“The pillagers come over the crest of a low hill. Below them is a vale with a golden stream flowing through it. A golden tower sits in the middle of the glade. The perfect tower to go a pillaging. BUT what is that shambling around? Drunk guards?

Nope the sentinals of the glade are a crew of shambling undead. Undead? Bah, we can bash those guys aside and start pillaging. As the Pillagers let out their war cry, TO WAR!!!!! they notice movement at the top of the tower. A vile and evil necromancer resides in that tower. The Pillagers are momentarily discombobulated. A golden tower with a necromancer? dont they live in crypts, burrows or graves? If they do have a tower is it not dark, dank, mouldy and surrounded by a graveyard?

They come out of their day dream of questions as they storm into vale. Then the clear blue sky starts to darken. Storm clouds form up as if some dark necro magic has summoned it. And then the rolling thunder clouds start to crackle lightning the thunder is unbearable and then it happened.

The skies open up and a down pour of 1's, failed 3+ rolls, double skulls, skulls, failed pick ups, failed GFI and then the mother of all epic fail decends from the heavens like a conflaguration of DOOM. Rigor the Minotaur of death and destruction is buried in a pile of 6's. Take down on a 1BD with out MB. An avalanche of 10+ rolls decimates him. All you can see is his hooves sticking out of a pile of 6's that have buried him completly.

RETREAT!!!!!! the Pillagers take flight and find a cave to get out of the hail storm of 1's and leery of any more piles of 6's that might fall on their heads.

The Pillagers collect themselves in the cave.

"Man someone needs to go out and get Rigor"
"Man he is toast under that pile of 6's, his armor broke like a egg shell.:
"He is still moving, I see his feet twitching."

The Pillagers scan the hailstorm of dice.

"Dammit, follow me."

3 Marauders dart into the hailstorm, digging out Rigor, 2 more of them are clipped by the dice and fall by the wayside.

After a few turns the Pillagers are all back together in the cave. Half the team laid out in the KO box, Rigor is in bad shape. Riley is covered in bandages and moaning over in the corner in the fetal position.

"I dont think we are alone in here guys"
"Did you not check the back of the cave?"
"Dude when you are getting diced you dont take the time to check the backs of caves."
"Good point"

A shuffling sound from the back the cave gets the pillagers ready for an ambush. Then out of the gloom a dark elf appears.

"Greetings evil ones of the north. My name is Milasa and I to attempted to pillage that golden tower. But unlike you my team was decimated and forced retired. I alone am left."

"So you know how to ball?"
"I do good sir, my AG4 and agility access makes me a superior athlete. The yang to your ying of CPOMB."
"Well lads looks like we finally got a baller on the team, since none of you marauders can actually skill up and NUFFLE forbid actually roll a +AG."
"How much for your services Milasa?"
"70k up front and I will do my best to blodge up and elf ball the crap out of every one we meet."
"Good, you are hired. Now how in the name of hell do we get out of this cave and not run a gauntlet of dice."
"I know of path in the back of the cave. It will takes us 2 days to get out. But bewarned, we must travel in the underworld to make our way back to the surface."

15 minutes bringing up the rear.

"Dude that guy is like a really "dark" elf"
"Yeah, no kidding, he is a dark elf alright. But I dont know why coach is all amped up about it. He is just a lowly lino Darkie. He aint that great"
"No, you idiot, he is like really "dark" like that kinda of dark that slits your throat in the middle of the night to take your leg o lamb from your napsack."
"What? you telling me he is a dark elf assassin? Now that is diffrent, we could use a guy like that. How can you tell he is an assassin?"
"You are a moron, you know that? Hiring this guy is going to be a bad thing. Just cant figure out if for us or the other guys."”