. Very unstable, but dump off allows you to do this kind of thing, i guess.
Glams Blitz the Sue-witch and get 2 blodgestep-diving tacklers in contact with the ball.
Not that it matters, ball carrier is ag6 and walks out of this "trap" with a 2+. (ag6 is broken! it's OP! it breaks the game!)
Deviants position themselves on the left again. Again the Glams try to get in their way., but it's too tough: a simple blitz and a 2d block free the other runner up, handoff.... wait! ohhhh it's a snake. Glams get the ball out of there and take a strong position near the corner of their own endzone. And then.... REKOKHEL OKWARA!!! 1d-leap blitz-pows the ball. Ndamukong jumpup blocks and ends up with the ball between her and the sideline. Glams push on ball, scatter goes to Eldril, who catches it. And then.... JARED the Hassle ag5 helf blitzer f*cks it up, double skulls, no rerolls left. Deviants' Givreth Smith double pows Eldril.
In the end Jeremy Maclin, the ag6 runner just walks in there, and throws the game winner in tackle zone, over a high elf... Ughhhh what a BS.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j3rwKl267gE

Jeremy Maclin dancing to that song during in the after game party....
Give me the ball, I'll hit the game winner
Baby, don't you give up on me
(Give me the ball)
I'll hit the game winner
(Take a chance on me)
Baby, believe in me
(Give me the ball)
I'll hit the game winner
(Take a chance on me)
Baby believe in me
Take a chance on me
Take a chance on me
Time out baby
'Cause this is where I make my money, baby
I'm not afraid
I'm not afraid
We've been down before
(We've been down before)
What you wanna do?
(What you wanna do?)
Five seconds left
You go right this time
Right then and then you found me open
Baby, I'm your guy
Give me the ball
I'll hit the game winner
Baby don't you give up on me
(Give me the ball)
I'll hit the game winner
(Take a chance on me)
Baby believe in me
(Give me the ball)
I'll hit the game winner
(Take a chance on me)
Baby baby baby baby, don't leave me
(Give me the ball)
Don't give up, I'll hit it, baby
I'll hit it, baby
All you gotta do is never give up on me
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