“News Team Not Just For Christmas

The News Team decided to visit an animal sanctuary that cares for abandoned puppies, so as to expand that part of their bio that reads "charity interests". It was going pretty well, with copious pictures of newsreaders holding, stroking, and lovingly teasing the dogs. "To those who say you can't teach an old dog new tricks", smirked McChokehold, reading a portable autocue, "well, just look at Crunchfight there, learning how to bathe a pug...what the..."

Crunchfight had got it desperately wrong, using napalm instead of water, and an inferior, value brand dog shampoo. As the wretched pug disintegrated, the eyes of the dogs lit up with anger, one of them slamming into McChokehold as he furiously tried to sign off in the way that the autocue was telling him to. On the plus side, his last words are on camera and will be submitted to You've Been Framed for the comical sight of John Snow Mercy's headless torso falling over in the background.

"This is Trevor McChokehold, signiOOOHGODHELPMEHELPMEAAAAA"



We had to pick up a replacement McChokehold on the way home from the stray newsreaders sanctuary. These things cost money!”