“The Strikers arrived today with their last game in the back of the mind. Heavy favourites to win, they only managed to eke out a draw against the Grizzlebeard Crag Crushaz. They were lucky to avoid the effects of a virus before the match and, after losing the toss, were forced to kick.

Despite a much publicised berating from the coach after last week's efforts, the Red Star side started slowly. This was probably due to the intensity of the BBC Heroes, who were determined to do some early damage to help lessen the experience gap between the two sides. Things started well as Jim Hacker sent Mao Zedong to the injured box for the rest of the game. Meanwhile, the Heroes' equal leading scorer, the Ghoul Tim Brooke-Taylor, fetched the ball and advanced up the field behind the Undead line. The Strikers engaged with Runners Vyacheslav Molotov and Klaus Fuchs attempting to flank the lines. With a mass of players pummelling each other in the middle of the pitch, Brooke-Taylor singled out the Strikers' leading casualty inflictor, Friedrich Engels, in attempting to break through the line. For a moment, too, he looked through as Neil, a tenacious little Zombie, moved in to protect his rear. Ho Chi Minh, the experienced Strikers' Blizter had, however, seen enough. He was able to peel off the main pack, dodging away from BBC Heroes' Wight, Graeme Garden and the Zombie Balldrick to blitz Brooke-Taylor, knocking him over and freeing up the ball. As if he hadn't done enough, 'Uncle Ho' as many fans have christened him picked up the ball and moved toward the touchdown zone. Before the BBC Heroes could get after him, a mistake by Jim Hacker left the big Mummy down and allowed Ho Chi Minh to make a break for it. As soon as he was clear, it was obvious that he would wait for the half as the players smashed each other in the middle and refused to chase. Black Adder was badly hurt by Vladimir Lenin who then knocked out Garden. Little Ronnie joined Garden. Jim Hacker, obviously annoyed at his earlier error, seriously injured first game Troll Slayer Leonid Brezhnev which will surely see the Slayer miss next week's game. In a highly suspicious incident before the half, the referee looked to be about to send off Neil for a foul which left Runner Molotov knocked out. It appeared that Brooke-Taylor slipped a small pouch of coins to the referee, who changed his mind! Meanwhile Ho Chi Minh wound down the clock and crossed for a touchdown late in the half.

Both teams were left with 9 as neither Molotov, Ronnie or Garden managed to rouse themselves. It soon became eight men for the Heroes as Lenin sent Balldrick to the KO Box. Lenin was having a blinder, and sent Brooke-Taylor to join him. The Strikers looked home now, as both the players that seemed capable of scoring for the Heroes had left the field. When Deng Xiaoping sent Neil to the KO Box the numbers were 9v6 and the result seemed academic. Despite a few fumbles, Klaus Fuchs ran the ball and, despite Lenin being knocked out and an almost impossible blitz by ZOmbie Richie, managed to secure the win with the Strikers' second touchdown of the game. The Heroes were clearly annoyed by this stage. Their fans got the ref, and so intimidated was the official that he refused to send off any Heroes for fouling. They took advantage by fouling Lavrenti Beria immediately following the restart. In a particularly retaliatory move, the Strikers' toppled the big Mummy Hacker and fouled him. Even in the dying seconds, they fouled, badly hurting the Mummy. Despite this ugly stain on their win, it must be said that the Red Star Strikers' win was a dominant performance. Never before had they won an SWL game by two touchdowns and it was the perfect way for the Reds to bounce back from a disappointing performance. They will no doubt be keenly watching the match between Regional rivals Skritzers Squeelers play te Nard Harpies, hoping that the Rats are depleted before they face them next week.

Twahnlow Votes
3 - Jim Hacker

The big Mummy caused two casualties and had a good game despite his mistake.

2 - Tim Brooke-Taylor

Rushed some yards and nearly broke through. I not for Ho Chi Minh's heroics, Brooke-Taylor might have scored.

1 - Neil

The Zombie was a constant pest to the Strikers.”