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Backwater Bilge : SURTUR WEEKLY

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Poll

How do YOU like this sort of Tournament Reporting

GREAT!!!

68%

[ 11 ]

It's okay. Nothing new or special though...

25%

[ 4 ]

I don't really like it that much

[ 0 ]

CRAP!!! off with the head !!!

[ 1 ]

Total Votes : 16

Surtur

Joined: Jan 09, 2004

Posted: Feb 26, 2004 - 18:55

This is the Official thread of the SURTUR WEEKLY. Matters on the tournament are still posted to the main thread, which can found here

The first issue is due to be released on sunday 29th.

Welcome back then.

_________________
-cK

Last edited by Surtur on %b %29, %2004 - %14:%Feb; edited 2 times in total

Matt_wyeth

Joined: Nov 29, 2003

Posted: Feb 26, 2004 - 20:13

game report for the bilge boozers http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=match&id=254378
official report from coach William Ecker:
I am really please with the overall effort of are team. I especially glad that my reciving core performed as well as they had been in practice. Although my linemen need to provide Bobby with better protection. We had some problem on defense the second half but thankfully our offense stepped up and put the winning points on the board. This week we'll look at our successes and try to repeat them in our next match.

Surtur

Joined: Jan 09, 2004

Posted: Feb 29, 2004 - 14:16

SURTUR WEEKLY, WEEK 1:

BREAKING NEWS :

Nuffle Warriors, the official norse representative team was banned this week from the tournament because too violent behaviour, after the game against Lizarmen team Tletli Tlinoxoz. The team started fouling the lizardmen too openly at the end of the second half and the ref penalized the players on spot. It was decided that the team was to be removed from the tournament, and that another norse team would take it's place. The second best team that the northmen could assemble were the Midgard Vikings Pro, a promising young team of norse players. Rumours of the Vikings playing a practice match against some 2nd party team has been floating in the air all week...

We caught up with the team manager McCloud just as he was walking out of the town gates and asked him a few questions:

Q: Why did your team get disqualified from the tournament ?
"We weren't disqualified, we were given a better offer by another league. So we packed our bags and left."

Q: What are your feelings on norse elders replacing you with Midgard Vikings Pro ?
"They will die like the dogs they are!"

Q: Any words for the Tournament officials or the new team ?
"Umm, Lets see...as a friend(BunnyPuncher) once said "Fouling Rocks!"

Thank you Mr.McCloud ...
"You are welcome... open the gates already !!! Haven't got all millenia to spare... 

The coach seemed a bit upset, but you just never know about these characters, especially NORSE characters, who have a wide spread reputation of being somewwhat agressive in their sayings.
_________________________

FACTS ABOUT LEAGUES WEEKLY AWARDS, OUT NOW! :

The media at Backwater Bilge has met at the beginning of this week and decided to start a weekly award system, that awards players from all areas of play. The awards include Muddy Water Weekly for the most violent player, Black Eye Weekly for the best player, Leopal Weekly for the best stunty player and Bilge Team of the Week. The awards are to nominated at the end of every week here on SURTUR WEEKLY.

"This weeks winners are !!!" :

BILGE TEAM OF THE WEEK :

Bilge Boozers
 The Boozers really did it this time. They were counted as underdogs before the beginning of the game against Cloackwood Ravens, but turned the tide early on to the game. Great match...

Muddy Water Weekly Award ( Most Violent Player ) :

- Quatzitoxorix (Saurus) TEAM :Tletli Tlinoxoz
This saurus almost single handedly put an end to the fouling and bashing of the Nuffle Warriors eventually killing Antonious Stonecrusher a Norse Lineman, who was on his way to foul one of his teammates. Quatzitoxorix was awarded a big bowl of insects and maggots for his good play, and the award to his manager EvolveToAnarchism. Good job...

Special Mentionings :

- Gorkgrok "Brings More Beer" (Orc Lineman) TEAM : Beer!!!
A very nice block on Artefact Containment Engineer (TEAM : Abyss Acquisitions Corp) that made him miss the next weeks practice and game. Keep up the good work and maybe next week you'll receive the actual award.

 - Claudia Schiffer (Amazon Linewoman) TEAM : Gentle Giants Huris
Injuring 3 players is a game is usually considered as a great accomplishment, but with the halflings counting as half a player each, it isn't that grand. Still a very raw and good effort from Claudia. 

The Black Eye Weekly Award ( Best Player of The Week ) :

- The Gatekeeper (Dark Elf Lineman) TEAM : Hades Little Helpers
Can anybody disagree (except the boyz of The Golden Halibut Clan) that the flashing 2 TD's and a MVP to top it all can't make The Gatekeeper player of the week. This astounding performance in week 1 will leave players and fans alike holding their breath for week 2.

Leopal Award ( Best Stunty Player of The Week )

- Leggit (Goblin) TEAM : Artyfact, Whuts Dat
Although not a flashy as The Gatekeeper, this little fellow pulled out 2 TD's to bring victory to his ogre mastered team. As a special reward Leggit shall receive a fungipie, made by the Dwarf Maiden Mama Stonehammer of the Muddy Water Inn Gourmet.
_________________________

OBITUARIES :
The Dead Players of the Week :

- Shaithis (Elf Lineman) Team : Cloackwood Ravens
- "Potbelly" Grimmuns (Halfling) Team : Backwater Banqueteers
- Lanneg "The Fork" Nodger (Halfling) Team : Backwater Banqueteers
- Johnny "Food Fight" Lugger (Halfling) Team : Backwater Banqueteers
- Antonious Stonecrusher (Norse Lineman) Team : Nuffle Warriors
- Nuled Indush (Chaos Dwarf Blocker) Team : Golden Halibut Clan

... rest in peace. Your work has been done here... 

Thank you for reading and best luck to all the teams for week 2 ...

_________________
-cK

Mezir

Joined: Aug 02, 2003

Posted: Mar 07, 2004 - 00:23

The Backwater Banqueteers feel they deserve a special award for having provided half the material for the obituary column this week. Smile

_________________
Build a man a fire and he's warm for a day; set a man on fire and he's warm for the rest of his life.

Surtur

Joined: Jan 09, 2004

Posted: Mar 10, 2004 - 14:29

SURTUR WEEKLY, WEEK 2:

CHAOS REPRESENTATIVE TEAM CHANGED! :
Coach BloodRunners is out !!! The Conclave of the four chaos powers Khorne, Tzeentzch, Nurgle and Slaanesh has decided to pull the ferosious khorne team, for needed missions elsewhere and replace them with a dubious team of semiperverts, the Slaves of Love. Coach Surtur is not willing to comment on the matter of them arriving to the Backwater Bilge anymore than with a phrase "my players will love it here..."

INTRODUCED PLAYER OF THE WEEK :

Ludwig Giantsbane , TEAM : Backwater Banqueteers

Age : 29

Height : 3'8"
Weight : 45 lbs

Hometown : Backwater now, previously a little town in the moot no one has ever heard of
Sponsors : Aunt Madge's Cupcakes

Q: Are you satisfied to your level of play here in Backwater Bilge ? 
A: With mine, definitely, but my team-mates could use some extra training - they almost screwed up our victory last time!

Q: Name your favorite teammate ? 
A: Andy Dewid, who puts a lot of effort into practice and the game itself, willing to sacrifice himself for the noble cause (food and victory).

Q: Do you think that stunties are always been pressed down by bigger adversaries than don't even know how to score a TD ? 
A: That depends. When there are no halflings left on the field our opponents have shown time and again that they *do* know how to score a TD.

Q: What is your oppinion allowing Big Guys playing with stunty teams, are you underestimated ? 
A: Big Guys give the opponent something serious to hit - it's more for them than for us that they're on the field. We proved this conclusively when we won the first half against the Golden halibut Clan 1 - 0, without any Big Guys, and drew the second with 1 all, with both treemen present.

Q: General oppinions about the tournament ? 
A: It's a great fun tourney, but somewhat violent. Five of us have been killed in two matches(!!!) - and I gather there have been about as many more deaths outside the Banqueteers as well. Also, people seem to be obsessed about some artifact or other.

Q: Favorite team, if not your own ? 
A: I haven't been able to see many of the other teams play yet, as thus I don't really have a favourite team.

Q: Last few words ? 
A: Eat more cup-cakes!

____________________________________________________

BILGE TEAM OF THE WEEK :

BACKWATER BANQUETEERS
If a halfling team can defeat a Chaos Dwarf team, that should be enough said.

Muddy Water Weekly Award ( Most Violent Player ) :

- Christy Turlington (Amazon Linewoman) TEAM : Gentle Giants Huris
Playing with violent and ruthless style Christy gained some nice moments in a game versus Seelenscherben. The highlight of the evening (at least for Christy) came at the second half, when she blocked Abgrund, a linerat of the opposing team and sent him flying for the medics. Abgrund survived this rude treatment, but rumours say that his seen limping outside the stadium.

The Black Eye Weekly Award ( Best Player of The Week ) :

- Ludwig Giantsbane (Halfling) TEAM : Backwater Banqueteers
Just amazing! This little halfling single handedly played the game of week 2 into the Banqueteers pouch. Scoring 2 TDs and gaining the MVP of the match!!! Marvelous sportmanship and courage. Hope this little guy survives past the practice sessions with those ogres around, to week 3.

Special mentionings :

-Grik (Orc Thrower) TEAM : BEER!!!
Led his team to a tight 3-2 victory over the crowd favorites Bilge Boozers and showed some talent on several fields of knowledge (2 completions, 1 touchdown and 1 casualty). without Ludwig Giantbanes total domination, definately worthy of the award.

Leopal Award ( Best Stunty Player of The Week ) :

- Leggit (Goblin) TEAM : Artyfact, Whuts Dat?
The leader of the whole Backwater Bilge Tournament in touchdowns with 4, doubled his pot by scoring 2 in game against Hades Little Helpers, the favorite team of the game. Second week in a row performance. Commendable (…for a goblin)

____________________________________________________

Top Scorers after week 2 :

Leggit (Goblin), Artyfact Whuts Dat? ( 4 )
Geril Elfrascal (Wood Elf Catcher), Who Let The Orcs Out ( 3 ) 

Top Blockers after week 2 :

Bib Du Wun (Ogre), Artyfact Whuts Dat? ( 3 )
Claudia Schiffer (Amazon Blitzer), Gentle Giants Huris ( 3 )

____________________________________________________

Obituaries :

- Porfirion Keeper of Filth (Wood Elf Lineman), Who Let The Orcs Out
- Freddy "Too Fast" Fredrick (Human Catcher), Bilge Boozers
- "Nasty" Neil Newmen (Human Lineman), Bilge Boozers
- Stench (Goblin), Death Jesters
- Terrin (Thrall), We Suck Too
- Material Sample Collector (Beastman), Abyss Acquisitions Corp
- Transportation Engineer (Beastman), Abyss Acquisitions Corp

____________________________________________________

That's all for now, from Surtur Weekly, hope you enjoyed yourself. Gongratulations to the winners and good luck to week 3...

_________________
-cK

Surtur

Joined: Jan 09, 2004

Posted: Mar 23, 2004 - 18:43

SURTUR WEEKLY, WEEK 3:

BILGE TEAM OF THE WEEK : 

GENTLE GIANTS HURIS
Total domination over their opponent Who Let The Orcs Out. All areas of play included.

Muddy Water Weekly Award ( Most Violent Player ) :

- SMAG På Den Her (Khemrian Mummy), TEAM : Hiding Under The City
Finally rising up to the challenge, this relic turned out to be a real pain in the bottom. Especially for the three Bilge Boozers players sent to the injury bin

The Black Eye Weekly Award ( Best Player of The Week ) :

- Claudia Schiffer (Amazon Blitzer) TEAM : Gentle Giants Huris
Unbelievable craftmanship from the star blitzer of this weeks team of the week. Scoring 2 touchdowns and sending an wood elf player to the injury bin was not enough for this remarkable woman, she still had the time to lead the defence, which kept the opposition from scoring even a single touchdown.

Special mentionings :

- Trogluk (Orc Blitzer)TEAM : BEER!!!
A promising first game for the young orc. The touchdown and a casualty, made his comrades welcome him in the team with almost open arms ( the orc anatomy is made such that they cannot reach their arms all the way forward )

Leopal Award ( Best Stunty Player of The Week ) :

THE AWARD HAS NOT HAD A SERIOUS CONTENDER THIS WEEK.
( It might be that the backwater Banqueteers might produce a serious contender late to the week )
____________________________________________________

Top Stars of Backwater Bilge :(Each Teams Best Player)

- The Gatekeeper (Dark Elf Lineman), TEAM : Hades Little Helpers 4 Touchdowns + 1 Most Valuable Player Award = 17 Star Player Points

- Claudia Schiffer (Amazon Blitzer), TEAM : Gentle Giants Huris 1 Completion + 1 Touchdown + 5 Casualties = 14 Star Player Points 

- Quatzitoxorix (Lizardman Saurus), TEAM : Tletli Tlinoxoz 4 Casualties + 1 Most Valuable Player = 13 Star Player Points 

- Lucian (Elf Thrower), TEAM : Cloackwood Ravens 10 Completions + 1 Touchdown = 13 Star Player Points 

- Leggit (Goblin), TEAM : Artyfact, Whuts Dat ? 4 Touchdowns = 12 Star Player Points

- Grik (Orc Thrower), TEAM : BEER!!! 2 Completions + 2 Touchdowns + 2 Casualties = 12 Star Player Points

- Ludwig Giantsbane(Halfling), TEAM : Backwater Banqueteers 2 Touchdowns, 1 Most Valuable Player = 11 Star Player Points 

- Ghol Agrat (Hobgoblin), TEAM : Golden Halibut Clan 2 Touchdowns + 1 Most Valuable Player = 11 Star Player Points

- Geril Elfrascal (Wood Elf Catcher), TEAM : Who Let The Orcs Out 1 Completion + 3 Touchdowns = 10 Star Player Points

- Raphael (Vampire), TEAM : We Suck Too 1 Touchdown + 1 Casualty + 1 Most Valuable Player = 10 Star Player Points

- Tatyana Fangcrush (Beastwoman), TEAM : Slaves of Love 2 Most Valuable Player Awards = 10 Star Player Points

- Cusi, The Claws of Funbbl (Werewolf), Memorabilia of Funbbl 1 Touchdown + 3 Casualties = 9 Star Player Points 

- Yngmar (Norse Lineman), TEAM : Midgard Vikings Pro 1 Touchdown + 1 Most Valuable Player Award = 8 Star Player Points

- Irrsinn (Skaven Thrower) TEAM : Seelenscherben 3 Completions + 1 Most Valuable Player = 8 Star Player Points

- Ethan Lyric (Dwarf Longbeard), TEAM : Give Peace A Chance 1 Completion + 3 Casualties = 7 Star Players Points

- Someone (Elf Lineman) TEAM : Central Elves 2 Touchdowns = 6 Star Player Points 

- Foreign Technology Expert (Beastman), TEAM : Abyss Acquisition Corp 1 Completion + 1 Touchdown + 1 Casualty = 6 Star Player Points

- William "Wideopen" Whitman (Human Catcher), TEAM : Bilge Boozers 2 Touchdowns = 6 Star Player Points

- Narhbub the Unbathed (Goblin), TEAM : Deadly Jesters 1 Most Valuable Player Award = 5 Star Player Points
____________________________________________________

Obituaries :

Kickit (Goblin), Artyfact, Whuts Dat ?
Ozractlor (Skink), Tletli Tlinoxoz
Zelohxoractlor (Skink), Tletli Tlinoxoz
Laurentiu (Elf Lineman), Cloackwood Ravens
Skeggi (Norse Lineman), Midgard Vikings Pro
Lidskjalf (Norse Lineman), Midgard Vikings Pro
Slappy (Goblin), Deadly Jesters

_________________
-cK

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