“The match started well, with Mick Jagger showing up on game day utterly wasted for the third time running. So the Coach benched him for the third tim running. So out numbered and out of their collective heads the Team took to the field.
Now as all the fans are aware, copious consumption normally begin matches by handing out samples of Sasha Shulgins latest creations and the product of Carlos's buisness empire before each match. However due to unforseen levels of drug abuse, the team had run dry! So instead they handed out Kool Aid and smarties. This made them no friends and someone threw a rock at Sigmund Freud, the bearded old coke fiend, knocking him out. Consumption played on without him, with Shulgin scoring in the corner after some lucky dodging.
There were no drugs at the second kick off either and rather than a lone rock weilding punter expressing his disaproval, the whole crowd came down and gave the consumption lads a seeing to. They had barely pulled themselves off the ground as Grax, or was it Splitlickety?, streaked through their lines like paranoia through a speed freak. One All.

The second Consumption touch down was scored by Freud fresh off the bench, he had a great game, devoid of his normal introspection and the random bouts of oedipal complex expression which have so far plagued his carrer. In fact he didnt lie down on the pitch and cry "Mummy" all game, which for him is an acheivment. The Vermin replied quickly however and the score was 2 all at the half.
The second half was a different baggy all together. In order to appease their fans the Consumption lads gave out their post match tranq's. This kept the crowd in their seats, unfortunatley it also kept the team in their seats. Hermans Verman scored two to one in the second half, simply too strong for the drug wasted minds and bodies of Copious Consumption.

Honourable mention goes to Jonny Rotten, for his fearless 'approach slowly, stare blankly' tactic of dealing with Rat Ogres. Blocked all match and he is still alive! (mostly, with these punk types its hard to tell)”