| Poll |
| KPL |
| Oh, yeah, Iam in. |
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46% |
[ 70 ] |
| Iam outta here |
|
17% |
[ 26 ] |
| PIE: is this a pointless poll or what? |
|
36% |
[ 54 ] |
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| Total Votes : 150 |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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 Posted:
Apr 29, 2014 - 16:23 |
 
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KPL Morning Update
The sun rises in the East, the first rays of the new day reach Khemri City. The birds are singing their morning songs and the sounds of a city awakening from a long night can be heard all over the city.
Rah-Ma rises from his bed, his morning meal all ready laid out by his servants on the table. He walks over and opens up the Tome of NUFFLE and reads a few pages of its wisdom. He then sits down at the table, drinking the necter and eating the berries.
That was when the great cry of pain, dismay and a great lamentation could be heard across the city. He rushes over to his balacony and looks towards the palace gate.
Coach Synn and Miyuso are being confronted by Tomb King Settra outside the palace.
Rah-Ma dashes for the door. Hoping beyond hope that he can stay the hand of Settra.....................
The gory details will be coming out shortly. |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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| Posted:
Apr 29, 2014 - 16:52 |
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Well, things for the Charnel Valley Black Shields are looking bleak indeed. But nice for our opponents. Another bunch of failed regen rolls and have a look at the way the squad stands after 2 games!
Charnel Valley Black Shields have 8 fit players. And a niggler now!
This was the game against Ka-Sabar blacksmiths. We failed to pick up the ball 5 times and therefore in reality did not hold possession of the ball until turn 7 of the second half thanks to a touchback! A real beatdown. Still, props to Nablah. Was a true gentleman throughout the match and we had a good chat. Well done mate!
Also, I am taking nothing away from my erstwhile opponent. He played a really good game and deserved his win. No complaints here!
Also, 2 fouls for the game with two players sent off and no injuries resulting. A Nablah stated, we drew the only ref in Khemri who can read and had read the rules of the game. What a killjoy!
Anyway, one thing is for sure, the only way is up! |
_________________
"Gallifrey falls no more"
Do your part! Join the Adoption Agency NOW! |
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Nablah
Joined: Nov 14, 2012
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| Posted:
Apr 29, 2014 - 17:01 |
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Indeed it was the kind of game that is relaxing when you are on the right side of the fence and that is just furstrating on the other side.
The first half was ok but then in the second DrPoods failed, failed and failed... and he couldn't play his drive. At least we had a nice chat.
I hope you get better dice next time! |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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| Posted:
Apr 29, 2014 - 17:12 |
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Oh yeah!
If anyone feels sorry for themselves ever, they can watch the replay 
But it was still a lot of fun. Good luck for the rest of the season mate. Any time!  |
_________________
"Gallifrey falls no more"
Do your part! Join the Adoption Agency NOW! |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 29, 2014 - 18:19 |
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Rah-Ma dashes through the front gates of the palace and runs into a wall of onlookers. He is yelling for them to move and clear a path but it seems like it takes an eternity to move forward. He is almost through the press of people when he hears a cry of pain and anquish. "Display him on the palace gate!"
Rah-ma curses Settra for eliminating another KPL coach. As he his pressing through the onlookers cheer and start chanting Settra's name. Above the heads of the crowd he can see Coach Synn crying out in pain as his crucified body is raised above the masses. Blood is dripping from his hands and feet, his face has been smashed and his nose broken, 6 missing teeth and his clothes dangle on him like rags.
The crowd parts infront of Rah-Ma and he stands his ground as 4 tomb guardians are carrying the pole that Synn is impaled onto. They are marching towards the wall of Woe were all of Settra's victims dangle until death.
Rah-Ma digs in his heels, he is going to stand up to these TG bullies, show them what a priest of NUFFLE can do and then next thing he knows he is flying into the masses. He has lost a sandle and his ribs are bruised badly.
As Rah-ma was standing his ground one of the Tomb Guardians, who obviously did not know who Rah-ma was, gave him a back handed smash and sent him cartwheeling in the air for 10 ft.
Rah-Ma stands up and looks to the wall of woe. High above the ruckus a winch is lowered from the top and attached to the crucifix. Coach Synn is hoisted 20 feet in the air and he just dangles there. Yelling in pain, then passing out and then awakening moaning in pain.
Rah-Ma is grabbed by his robes and turned around. He looks up and Settra is standing behind him, looking up at Coach Synn.
"Rah-Ma that was a bold move standing your ground in front of my guards. You are lucky they had on their kid gloves or else you would be dead right now. Coach Synn has let me down so I had to exact my revenge on him."
"And what mighty sin did Synn commit my Lord."
"Well he was hemming and hawing about real life issues, some paternity test coming up, a mistress who was trying to blackmail him and just bored me with all his complaining about life outside the KPL. So I solved his problem for him."
Rah-ma looks at the crucified body of Synn and then at Settra and then at the masses cheering this all on. Rah-ma finds himself in a world gone mad.
"That was the best solution for coach Synn's problems?"
Settra's smile fades and he gives Rah-ma that penetrating gaze
"Dont go soft on me Rah-ma, Khemri does not suffer the fools or the soft for long. Synn had gone foolish and soft on me and I cannot have that in the KPL."
Settra turns his attention back to the crowd
"Now it is time to deal with Miyuso"
Rah-ma follows in Settra's foot steps and approaches the well that is in front of the palace gate. A city land mark that agitators and protesters have used for generations to air their complaints.
Settra and Rah-ma stand at the edge of the circle of onlookers as Coach Miyuso is standing on top of the well. His clothes have been stripped away and all he has on is a loin cloth. He has inflicted huge wounds in his chest and back and is bleeding all over. In his right hand he has a 7 chain flail and in the other he is holding a copy of the Tome of NUFFLE. He is a KPL flagellant of DOOM!!!!
Rah-ma does not like the looks of this and is deeply offended that Miyuso would be holding a sacred tome and defiling it for he can see pages have been ripped out of it.
"My Lord did coach Miyuso rip out pages of the Holy Text and use it as a butt wipe?"
Settra lets out a laugh and then gets serious
"Yes he did Rah-ma. Miyuso has been on a good ole fashion rant for the last hour. I have to say Iam very impressed with some of his props he has used to make his point.
Miyuso! Have you run out of hot air yet? Running out of words to say? You are starting to bore the crowd and once they become bored, well, then you know what will happen."
Miyuso spits at Settra and then sees that Rah-ma is standing there. He gives Rah-Ma a wicked smile and takes in a deep breath.
"There he is citizens of Khemri, the vile priest of NUFFLE, the one who is leading us all astray!!! He shuns the old gods and wants us to bow infront of a bastard child of the Ruinious powers!!!!! Worship them and invite bad luck into our hearts!!!
He has formed up a league that is in just and just not fair. The necro and undead powers are to much to overcome!!! OP league balance and the fact that my team was sorley out matched in TV is a crime!!!!
The power of the Vampires to the East is rising!!!! That is why I forfeited my last two matches against them!!! The pressence of the blood suckers is a violation of all that is holy!!!!
Miyuso rips some more pages from the tome and lifts up his thong and proceeds to wipe, making eye contact with Rah-ma the entire time.
"My Lord, I have become bored with all of this."
"Wait for it Rah-ma, I think he is coming to his grand finale."
Miyuso looks at the crowd and raises his voice on high.
"Rah-ma is the problem with the KPL. His league structure, his rigid demands on scheduling will be the downfall of the KPL. The KPL is CF'D to the point of no return and any coach who remains in the KPL is insane, for the league is stacked against them with no chance for victory. The poor lowly Khemri teams will forever wander the desert in this league, destined for only pain and suffering as the low down necro, undead and vamps claim all the glory.
It is all because of you Rah-ma, you lap dog of Settra and priest of a vile God of bad luck."
Rah-ma turns and leaves. His heart has gone black and cold.
Settra watches him walk off and senses the change in Rah-ma. That is good Settra thinks to himself, I need men with a cold heart to stand by my side.
He turns back to Miyuso and takes a few steps forward.
He is clapping and smilling as he approaches.
"That was a epic display of agitation Miyuso. Last time a man with such skill at oratory prowess was priest Su-Mu-da. I believe it was 1200 years ago almost to this day he stood right here and I had to silence such a gifted man."
Settras arm strikes out faster than a chetah at full sprint, grabs the 7 chain flail and reaches back and with all the force of Tomb King Settras mighty strength he strikes.
The crowd goes silent. Miyuso is standing there with a shocked look on his face. 7 lines, pouring blood run down his body from his shoulders to his groin. He stands there for a moment in time and then falls apart into 7 slices. His body explodes in gore, blood and intestines and then he falls into the well.
The crowd stands still for a moment and then explodes in cheers!!!!
Settra turns around slowly, taking in the gazes from his citizens. He is covered from head to toe in blood and gore. The 7 chain fail dangles from his hand, blood dripping into the sand, the sand is soaking it all up, a morning shower of blood for the dry sand of Khemri.
The crowd, all as one fall to one knee and raise their voices to the heavens...SETTRA!!!!
He walks back to the palace, his footsteps marked by a trail of blood. Settra stands at the palace gates and takes one last look at coach Synn.
Stops next to one of the the royal guards.
"I give coach Synn a over/under of 1 and half days before he dies, he is weak."
The Guard looks up at coach Synn and then at Settra
"I will take that bet, I think he has the willpower to defy you for 3 days."
Settra chuckles and keeps walking to the palace doors. He will be collecting that money very shortly he thinks on that bet. |
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Comish of the: |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 29, 2014 - 23:16 |
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KPL afternoon update
Forfeits have been handed down, League standing points up to date.
All four tournaments have close battles for the final 3 spots and 2 of them we still have no clue on what is going to happen in the closing rounds.
Win or go home is the mantra of the day in the KPL as we come down the home stretch of the KPL regular season. |
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Comish of the: |
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Rabe
Joined: Jun 06, 2009
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| Posted:
Apr 29, 2014 - 23:43 |
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With so many coaches... gone... Will there be Necromantic slots available again? I know I said I would play Vampires, but I might reconsider (since I'd still love to have a wolf with hypno-gaze..). |
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pythrr
Joined: Mar 07, 2006
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| Posted:
Apr 29, 2014 - 23:54 |
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Spooge McChasey howls "SETTRA!!!!" |
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Nablah
Joined: Nov 14, 2012
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| Posted:
Apr 30, 2014 - 12:25 |
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I guess it's payback time... after yesterday's game aganist DrPoods where everything went as smoothly as possible. Today was revenge day against Sonrises' Lahmia Black Souls. After being bitten 3-1 in the pre-season games The blacksmiths were up of rematch.
Here are the Black Souls in short two over-powered MA8 blodging might-blow werewolves, block for everyone and as native specs 4 AG3 guys and AV8 or more only. This just doesn't look like a piece of cake! But the blacksmith have faith in Nuffle and trust that those fleshy guys are going to get kicked!
That didn't quite worked out this way.
Hackenslash was called for help and stayed 1 turn on the pitch, missed is block and got KOed the following turn.
Second half the crown invaded the pitch: 7 Khemris out vs 3 undead.
The struggle was intense and the frustration high. The Blacksmtihs tried everything, they threw 57 blocks, fouled a bit, even tried to dodge sometimes, went for it. Nothing worked. The KO were coming back on the other side, the foulers were being banned and the blockers got stunned (a tomb guardian even died).
Today was just not our day...  |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 30, 2014 - 17:35 |
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KPL Coaches meeting
League changes for season #3
Ok, coaches, listen up and listen up good. Here are the changes to the KPL that will go effect starting with the Season #3 draft and the regular season.
The KPL is never static and Settra is always looking for new ways to improve the KPL and make it stronger and more fun to play in. He feels that the KPL has not found its grove yet so he has issued these changes. He is still looking for that perfect format.
Here we go
1)The format for the regular season will be changed. KPL will stick with using the round robin format. We will get rid of the divisonal aspect to the KPL. That caused confusion for a lot of coaches.
The KPL will still be split between the NFC and the KFC. There will be 16 teams in each conference, hopefully, and maybe more, do not know. But regardless each conference will be set up in one massive round robin tournament. The regular season will consist of 12 games. The tournaments will be set up. It will consist of 15 rounds because of the round robin format.
The first 3 rounds I will go in and forfeit all the matches, no standing points will be aquired. So every team will start their regular season play in round 4 of the tournament. This also means that you will not face 3 teams in the conference that season.
The reason for this is very simple...15 rounds is to much for most coaches to handle. I have found that 10-12 is a good number in league play.
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2)Racial restrictions: In each conference the racial mix will be broken down like this.
Necro: 2 teams MAX
Undead: 2 teams MAX
Vampire: 4 teams MAX
Khemri: Unlimited
** Grandfathered Necro and Undead may take those numbers over the limit, Grandfathered teams are classified as teams who entered the KPL in season #1 **
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3) Playoff format will not be changed. It will be the top 6 teams each in each conference moving on to the KPL playoffs which is a 6 team seeded format KO tournament. Top 2 teams get a BYE in week one.
********************************
4) KPL draft is coming up and here is how we are going to do this this year. We will still use a draft list but we will pick players in groupings.
The draft groupings will be set up like this.
#1-5
#6- 10
#11- 15
#16- 20
#21- 25
#26-32
So how it will work is the first group will start the draft. The #1 to #5 teams will start out. I will send out a PM to all those coaches and they will tell me or use their draft sheet to pick players. I will then amend the sheet so all the coaches can see who has been picked. Then the next group, #6-#10 will go next, PM will be sent out to that group, those coaches will pick or use draft sheets, the list will be amended and then the next group will pick.
Last years draft had one serious weakness. It was trully a blind draft. By allowing coaches to draft in groups it gives you an idea of what players are getting picked up and you can amend on the fly as the draft proceeds. It gives you more control over which players you would like to pick up.
Now the weakness of this new way of drafting is that it requires coaches to be active and aware of what is going on. That is why it will be important to make draft sheets in case you are one of those coaches who just does not care to respond to the KPL on what player you will pick up. I will have a master ranking sheet so that will be the default rankings in case a coach goes AWOL or does not really care what player he picks up.
Right now Iam thinking that each grouping will have 2 days to make up their mind before I use the master ranking sheet or the coaches draft sheet, if I have a copy, to make the pick.
We will start the draft once the playoffs commence.
The draft board will be coming out very shortly.
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5) Preseason action
Each team will be allowed one click through match. It must be against a KPL team or against the KPL scrubb team if you cannot find another coach beside myself who runs the scrubb team. Start the match and just click through.
KPL will set up a preseaon open round robin tournament for new teams and teams that are, lets call it, struggling. It will be all the new teams and teams that are under TV 1400. They will be entered into this open round robin for you to attempt to get in some matches. This tournament will run for 2-3 weeks. It is totally up to the coaches in the preseason tournement to find and arrange these matches. IF at the end of a preaseason match you go over 1500 TV you are done for the preseason and must wait for the start of the regular season.
The preseason tournament will run whille the post season is going on.
There will be no optional rules enabled for the preseason matches and no OT.
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On a final note Tomb King Settra will be having a open forum discussion about league issues with so many coaches crying to mama about this team is OP and that team is OP and why is my team not OP?
That discussion will happen in the forums (a new KPL forum thread will be made for this) and we will discuss any possible changes. Settra is a hard man to convince to change his ways but atleast you can tell him what you think and not lose your head. |
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Comish of the: |
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Beerox
Joined: Feb 14, 2008
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| Posted:
Apr 30, 2014 - 19:04 |
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If that was confusing, we have a serious IQ problem around here.
Rivalries are cool. |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 30, 2014 - 19:10 |
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| Beerox wrote: | If that was confusing, we have a serious IQ problem around here.
Rivalries are cool. |
All issues related to season #3 are up for discussion once Settra holds his open court forum to talk about all these issues. |
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Comish of the:
Last edited by PainState on %b %30, %2014 - %19:%Apr; edited 1 time in total |
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m0gw41
Joined: Jun 12, 2012
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| Posted:
Apr 30, 2014 - 19:13 |
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How is the draft order decided? Is it like American Handegg where the poorest performing team from the season before gets first pick or is it random? |
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PainState
Joined: Apr 04, 2007
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| Posted:
Apr 30, 2014 - 19:15 |
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| m0gw41 wrote: | | How is the draft order decided? Is it like American Handegg where the poorest performing team from the season before gets first pick or is it random? |
All the new teams are first to draft, then the returning KPL teams fill in with the worst KPL team from last season drafting first of the returning KPL teams and the team with the best KPL regular season standing drafts last. |
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Comish of the: |
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DrPoods
Joined: Nov 14, 2013
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| Posted:
May 01, 2014 - 17:50 |
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I think I get worst team, lowest TV and New...
Hmmm. Looking forward to the draft sheet!!  |
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Do your part! Join the Adoption Agency NOW! |
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