| Player | Position | Games | SPPs | Skills | Injuries |
12 | Shadow's Diet | Goblin | 4 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | m, n |
4 | Ro's Ex Wife | Goblin | 3 | 10 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, Side Step | d |
5 | NWL | Goblin | 1 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | m, n |
7 | Keanu Reeves | Goblin | 9 | 6 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, Side Step | d |
6 | You | Goblin | 4 | 2 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | m, n |
14 | Barney the Dinosaur | Goblin | 6 | 3 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | m, n |
5 | George Dubya Bush | Goblin | 7 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | m, -ag |
14 | John Cena | Goblin | 7 | 10 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, Side Step | d |
12 | Scientology | Goblin | 12 | 7 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, Dirty Player | m, n |
7 | Uwe Boll | Goblin | 14 | 8 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, Side Step | d |
6 | Battlefield Earth | Goblin | 10 | 10 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, Side Step | d |
5 | HasuDrone | Goblin | 7 | 8 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, +MA | d |
4 | New Coke | Goblin | 19 | 8 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, Side Step | d |
10 | Virtual Boy | Goblin | 16 | 22 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, Side Step, Diving Tackle | d |