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Joined: Oct 10, 2018

Post   Posted: Apr 22, 2021 - 14:03 Reply with quote Back to top

Well hello Forks it is the Mascara snake here the session clarinet player for the Silky Wilkinsons band the Tentacles.

Bringing you the Tencale Smack.


For those of you familiar this is our lighting paced builder tournament where Osbbl's freshest teams (that seems anti undead-ed) come and battle it out for glory.

This years Smack is bigger than ever. 8 teams all frothing at the mouth and that isn't anything to do with the dodgy mead we have been handing out. Yet again the competition has been split into two pools with hastily made trophies that the locals have fashioned.

The Pearls before a Swine division

Blakk Plague
Daemons of Slannesh have a chequered history in the Osbbl and are not always welcome sights. Could these be the ones who can step out of Tom Thunderbanjo's shadow and do something other than strain a groin? Well if so it will be DA Vid who leads the charge.

Captain Pollution

In the Deserted Isles we love to figure out which way the wind blows before we make a call and we all knew there would come the day where the Air elementals would first air on cabal (I see what you did and I don't like it-ed). Captain Pollution himself will he be a blow hard or a whirlwind?


After sailing the seas of the damned and playing along with sea monsters and other pirates, the crew of the Khalilah has come to the deserted Isles to sea what they can sea (groan-ed). This squad rocked up on to the shore and seem to be endearing themselves with the locals.We have not seen such royalty as The Sultan of Qanas since the diplomats of Gun Boat diplomacy were here. I hope the Sultan's speeches are not as ponderous as the Sea elves.

Crouching Hot pot Hidden Butty

These demented fellas arrived sometime ago and have took to robbing bakeries up and down the isles While the Statues stand guard. A unique and fun playing style has endeared them with the fans. Ginger Dynamite is their first new recruit since entering the Smack how many little body bags will we need?

I may be Hungry but I sure Aint Weird division


13 Assasins

Well the Answer is at least 13 more these flings arrived masquerading as a circus act, a circus of death is the real identity. The Halfing infestation is a welcome sight to many teams like Sirens Song hoping they will fill Chum buckets rather than them and teams like Larry Vaughans Love Spawn hoping the same. Either way they will entertain. The Veiled Knife is the one to watch so we are told.

Beef Injunction

Minotaurs in there thousands exported live and brought to the deserted Isles what could go wrong? Well the cattle farmer looking after us assures us nothing. In their warm up game they were upset to only cause 3 Casualties against the Snotingham Snivelers. Sharper hooves is what their coach/musterer prescribes. All eyes will be on Nicholas "No Comment" Gosselyn will he go down the well trodden path of Doom Bull Quaterback development. You would be surprised to hear he had no comment on the issue just a Snort.

Quad City Slappers

The Deserted Isles is know for its love of the Four Nations style of play and it is fantastic to see a Four Nations side once again touring the Isles bringing the pure game to the people. Will they enjoy success? Oh my goodness no! Surely not but the fans will turn out in their tens. Jacob Coper is their captain and talisman in stark contrast to Gosselyn we couldn't stop him talking.

[SL]ap Dat Rat

Finally the Vermin Slap Dat Rat do most the Slapping they looked ominous in preseason but also squishy. These well drilled Rats look to follow in Rattus Invictus' footsteps and make a mark on the Osbbl. With Szik Vilepot leading the way who is to say they wont.

Well that is our round up the final thing to note is due to the number of teams the locals mustered one last prize for the bottom end of the competition.


The dead Rubber was what the animal rights protestors forced Silky to replace the Chickens with he was beheading on stage. Now imortalised in the trophy.

So much happening in Osbbl at the moment there will be the Sword Semi's and the Mullet Final all on its way. The Sucker Cup is almost ready to go post Sword final and that can only mean that season 7 is starting to recruit.

Who knows what crazy teams will attempt to lift all the wonderful trophies on offer.

Stay wild and weird peeps and come down to listen to our ambient beats.

Snake out.

Joined: Feb 17, 2008

Post   Posted: Apr 22, 2021 - 19:03 Reply with quote Back to top

the Sultan, as far as I can say, has a SWINGING character!

"la virtú sta nel cielo e nella terra, ma anche nelle nuvole e nelle stelle"

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