“Somewhere in a barren wilderness located deep in the heart of Castle Ivoryskull(TM) a press conference of unearthly proportions is about to take place.

[Applause]

SeraphimRed: Merci beaucoup!

Reporter who gets straight to the point to stage today’s joke theme: Mr Red. Do you feel a bit of a loser playing in the Championship?

SeraphimRed: HOW DARE YOU! YOU %$^&@~ £$%*@~$ great #&%@ wad! Why I ought to tear your %&$ hole and shove Russo’s head up it!

...
...

SeraphimRed: I’m sorry. I’m sorry please pardon my French, the month of Octobre brings out the worst in me. That question has rather backed me into a cul-de-sac. I’m not happy to be playing in the Championship this season, as you all know, this is the first time in eight seasons that myself and my legion of zombies have contested in a division other than the Premiership. I’m pretty sure though that yesterday’s performance proved that we are en route to return to the top flight.

Reporter #2: Mr Red. How are you finding the Championship compared to the Premiership?

SeraphimRed: Well, it’s not all that different. Yesterday had a strong sense of déjà vu for instance, playing the same team that we concluded season seven against. Then of course there’s that cretin, Gritter and his Mummies, which seem to follow me everywhere. In fact as I was chauffeur driven here earlier I could have sworn he was following me!

And then, there are some significant differences that this à la carte of opponents offer. For instance, it’s a lot less Green around here – and I’m not just talking Orcs... I’m yet to be singed by a 30second fireball!

Reporter #3: So, an early win for Real, how do you think it went?

SeraphimRed: Moi?

Reporter #3: Yes.

SeraphimRed: Well, despite the referee trying to sabotage my whole game plan, sending my players off, two for two, in some sort of Vendetta against us...

Reporter #4: That’s Italian.

SepherimRed: Really?

Reporter #4: Yep.

SepherimRed: Sacrebleu! Anyway, despite refereeing behaviour that would be considered as nothing but a faux pas in the Premiership we battled on through a mêlée of foulness. The coup de grâce came when we forced the strangers to score earlier and replied in the dead of the first half despite their Beasts’ best efforts. It is a great start for us and one we hope to build upon in our next game.

Viva la Sociedead and au revoir!

Xxx
A good game against Krytie to add to our plethora of others. There was a lot of failed actions throughout the game, blocks, dodges, GFIs, and I’m sure it could have been very different.

I now just hope he takes RSC on his Claw Beastman to dice up Gritter’s Skellies xD

”