And so I start the chronicling... (chronicling? ... that doesn't sound right! *cough*) ... of my rise to power!

The Aknot, Wot have played their first game and picked up a draw against the bloodthirsty, savage elves Blue Phoenix, coached by ix77. With hatred and cruelty in their eyes, those vile elfs put the lovable "he thinks he's orcs" Skinny-limbed Butterjockey (Goblin) out for the match.

This whipped the orcs into a fervor where they forgot all about the ball and went on an elf-pummeling spree, but despite their best efforts, and the bloodiest knuckles the pitch has ever seen, those canned up High Elfs held up against the barrage. Only two orcs followed the coaches commands. The tenacious Baby-lipped Jackbomb who dodged and weaved through charging, rampaging orcs and stumbling, tumbling elfs before being tackled in rotten fashion by a lucky Elf Blitzer who kept out of the carnage and even managed to dishonorably sneak one past the noble Pug-nosed Pipejuggler that kept his cool and defended the touchdown zone while his brothers in bowl went berserk.

Perhaps next time, the orcs will taste blood for the first time. Perhaps next time, the orcs shall remember the ball until the whistle blows. Perhaps next time, their efforts shall bear more fruit. Alas, it was not this day.