AFK_Eagle
Joined: Mar 12, 2004
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 01:42 |
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Yes, I realize this is the Obituary section, normally reserved for dead (or dead again) players. However, I couldn't decide on a more appropriate place to announce the retirement of the greatest player I've ever coached, so opted to put it here. I didn't think he was worthy of a Fumbbl front-page cover story; or rather, I think he is more than worthy, but I doubt others would. Anyways, I digress...
Today, we have the bitter-sweet sorrow of saying farewell to the most illustrious player ever to grace the Bloodbowl pitch under my coaching tenure of 650+ games. Sai, the ultimate example of the little guy who won't take crap from anybody, regardless of size, has left the Weapon Masters today after achieving LEGEND status in his 50th game. One of our team originals, who only missed three games in his career--once following a wardancer's leaping drop-kick gave him a concussion which would forever after plague him (-av); once when he misjudged his blitz timing and ran right into the fist of his intended target, knocking him cold for two games (MNG turn 2 of the match); and once when he tripped over his own feet, allowing a vicious halfling to boot him in the groin (niggle).
However, for all the pain he may have received in his playing days, be assured he dished out FAR more! Not only is he the all-time leader for casualties caused by a gutter runner in history, with double the cas of the next-most-violent active runner, but his very presence on the pitch caused drastic shifts in strategy by whatever opponent we faced. Countless are the number of opponents who were "knocked out" by this little hellion, only to remain in the ko box for the duration of the match. We know they were simply scared to face this monster again, and are still appealing to have credit for additional casualties added to Sai's record; the matter is awaiting arbitration.
However, this monster of the pitch has grown quite vain of his talents (rightly so!) and has become increasingly remote in dealing with his "lessers" on the team. Even the occasional Rat Ogre who applies to the squad has quaked in fear when Sai glares his direction! But while this has led to very structured practices with limited interruptions, more and more Sai has refused to play with the team on game-day. Yes, the doctors say his groin acts up frequently, and we can understand that. But we also came to the opinion that Sai simply grew bored playing with a bunch of rookies (the only two teammates he's had a grudging respect for were Katana III, now retired, and Shinai, his travelling roommate).
So it was with a heavy heart that we delivered (via proxy--not about to deliver this note in person, for fear of our lives!) retirement papers to this legend of the pitch. Word has it that upon receipt of this news, Sai went absolutely berserk, shredding every piece of furniture and exercise equipment in the entire training facility, even using his newfound leaping ability to put scratch marks into the overhead fixtures. After 20 minutes of devestation, he stopped, going absolutely still. Frozen in place this entire time, the messenger knew his time was up when Sai slowly turned his gaze upon him. Walking slowly, Sai came to within inches of the messenger's face (he had sunk to his knees as his legs gave way in fear), paused, then whispered, in a velvety soft voice...
"I will go. Keep paying me. Others will come."
Then he turned, walked out the door, and was last seen heading east, leaving all his possessions (or rather, the pieces left of them) still in his locker. (This story was learned only two weeks after, when the poor message rat awoke from his fear-induced coma.) The coaching staff is putting aside his accumulated pay for when he or his proxy returns for it, and are meanwhile trying to draft up plans for how to play without his presence intimidating opponents. Meanwhile, a shrine in his homage has been erected on the training grounds, with all the team's gutters (and even a few of the linemen/storm vermin) pausing to pay homage to this king of rats, wishing they could be just like him someday... |
_________________ Listen to Eagle! Eagle is good, Eagle is wise!
Founder of the E.L.F.--These elves will play anybody! |
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Macavity
Joined: Nov 23, 2004
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 01:55 |
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A worthy mention. A retirement of a player like that is as significant as a death! |
_________________ When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of childishness and the desire to be very grown up. -C.S. Lewis |
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Trif
Joined: Jun 10, 2004
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 02:00 |
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you jammy bastard. dauntless, horns, claws and RSC all on one player...... not to mention +ag....
he was a true legend, sorry to hear the loss, glad i never had to play him |
_________________ "no overgrown dog-monkey pulls an uzi on my family in the middle of a strip joint and gets away with it!"
"Now that's an esophagous!" |
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Tor_AlKir
Joined: Oct 10, 2003
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 02:27 |
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I don't get it. Is he your best player because of the skills he attained or the numbers he posted? I'd call him severly mediocre. While his skills may be somewhat impressive, they certainly didn't translate into anything of mention for a 50 game career other than helping the team win games. 24 TDs in 50 games? Great for a BOB but poor for a gutter. 19 Cas is great for a gutter but well below notable mention for a player with his skills. |
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Darkwolf
Joined: Aug 02, 2003
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 03:22 |
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who pooped in tor's cornflakes this morning? Congrats Afk, sorry I never had a change to play him and try to hurt him. |
_________________ Check out the latest Darkwolf "***Did you know?" in his bio! Each month, a new Darkwolf factoid!
http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=coachinfo&coach=768 |
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Tor_AlKir
Joined: Oct 10, 2003
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 03:32 |
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I'm not sayin the guy is a POS. Far from it, i'd let him play on my team anytime. |
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Wizard
Joined: Jul 09, 2004
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 03:36 |
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I had a chane to play him, but i couldn't hurt him and he caused a death when it was only Sai and 1 other rat left on the pitch... nasty little mofo - unlike the other 5-6 rats that i injured that game |
_________________ "As long as one person lives in darkness then it seems to be a responsibility to tell other people." |
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mUst
Joined: Jan 05, 2004
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 03:46 |
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Ponders about tor's statement, but anyway, he was what i call, KILL HIM player, and that means i like him, nasty little wanker, gogo him. who cares hes low on td, its the playerskills that are cool, and that he suvived, i for 1 (maybe not only 1, but likely many) would love to have killed fouled eaten maimed him. Congratz of makeing legend, and being lame too "lame as in lucky"
-mUst |
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AFK_Eagle
Joined: Mar 12, 2004
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 05:33 |
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If your definition of a gutter runner is a scoring machine, then yes, he was rather mediocre in that respect. But let me tell you, had I wanted to score with him and his agi 5, he could've easily set excellent numbers there. As it was, he served as a last resort scorer, always passing the ball off to teammates to ensure team success and development (as seen in his passing numbers, which were top-10 for gutters as well). Yet he wasn't my primary thrower, as his skills were suited for blitzing. His skillset would allow him to go 1v1 with ANYBODY, and woe betide the man he managed to get down to the ground. He was an all-rounder--were it not for his multiple niggles cutting his career short, he would've set very, very high records for the triple-threat--passing, scoring, hitting.
And in simple answer to your "what's special about him" question--he's my first ever legend. I've only had one other player pass 128 spp before death/retirement took him away; barely a dozen players of mine have passed 100 spp. He managed to avoid dismemberment (and dish it out himself) long enough to reach that level, and for that, plus his skills making him fill a roll nobody ever would've expected, makes him my favorite player ever. *sits back and stares into space, smiling* Ahh, the possibilities that'll never be realized. Maybe Sai II will push the envelope even further... |
_________________ Listen to Eagle! Eagle is good, Eagle is wise!
Founder of the E.L.F.--These elves will play anybody! |
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mstrchef13
Joined: Dec 11, 2004
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 05:34 |
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Having looked at the team roster, it's quite apparent that (1) Eagle is a coach that spreads the wealth around his team instead of piling all the TDs on one player, and (2) Sai was used 1/3 to 1/2 of the time as a passer rather than a receiver. To denigrate this great (if rats can be considered great) player because he didn't average 2 TDs per game is ridiculous. IMHO, of course, and I may just be speaking as someone jealous of anyone who can get a player and/or team to survive that long. |
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origami
Joined: Oct 14, 2003
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 06:05 |
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I'd have to say that he was the cheesiest rat to ever grace the bloodbowl pitch.
Tor_AlKir wrote: | great for a gutter but well below notable mention for a player with his skills. |
Exactly - it's great for a gutter. He got the dreaded claw/rsc combo rather late in his career. You also have to take into account that this little guy, while a hard hitter, hardly had the staying power of most players who get that combo. GR break quite easily. |
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tassel
Joined: May 04, 2004
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  Posted:
Mar 31, 2005 - 07:11 |
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I was honored to get a match against his team while he roamed. My team was of course left in shatters, and I guess the promised rematch won't feel the same, but it might prove less masochistic this time. |
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blitzwing
Joined: Nov 24, 2003
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  Posted:
Apr 06, 2005 - 01:07 |
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Why did you retire him, becasue of niggles? if so ridicoulous, he is awesome and should have been kept I loved that mutated freak). But, seriously a rat like that come around every 20 years |
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AFK_Eagle
Joined: Mar 12, 2004
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  Posted:
Apr 06, 2005 - 01:12 |
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Yes, but he added over 44 pts of TR by himself, and with triple-nigs he'd make it to only half the games on his own. So then I'd be faced half the time with the choice of a) play 44 TR lower without handicap help (or worse, giving up handicaps) or b) play without an apo for the game, which just begs for absolute disaster. There've been games I wished I still had him, but the team has continued and keeps winning, so we'll look fondly back on him as mine, accept anybody wanting to nominate him to the Fumbbl Hallf of Fame (hint, hint ), and keep on trucking. |
_________________ Listen to Eagle! Eagle is good, Eagle is wise!
Founder of the E.L.F.--These elves will play anybody! |
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Captain1821
Joined: Jun 23, 2004
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  Posted:
Apr 06, 2005 - 01:54 |
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He is the most impressive player I have ever seen! |
_________________ STATUS: CLOWN |
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