“145 Rookie League XXVI Play-offs: Speckled Eggs (Slann) v Cthulhu Fhtagn!! (Nurgle)

1st Half:

The atmosphere was thick with anticipation for this match between these two teams who had only managed a 1-1 draw during the league regular. Both were keen to prove they were top dog and given the play-off format they knew if things couldn't be resolved in 16 turns of the wheel then overtime would settle thing once and for all!

After Coach Skygry won the toss he opted to receive and get the first hits in on a talented Slann LOS, little did Coach Atari know that Skygry's Nurgle players had been coached in the secret weakness of the Slann team's armour and set out to exploit it.

After the crowd decided to take out (stunned) our tentacled hero Azathoth (much to coach Atari's relief) with a well placed rock , Skygry's Nurgle Warriors set out to make use of their new found knowledge with both Shudde M'ell and Yog-Sothoth badly hurting our Slann LOS specialists Pike and Scrambled, then the chainsaw damage dealer Max Spleenripper knocked out our poor Pelican! What was this witchcraft one may ask? The Speckled Eggs were feeling nervous at this unexpected change of fortune...they were the ones used to doing the bashing, some strong wills were needed to raise the team!

Coach Atari did what he could from the sidelines and pushed his team to move forward past the LOS and push the ball. Some big plays were needed to compensate for 3 men down on turn 1, the regular league winners couldn't fall so easily to these bully tactics!

Coach Skgry, seeing an empty LOS and a clear run to the red zone of the Speckled Eggs decided to use Fawndough's Headband on his prestigor Yig, this was going to be a passing Nurgle play to secure the ball and take the time to bring the pain to the Slann. Nurgle's Azathoth recovered from his blow by the crowd and covered the passing lane before Yig easily collected the ball and prepared to pass to his team-mate Hastur (an Emerging Star on this solid Nurgle side). Wait! What is this!? The Slann kicker Indigo makes a brilliant interception while in the grasp of the tentacled wonder Azathoth, the crowd goes wild. The Speckled Eggs needed someone to rise to the occasion and the rest of the team was filled with determination, some solid Frenzy blocks by Chutney cleared the lanes and a solid Pow by the Super Star Slann blitzer Duck took Azathoth's dirty tentacles of the big playmaker Indigo who preceded to run into Cthulhu Fhtagni!!'s red zone.

With no time to delay the touchdown wasn't long in the coming but not before Max Spleenripper earned his money with a brutal foul on our Slann's kroxigor Ostrich, seriously injuring him and making sure he wouldn't be playing in the final! Luckily the ref had his eyes on this dirty play and banned the chainsaw killer for the rest of the match.

Atari knew that solid defense was needed to prevent a tie going into half time as number superiority would surely lead to eventual Nurgle victory. As the half wore on the Nurgle's advantage became even stronger with 2 more solid casualties by Ithaqua on the playmaker Slann kicker Indigo and Abhoths Child taking out the guard catcher Chicken, with an apothecary having to be used on the blitzer Goose, who, shaking with fear, failed an easy leap to help out the red zone defense. Luckily the Slann alchemist was well prepared and patched him up to return for the 2nd half.

The drive continued to push and it looked like the Nurgle were sure to score with the ball firmly in the hands of the Nurgle prestigor Hastor. Wait! Whats this!? The up and coming Slann blitzer Dragoon with an assist from the Catcher Porpoise, came out of nowhere and sent Hastor to the bench with a smashed collar bone (-ST) and stripped the ball stopping the drive in its tracks and preventing the inevitable TD.

Halftime:

With 5 frogs down for the remainder of the game Coach Atari was spotted by Coach Skygry crying in the corridor outside the locker rooms lamenting his bad fortune at losing so many players to the Nurgle onslaught. Coach Skygry told Coach Atari to stop being such a cry baby as his team had everything to play for and needed but to hold onto the ball for a short half, how could he even consider being down on his luck with such an immaculate interception in the first half and a surprise lead...Atari realised he was playing against a true gentleman in his opposite number (even if he does choose to coach the degenerate Nurgle) and promised to try his best and stop being such a baby, he proceeded to go back to the locker room and rally his team. No doubt Coach Skygry told his team to keep getting those frogs where it hurts, as he should, like the quality coach he is.

2nd Half:

A perfect kick by the Nurgle went high and deep, though there was a chance of a touchback, coach Atari didn't want to leave things to chance anymore then he had to, so he sent his Emerging Star Catcher Porpoise to get underneath the kick and field it.

After some careful play on approach, a major battle broke out between the players against the southern sideline and coach Skygry directed his team into a slow surround of coach Atari's inferior player numbers. Led by the tentacled monster Azathoth (who was distinctly not stupid throughout the match, perhaps helped by being knocked in the head by a rock from the crowd 1st half) and held by the blitzer's Duck, Goose and Dragoon who did what they could to stop the Nurgle flood but were grossly outmatched.

A chance came early to form a solid cage with an advantage block by Super Star Duck. He attempted to push Azathoth off the cage and potential down and out (1D block, with re-roll and block skill advantage) but failed miserably as Azathoth knocked him to the side effortlessly and proceeded to get his malign tentacles on the ball carrier Porpoise. Desperate times called for desperate measures from our Slann team and a chance emerged about half way through when the catcher Turtle abandon the cage and made a break for the end zone and Porpoise attempted an epic pass to see him clear (or at least with the ball deep down field) and it was....a massive failure as the ball was fumbled. The Nurgle warrior Ithaqua proceeded to push the blitzer Goose into the crowd (who were kindly gentle to our Guard specialist) and Azathoth knocked Porpoise onto the ground with barely a flick of his tentacled limbs.

Things were not looking good for the Slann and coach Skygry set about putting into action plan 'take out remaining frog players' but as luck would have it Hounds of Tindalos Jr. failed to match Ducks mighty blitzer strength and knocked himself out trying to take him down. Little beknown to Coach Atari, catcher Porpoise had been making arrangements in the locker room for this eventuality, Jump(ing) Up from the ground he made a play for the ball and attempted a leap away from Azathoth's tentacled embrace, and succeeded!!!, he then dodged away from remaining defenders and used his superior speed to make a break down field, coach Atari was crying tears of joy on the sideline by this point. Little did anyone know till after the match, Porpoise had used the opportunity of being knocked down to grease his froggy limbs making it nigh on impossible for Azathoth to hold him, a truly sneaky tactic worthy of a super star.

Helped down-field by the blitzer Dragoon who leaped from the cage to offer his assistance to the lone back marker Skygry had left for this eventuality. Although further casualties were suffered on the following plays by the Nurgle on the Slann, the back marker, Mi Go, was unable to dodge out of Dragoons diving tackle allowing a further blitz by him to completely free our hero Porpoise and secure the victory!

Highly recommended to watch as a replay on FUMBBL TV, we see our league winners entering the final against a so far undecided opponent. If that match has half the drama this one did then it is bound to be epic, Thanks to Coach Skygry and his great attitude throughout the match and gracious behaviour in defeat. Look forward to seeing all you readers live for the Final.

Slightly Biased Reporter,

Coach Atari”