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Match Result · Blackbox division
Match recorded on 2020-05-29 23:20:54
70k
1/0/1
Player Performances
td
comp
cas
int
mvp
spp
turns
pass
rush
block
foul
TOTALS
2
-
2
-
1
15
145
-
34
56
1
#4 Harry Zona – Fractured Skull (-AV)
#10 Lor – Fractured Arm (MNG)
Player Performances
td
comp
cas
int
mvp
spp
turns
pass
rush
block
foul
TOTALS
-
-
1
-
1
7
161
-
17
40
-
#10 Eddy "El pamplinas" – Dead (RIP)
“ Brutal reporter. I loved it!
”
”
“Howdy, Bim, it’s great to be there, isn’t it?”
“It is, Job. Bulls have just entered Bar Brawl and they’re going to face a solid dwarf team for quarter finals.”
“Yeah. It’s not good news for Bulls. They have positive sheets, or at least balanced ones, against all races excepted dwarves. It should be a hard game.”
“True, but it’s been a while since they faced these little bearded guys, Job. When they did, they had nothing to counter mass guard neither weapons to break dwarves’ armours. They now have two players with Claw and Mighty Blow skills. That could help.”
“Whoo-ee Bim, may you be right! And what about these dwarves? Did they already face a Nurgle team?”
“Yes, they played four Nurgle teams for a sheet of three wins, one draw and no lose. That really won’t be easy for Bulls.”
“Eeek! That’s what I fear. Anyway, 15 000 Bulls’ fans and 16 000 dwarves’ spectators came to see this game and that’s a perfect weather for a blood bowl game.”
“Well, there are a few clouds on the horizon, let’s see if weather remains nice until the end of that game”
“It should rain more blood than water on that pitch, Bim, that’s why we’re all there!”
“True. Now, let’s introduce both rosters. They are both made up of 14 players. Dwarves used their inducement to hire Boomer Eziasson, a cheap star player known for his Bombardier skill”
“Is that legal, Bim?”
“Ref could consider it isn’t. Dwarves also hired a wizard. There should be many craters in the grass at the end of this game.”
“Bulls win the toss and chose to be in offence first. Aren’t they better in defence? Is that a good choice, Bim?”
“Hem, don’t know, Job. But it should be a tough game. And I suppose Bulls wanted to be the first to hit. Dwarves only place three players on line of scrimmage and all others are positioned far behind. Boomer Eziasson is the most withdrawn of them. It looks like a 3-3-4-1”
“Rotspawn and the four bloaters settle on the line of scrimmage in turn, while two rotters cover wide zones. The four pestigors are behind. It’s a 5-2-2-2 formation. Ball is kicked at the center of Bulls’ camp. Oh my god! That’s a Blitz on kick-off! Dwarves start their drive a fraction of time before Bulls can react. A troll slayer knocks down Harry Zona, star bloater of Bulls, and 5 dwarves take place on the mediane line. Then Boomer Eziasson tries to throw a bomb”
“And that’s a fumble! Boomer is knocked down, Jakob Creutzfeldt catch the landing ball in the center of his team pitch half and Bulls can reply”
“What a spectacular start, Bim! Bulls throw four blocks on the line but only knock down one dwarf without breaking his armour. Jakob Creutzfeldt goes up the ball on the right wing with a pestigors and rotter escort.”
“Dwarves just can block two Bulls’ players. Only one is knocked down and his armour isn’t broken. First blocks are peaceful!”
“Bulls keep on sinking on the right wing with soft blocks. They don’t manage to break dwarf armours so Rico Vid, the Dirty Player rotter, tries a first foul. That’s only a stunned and ref spots him! He’s fired!”
“How can he do that, Job? That’s unfair! Boomer Eziasson can throw his bombs with impunity and Rico is fired for a gentle foul!”
“Bulls’ offence is curbed. They are at 10 against 11 dwarves and two pestigors are stunned, one on a block and another on a bomb. They’ll quick have to find a solution.”
“Bim bam boom! That’s the solution! Al Ergie kills a dwarf with a fantastic head block!”
“We all know why you’re called Bim, Bim!”
“As true as nobody knows why you’re called Job, Job! You’re the official commentator of Bulls’s tourney games but that’s the first time they play one!”
“That may be sexual, Bim!”
“Then I don't want to know! This killing block motivated Bulls who cross the field in width to set up their cage slightly to the left”
“Dwarves are a bit too slow to follow this maneuver. Five of them stay behind on opposite wing and Nurgle players' foul appearance keep them from coming off.”
“It’s sooo funny to hear them complain about bloaters smell! Beeeeuuuuaaarggg!”
“Boomer Eziasson throws a third bomb but it’s intercepted by Uncle Blob! He’s a big ugly elf!”
“Jeremy Cosis knocks out a dwarf slayer and Bulls offence now comes forward left wing.”
“Dwarves reply with Chris Diarhea being knocked out too but Bulls run straight towards dwarves’ endzone, sticking Boomer Eziasson to prevent him throwing his bombs.”
“Dwarves will need magic so they don’t take that touchdown!”
“You didn’t say so well, Bim! Jakob Creutzfeldt is turned into a ridiculous frog by dwarf wizard and he drops ball to the floor…”
“That’s cheating! Ref let dwarves do illegal things and he fires our players for blocks at ground level!”
“Dwarves fold back and cross the area of the ball with four against three Bulls and a frog.”
“The frog remains alone in contact with the ball and Bulls create a melee not far from the ball in which they have the advantage of the number.”
“Dwarves knock out another rotter in this melee but a blitzer dodge try to put a tackle zone on the ball fails”
“Bulls do not miss the opportunity. Luke Aemia picks up the ball and scores. Touchdoooowwnnn!”
“1-0 for Bulls at turn 7. Dwarves now have two turns to egalize before half time.”
“Only one of Bulls' kos come back. Chris Diarhea is still missing and Rico Vid is banned for the whole game. Bulls place on the pitch in defence in depth. It’s a 3-3-2-3. Three rotters are on the line of scrimmage. Rotspawn and bloaters are in second and third line. The three remaining pestigors will act as safeties.”
“Dwarves chose a more original placement with a 10-1 formation. They are ten on the line of scrimmage and Patenas, their agile runner, is alone near their own endzone. This is a long kick from Bulls and rain begins to fall!”
“I told you there were some clouds and it won’t be nice weather during the whole game.”
“Well, Bim, I have to admit you may be better at forecasting weather than at predicting Blood Bowl match results!”
“Dwarves block in the center and escape on both wings. A rotter is knocked out. Patenas easily picks up the ball despite rain.”
“Bulls push a blitzer who’s no more able to score and only put tackle zones on the two other dwarves in position to do it.”
“Dwarves knock out another rotter and try an elfic action with their blitzer on the right wing. But his both down blitz cancels any chance of touchdown.”
“That was really difficult to score there anyway, Bim.”
“Yes it was. But we all know everything is possible in this amazing game!”
“Dwarves finish their half with dodges in tackle zones to throw a risky one dice block against Harry Zona, a Mighty Blow Claw bloater. That’s a pooowww! And Harry he’s injured.”
“Nooooo! His skull is fractured and he doesn’t regenerate! What a terrible last half action!”
“Bulls still lead 1-0 at half time, Bim. And Harry should be back for finals if Bulls do well.”
“How could they reach final with their little rotten girls’ blocks?!? Only one of their kos come back and they’ll start second half at 10 against 11. I fear they will be crushed in second half. Dwarves will go for 1-1 to reach overtime with a lot more players than Bulls!”
“Nothing is done yet, Bim. Bulls place their defence in 3-3-4, still with three rotters on the line of scrimmage and dwarves chose a 5-5-1 as they have a lot more time to score that time. Rotters survive and dwarves pick-up the ball.”
“Bulls remain in their camp and try to cover the entire width of the pitch. Al Ergie throw a blitz on a dwarf blocker… and that’s a K-OOOO ! Better! That’s a 10 vs 10 now!"
“Dwarves begin a breakthrough on the left flank without however crossing the midline.”
“Bulls only block their access to the center. It’s like they agree to be overwhelmed on the wing.”
“A rotter is knocked out again and dwarves wait before drilling.”
“Bulls try to reply but they obtain stunned dwarf at best and rotspawn stands around trying to remember what it is he’s meant to be doing. It’s like Bulls are only 8 to defend now!”
“And a rotter is seriously injured! Dwarves take the opportunity now. They surround the remaining Bulls and their ball holder crosses the midline and sinks into the opposite half.”
“The three bloaters block to create an opening and Jonas Thma, pestigor star, dodges and blitzes! This is a POOOWWW! That’s what I call a good sack! Jonas even picks-up the ball under the rain! That pestigor is so unbelievable!”
“He’s a real mutant. His Two Heads help him to do incredible actions. Lots of players in the team have classic Nurgle mutations as Tentacles, Foul Appearance and Disturbing Presence but he’s the only one in the team to have additional members."
“Well, from what I know, he’s not exactly the only one. That’s maybe a secret but I’ve been told that Jeremy Cosis would have three balls.”
“Three balls? Oh my god, is he a Nurgle or Slaanesh adept? That said, his sexual practices are not our business.”
“You’re right. It’s not our role to say that all team’s cheerleaders call him “third half”. Let’s talk about this game.”
“Dwarves try to recover the ball but their slowness is a real handicap to do it. Only both runners can easily reach Jonas Thma who is stronger than them. It’s only a one dice sack try. And that’s a push!”
“Jonas dodges again and goes for it to reach a semi-cage with a rotter and rotspawn, who’s back in the game. Jakob Creutzfeldt blitzes to complete that little cage. That’s not perfect but that should be enough to protect ball for instance.”
“Dwarves block and blitz without breaking armours and one of their blitzer sticks Jonas.”
“That’s not enough to stop Bulls’ mutant! He blitzes and knocks down dwarf blitzer to run on the left wide zone. Jakob Creutzfeldt and even Han Thrax both dodge to be able to protect their team-mate. That smells soooo good!!”
“Well, Bim, don’t forget we’re speaking about a Nurgle team… "
“Dwarves try to fall back but trip up trying to go-for-it. Here we are!”
“Bulls finish work pushing a dwarf blocker in the crowd, as a gift for their fans, and injuring a dwarf runner. That’s a 2-0 win and a qualification for semi-finals!”
“It should be hard however as Harry Zona will miss that next game.”
“Bulls did well without him in second half. Who will be their opponent?”
“It will be a dark elf team or a necromantic team, we don’t know yet.”
“I’m already in a hurry to be at the microphone with you, Bim”
“See you soon, Job, see you soon, fans!”
”