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Match Result · League division
Match recorded on 2011-03-08 00:05:51
70k
3/0/0
Player Performances
td
comp
cas
int
mvp
spp
turns
pass
rush
block
foul
TOTALS
1
-
1
-
1
10
-
-
29
36
4
#8 Carlos Bocanegra – Broken Jaw (MNG)
Player Performances
td
comp
cas
int
mvp
spp
turns
pass
rush
block
foul
TOTALS
1
-
3
-
1
14
-
-
25
45
3
“The scene opens up in the offices of Real Sociedead.
The assistant enters holding the magical up-to-the-minute-updates team sheets for Real and Fulham, shaking his head as he peruses them.
Assis.: This is bad.
Sera: What is?
Assis.: We’re 50 points better than Fulham.
Sera: That sounds good to me.
Assis.: No. It means we’re giving away two handicaps.
Sera: Two what now?
Assis.: Two handicaps, to even the game?
Sera.: I don’t understand?
Assis.: To even the game out we have to give away handicaps.
Sera: O...K... you mean like in Golf?
Assis.: Sort of...
Sera: So do we have to start 1 TD down then?
Assis.: Not quite. These handicaps are more like getting our players wrongly arrested, bribing the referee or knee capping a few of our guys.
Sera: That seems extreme.
Assis.: It’s a tough sport.
Sera: Not so tough that a team is allowed an advantage of course.
Assis.: No, not that tough, that would be unfair.
Sera: Unfair as in playing a team of 15 av9 dorfs all with guard and supported by some crazy stake wielding whore whilst still giving away two handicaps?
Assis.: No, that’s considered fair.
Sera: What a strange game we play.
Assis.: Wait until we go to LRB6, it gets much weirder then...
Sera: *shudder*
Assis.: Still could be worse, they could be dirty cheating bastid dorfs.
Sera: True.
Assis.: ...
Sera: ...
Assis.: Uh-oh!
Sera: What?
Assis.: They just fired an assistant coach!
Sera: And?
Assis.: Now we’re 51 points better!
Sera: Still. Hardly seems a justifiable reason to fire someone in this current economic climate.
Assis.: You don’t get it, now they get 3 handicaps!
Sera: What the... ... What can we do to stop this madness?
Assis.: Drop 10000 gold! That’ll make our team weaker!
Sera: That makes no sense! If anything it should makes us stronger! Poor Mikel won’t be nearly as tired for having to lug all that gold about!
Assis.: Shall I drop the cash?
Sera: *sigh* Fine.
Assis.: Done.
Sera: Good.
Assis.: Phew.
Sera: Stupid.
Assis.: Uh-oh!
Sera: Now what?
Assis.: They’ve just thrown their cash away too!
Sera: Oh, for **** sake!
Assis.: We could fire a zombie?
Sera: Where will the madness end? With us playing in the BB Sevens League?! Let’s just play them already!
[GG Duke - enjoyable all but to the very end. ;P]”
The assistant enters holding the magical up-to-the-minute-updates team sheets for Real and Fulham, shaking his head as he peruses them.
Assis.: This is bad.
Sera: What is?
Assis.: We’re 50 points better than Fulham.
Sera: That sounds good to me.
Assis.: No. It means we’re giving away two handicaps.
Sera: Two what now?
Assis.: Two handicaps, to even the game?
Sera.: I don’t understand?
Assis.: To even the game out we have to give away handicaps.
Sera: O...K... you mean like in Golf?
Assis.: Sort of...
Sera: So do we have to start 1 TD down then?
Assis.: Not quite. These handicaps are more like getting our players wrongly arrested, bribing the referee or knee capping a few of our guys.
Sera: That seems extreme.
Assis.: It’s a tough sport.
Sera: Not so tough that a team is allowed an advantage of course.
Assis.: No, not that tough, that would be unfair.
Sera: Unfair as in playing a team of 15 av9 dorfs all with guard and supported by some crazy stake wielding whore whilst still giving away two handicaps?
Assis.: No, that’s considered fair.
Sera: What a strange game we play.
Assis.: Wait until we go to LRB6, it gets much weirder then...
Sera: *shudder*
Assis.: Still could be worse, they could be dirty cheating bastid dorfs.
Sera: True.
Assis.: ...
Sera: ...
Assis.: Uh-oh!
Sera: What?
Assis.: They just fired an assistant coach!
Sera: And?
Assis.: Now we’re 51 points better!
Sera: Still. Hardly seems a justifiable reason to fire someone in this current economic climate.
Assis.: You don’t get it, now they get 3 handicaps!
Sera: What the... ... What can we do to stop this madness?
Assis.: Drop 10000 gold! That’ll make our team weaker!
Sera: That makes no sense! If anything it should makes us stronger! Poor Mikel won’t be nearly as tired for having to lug all that gold about!
Assis.: Shall I drop the cash?
Sera: *sigh* Fine.
Assis.: Done.
Sera: Good.
Assis.: Phew.
Sera: Stupid.
Assis.: Uh-oh!
Sera: Now what?
Assis.: They’ve just thrown their cash away too!
Sera: Oh, for **** sake!
Assis.: We could fire a zombie?
Sera: Where will the madness end? With us playing in the BB Sevens League?! Let’s just play them already!
[GG Duke - enjoyable all but to the very end. ;P]”
The Dwarves hired Zara, who had managed to sneak into the Real dressing room giving them some food which didn't go down to well. Two went home sick (Virus), one spent half the game in the toilet (Morleys) and the count was slightly put out by the strange broth (Where am I).
Despite good early indications the game started badly for the Dwarves. One of their number was sent off for the smallest of fouls, whilst several other Fulham players were carried from the field having taken slight knocks. The remaining players did what they could, but all too soon Real had stolen the ball and went on to score for 0-1.
After the break Real returned to the pitch looking to seal victory, and were soon controlling the game. However, in just a couple of short turns the Fulham players roused, quickly removing several Real players from the pitch, including their Star Mummy and the Count. Real tried a breakaway from midfield, but when the pass went astray Fulham pounced and came away with the ball. Real made one last ditch attempt to stop the score, but Saha was away and snatched a draw in stoppage time.
Thanks for the game Sera, best of luck with the rest of the season.”