Poll |
Who is teh sexiest OBBA star? |
The Duke |
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49% |
[ 26 ] |
The Duke |
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50% |
[ 27 ] |
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Total Votes : 53 |
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Shades_SteelFist
Joined: Sep 11, 2008
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 01:03 |
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pythrr
Joined: Mar 07, 2006
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 01:09 |
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Ashley is a girl dorf's name. |
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Meanandugl
Joined: Feb 05, 2013
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 12:34 |
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What an interesting Prem preview, I thought - until it came to the predictions:
Wotfudboy wrote: | Season 23 - OBBA Premiership
.....
Bottom three contenders (in alphabetical order) - Barmbek Bloodletic, Ragenham 'N Dedbridge and Tranmare Rovers. Just don't think they will have the all round ability to consistently overcome their opponents to beat the drop despite the talent of the coaches.
... |
Sooooo, this (otherwise quite talented) writer has the guts to tell the world that we, Barmbek Bloodletic, season 22 OBBA Cup winners, are not good enough to make the cut this time. Talks about being too fragile and so forth . Pah! AGILE we are .
This calls for an answer. We throw the gauntlet on you, Wotfud! We'll fight to the last pointy ear to rank above your clumsy cdorfs at the end of the season. Start buying pills against dizzyness, cos that's how you guys will feel after our match.
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Thanks for the write-up, and the opportunity to start a nice little vendetta! |
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The_Great_Gobbo
Joined: Aug 04, 2014
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 14:15 |
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As soon az Awamamamamamaba getz iz arse inter gear we iz gunna play kum an wotch |
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Wotfudboy
Joined: Feb 17, 2004
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 14:30 |
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Meanandugl wrote: | Start buying pills against dizzyness, cos that's how you guys will feel after our match. |
I assume it's because we'll be suffering vertigo for being soooo much higher than you in the table? |
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Throweck
Joined: Feb 23, 2013
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 14:59 |
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Wotfudboy wrote: | Meanandugl wrote: | Start buying pills against dizzyness, cos that's how you guys will feel after our match. |
I assume it's because we'll be suffering vertigo for being soooo much higher than you in the table? |
BOOOOM! The smack has been layethed down. |
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Meanandugl
Joined: Feb 05, 2013
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 15:18 |
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Wotfudboy wrote: | Meanandugl wrote: | Start buying pills against dizzyness, cos that's how you guys will feel after our match. |
I assume it's because we'll be suffering vertigo for being soooo much higher than you in the table? |
Better enjoy the table now - it won't look that nice any more after your games have been played |
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Wotfudboy
Joined: Feb 17, 2004
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 15:52 |
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Royston
Joined: Dec 05, 2008
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 16:29 |
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pythrr wrote: | Royston, I am thrilled you have highlighted our new secret weapon, the gobbo. |
It's part of our new strategy - Codename: Kill the Gobbo & Make a Manikin Out of 'Im. |
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Royston
Joined: Dec 05, 2008
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 16:37 |
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pythrr wrote: | Ashley is a girl dorf's name. |
I thought all Dwarfs were girls. |
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Royston
Joined: Dec 05, 2008
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  Posted:
Sep 03, 2015 - 17:56 |
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(OMG! I cannot believe Ugne got kicked out of Bake Off! Anyway back to the job in hand and another 0.5 points)
Next up we have the inarticulate Madchester City XI more bloody Dwarfs!
Player to watch: Veteran player and strongest Madchester player James Milner. With 6 casualties from just 16 games he is definitely top of everyone's hit list.
Overview: From the player sheet I've been handed it says this team has 13 players, yet they have XI in their name. Blatant. Rule. Violation. George strip them of all points and relegate them to the Conference please?! Bunch of big bearded cheating girls (grumble, grumble).
Sixthly (yes it is a word, look it up), we have the squishy incomprehensible Dark Elfs, Peterboroug Un-united - seriously who comes up with these names! Un-untied! You mean Loose! Change your bloody names boys:
Player to watch: Journeyman rookie lineelf Xavier Dirtyshield - he signs his name with an X so you know he's dangerous. He could easily be the player of the season if the Loose decide to offer him a permanent contract after his debut this September. Rumours are he is the bastard love child of OBBA legend Rogerthe Goat-Elf (of Bath City Bladuds fame).
Overview: The Loose are a team of heavy hitters with Barry Fry, Robert Olijnik and David Farrell on the side and also very agile despite reported dodgy knees sustained by Fry and emerging star blitzer Grant McCann in pre-season training. This team will be challenging for promotion by the end of the season.
The 2nd Orc team in The Championship are up next, the indolent Stanforc Brigade:
Player to watch: This easily has to be emerging star lineorc Oscar. This lino is Stanforc's top scorer ever. Rumours of a sex tape with Ashley from the Redbeards is entirely true.
Overview: A strong team without any in-depth assistance from the bench. Also an also ran this season.
Next up with have the easily intimidated ☩ Arsenal ☩:
Player to watch: This can only be superstar wardancer Danny Welbeck. Top scorer and Cas Leader for the Division Signs since his rookie year. If Danny plays well, the whole team plays well. Little known fact: Bath City Bladuds plan to kill him.
Overview: Wood Elf teams are dangerous, but super squishy, this could go a number of ways in such a heavy hitting league. I would love to see these guys in the Premiership next season.
Last but not least we have the masterful, powerful, Nurgle-rific, incandescent Bath City Bladuds - the 4th oldest team in OBBA and the bloatiest team in The Championship:
Player to watch: All of them, strength in depth, every single one of their 15 players poised to grind you into the asphalt and score a touchdown straight from the line.
Overview: Fear them. That is all. No more no less, not a single word more needs to be written. All these other words I'm including are superfluous. Including the word "superfluous" (Mrs. Chorley would be proud of me for using that in a sentence).
So for an extra 2 points (George that makes 3 all together please!), here is the final league table:
1st: Bath City Bladuds - 30 points, 'nuff said.
2nd: Brizzle Reavers - 25 points, 'cos they cheat.
3rd: Division Signs - 13 points, lots of TDs from the Wardancers and maybe the Tree too.
4th: Fulham Fallen - 13 points, just missing out on promotion due to goal difference.
5th: The Loose - 11 points, almost looked like going up but fell at the hurdles.
6th: Bury'd - 9 points, should have been higher in the league but I forgot about them and couldn't be bothered to change anything.
7th: Stan's Fork & Knife, Greasy Spoon Extraordinaire - 6 points, just missing out on relegation after relying on a lineorc to win games for them.
8th: Le Frencho Dwarfs - 5 points, all dwarfs suck, these suck a little less as they've got Hobos helping out.
9th: Madchester's 11 - 1 point, the coach's strategy this year is to do round write ups thinking it'll gain him 9 points, sadly mistaken.
10th: Daggered Redboards - -25 points, for being ugly, for being dwarfs and for generally sucking. Buy a bloody Deathroller!!! |
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spock
Joined: Feb 15, 2006
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  Posted:
Sep 04, 2015 - 07:00 |
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pythrr
Joined: Mar 07, 2006
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  Posted:
Sep 04, 2015 - 07:10 |
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And a mighty upset at that!
Take that, foul monkeys! |
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Medon
Joined: Jan 28, 2015
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  Posted:
Sep 04, 2015 - 07:29 |
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Village_Idiot
Joined: Mar 09, 2009
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  Posted:
Sep 04, 2015 - 18:26 |
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Hey, can I have my Orcs back? The monkeys are still under warranty, right? |
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