“Zlurp Nation semi-finals

The head coach scouted out the 40 Miners before the game, watching their quarter-final performance closely. This dwarven franchise played well, co-operating on the pitch and pounding their pointy-eared adversaries.

In preparation for the game, Rark brought his sister to cheer the boyz on with some stolen Bugman's XXX and, for the first half, it worked well. Brort Eralg retrieved the ball and outflanked the dwarves on their stumpy legs. Meanwhile, Splurgle and Hagdish Guung each injured a Dwarf; coming up to the half-way point, the Orcs seemed to be in a strong position. Despite a brief wobble, caused by a tussle over the ball between Brort and Bar Goblin-Drinker, the Outlaws filled out the half, taking a 1 - 0 lead.

Eager to continue, the Orcs surged forwards in the second, blitzing forward after the kick. It went deep, and while they were able to pile on the pressure, the Miners seemed to have understood their armour; Leg Bertz, "da Hammer" and Hagdish Guung all left the pitch in quick succession. However, their sacrifices were not in vain, as the Dwarves were unable to run out the clock.

Battered and bruised, the Outlaws set up to receive a final time, with their championship hopes on the line. They were nine against eleven, but again, the dwarvish speed took it's toll, as the Orcs were able to push the stunties south, allowing Krirt to break free and score the winner.

The Outlaws claimed their victory from a tenacious and cunning foe, along with a place in the Zlurp Nation final. However, their victory comes at a cost, as Hagdish Guung, hero of the quarter-finals, will never play again after having his leg shattered.”