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Location: Noo Orleenz
Nickname: Aintz
Stadium: Dirt Bowl
Surface: Let's just call it dirt

Colors: Gold and black (when visible beneath dirt and blood)
Sponsor: Noo Orleenz Coal. Premium Goblin Coal*
(* At least 5% coal. May contain dirt, sawdust, sand, toenails, cardboard. WARNING: not safe for anyone allergic to chickens)
Rivals: Not good enough to have any


TEAM BIO


Noo Orleenz is a small, mean goblin settlement situated between a crocodile- and midge-infested swamp, and a filthy coal mine on the southern slopes of the Badlands. Mine-owner Big Chief Sitting Duck decided to put the place on the map by investing his paltry earnings into a new Blood Bowl team. Imaginatively named 'Noo Orleenz Bludd Bowul Teem', they are disparagingly known as the 'Aintz' amongst the wider greenskin community... 'cos dey aint nevva gonna win nuffink!'

TROPHY ROOM

Hahahahaha, you actually clicked that?

TEAM & PLAYER RECORDS

TopName#
Games
Fungus
72
Completions (9)
Fungus
Bozo
2
Touchdowns (101)
Puck da Luck
Scuzz
12
Interceptions (0)
Casualties (133)
Bozo
38
Most Valuable Player (73)
Boggo le Gobbo
9
Star Player Points (205)
Whirling Wilf
24
Passing (14)
Scuzz
5
Rushing (2054)
Scuzz
300
Blocks (2278)
Fungus
450
Fouls (315)
Boggo le Gobbo
146
Scoring Thrower
Slippery Sam
Scuzz
Fungus
Boggit McBogface
Turd
Zitty Zit Zit-Zit
1
Blocking Thrower
Fungus
Bozo
2
Blocking Scorer
Puck da Luck
8
Triple
Scuzz
Fungus
1
All-rounder


PLAYERS

You want to know about Aintz players? Seriously? How long have you got? I mean let's face it, if Big Chief Sitting Duck had not written 'Bludd Bowul Teem' on the paperwork he'd probably be in court accused of genocide (rather than just slavery, theft, arson and racketeering... goblin mine ownership is a complicated business after all). Oh ok, if you must - how about these then...

Stumpel Riltskin - Goblin Lineman and original Captain of the Aintz. Miraculously returned the ball the entire length of the pitch on his very first reception, on the first play of the Aintz' first game, evading hordes of humans while the trolls picked their noses/looked bemusedly at their new shoulder pads and the Apothecary was already trying to remove Bazza's chainsaw from his rectum*. A touchdown that will go down forever in Aintz folklore!

Whirling Wilf - Star Fanatic. Most fans who come to Aintz games want to see Whirling Wilf, the greatest Fanatic Star of all time in the Competitive division. He may be a dizzy little mushroom-fogged maniac, but he has developed tremendous leg and arm muscles. These give long spins that can completely skittle opposing lines of whoever is bold enough to stand up there, leaving a pile of fodder for the following boots and spikes... when he goes the right way of course!

* his own rectum unfortunately.

*** Did you know...

Recognising that the only, remote chance of the Aintz scoring a touchdown is often closely tied to goblin aerodynamics, Big Chief Sitting Duck conducted a big experiment on helmet shapes. After getting the trolls to hurl 100 goblins with either square or pointy helmets, and recording 100% mortality in both study groups, he concluded that it 'dunt reely matta innit'. Although it might have been an idea to conduct the experiment OUTSIDE the mine...

Did you ALSO know:

It has come to the attention of the management that fans have been complaining about the Aintz throwing 3.2 gratuitous fouls per match in their first five games. On behalf of all Aintz staff we would like to apologise deeply, humbly and unreservedly about the despicable conduct of our players. We have taken the following immediate actions to rectify this deplorable situation:

- all players will now have their boots fitted with Orcidas 4" stainless steel 'Bear-Killa' spikes;
- any player guilty of not making a foul in a game will have 10,000 Volts applied to his testicles in the next 'teem bildin' session;
- the previous Fouling Coach has been fired - from a large cannon towards Bozo the troll, who was not previously fed for a week, and in front of all the players to teach them about the consequences of failure*

We thank fans for their patience and pledge that Aintz behaviour on the pitch will deteriorate hugely in our next games.

* It must be said quite a few of the players were rather non-plussed by this spectacle, claiming that they were experts in failure already. However team morale was improved massively.



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Bio template by Balle2000. Helmet templates by Thom_Darkness.



New Team Page Beta
Player Ma St Ag Pa Av Skills Inj G Cp Td It Cs Mvp SPP Cost  
1
Goblin Lineman
6 2 3+ 4+ 8+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
  3 0 0 0 0 0 0/18 40k
(40+0)k
 
2
Goblin Lineman
6 2 3+ 4+ 8+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
  3 0 0 0 0 0 0/18 40k
(40+0)k
 
3
Fanatic
4 7 3+ - 8+
Ball & Chain, No Hands, Secret Weapon, Stunty
Mighty Blow, Block, Sure Feet, +MA
n, n 68 0 0 0 29 8 24/32 190k
(70+120)k
 
4
Goblin Lineman
7 2 3+ 5+ 9+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
Strip Ball, Block, +AV, +MA
-pa, n 71 0 12 0 8 4 2/32 110k
(40+70)k
 
5
Goblin Lineman
6 2 3+ 4+ 8+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
  1 0 0 0 0 0 0/18 40k
(40+0)k
 
6
Goblin Lineman
6 2 3+ 4+ 8+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
Tackle
  5 0 1 0 0 1 1/20 60k
(40+20)k
 
7
Goblin Lineman
6 2 3+ 4+ 8+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
  7 0 0 0 0 0 0/18 40k
(40+0)k
 
8
Goblin Lineman
6 2 3+ 5+ 8+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
-pa 5 0 1 0 0 1 7/18 40k
(40+0)k
 
9
Bomma
6 2 3+ 4+ 8+
Bombardier, Dodge, Secret Weapon, Stunty
  4 0 0 0 0 0 0/18 45k
(45+0)k
 
10
Looney
6 2 3+ - 8+
Chainsaw, Secret Weapon, Stunty
  41 0 0 0 0 4 16/18 40k
(40+0)k
 
11
Trained Troll
5 5 5+ 5+ 10+
Always Hungry, Loner, Mighty Blow, Projectile Vomit, Really Stupid, Regeneration, Throw Team-mate
Block, Pro, +MA, Guard
  67 2 0 0 41 5 26/32 235k
(115+120)k
 
12
Goblin Lineman
6 2 3+ 4+ 8+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
Dirty Player
  9 0 3 0 0 1 7/20 60k
(40+20)k
 
13
Goblin Lineman
6 2 3+ 4+ 9+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
Dirty Player, Sneaky Git, +AV
n, n 65 0 4 0 2 9 14/28 90k
(40+50)k
 
14
Trained Troll
4 5 6+ 5+ 10+
Always Hungry, Loner, Mighty Blow, Projectile Vomit, Really Stupid, Regeneration, Throw Team-mate
Block, Dodge, Pro, Strong Arm
-ag 76 2 1 0 30 2 1/32 255k
(115+140)k
 
15
Goblin Lineman
6 2 3+ 4+ 8+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
  3 0 1 0 0 0 3/18 40k
(40+0)k
 
16
Goblin Lineman
6 2 3+ 4+ 8+
Dodge, Right Stuff, Stunty
Wrestle
  18 0 2 0 1 1 6/20 60k
(40+20)k
 
16 players Badlands Brawl, Underworld Challenge, Bribery and Corruption
Coach: BigChiefSittingDuck Re-Rolls (120k): 3  
Race: Goblin Dedicated Fans: 2  
Current Team Value: 1615k Assistant Coaches: 0  
Treasury: 75k Cheerleaders: 0  
Team Value: 1615k Apothecary: Yes  
Games this Season: 77 / 15 Current Re-draft Budget: 1350k

Games Played:77 (40/10/27) |TD Diff:22 (102 - 80) |Cas Diff:-26 (82/93/18 - 132/65/22)
Last Opponent: Blood Collectors For Karrash