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Match Result · League division
Match recorded on 2014-11-06 01:17:17
90k
1/1/0
Player Performances
td
comp
cas
int
mvp
spp
turns
pass
rush
block
foul
TOTALS
1
2
2
-
1
14
153
-
22
26
-
#4 Russell Bonobobaiter – Gouged Eye (MNG)
Player Performances
td
comp
cas
int
mvp
spp
turns
pass
rush
block
foul
TOTALS
1
-
1
-
1
10
135
1
18
37
-
#12 Parnelli Smith – Smashed Hand (MNG)
“
5th Game of the 8 first-round League games, and we have our first Ape non-win, as, almost(?) predictably, the softest team on the horizon, rookie Wood Elfs (without a Tree), bashed their Ape opponent to own the first half.
The Ape roster had only 3 gorillas (and 4 RR), so losing one BH and another KO'd Turn 3 was crippling. The unscathed WElfs changed from fast-score to stall then and there, and proceeded to KO two Lineapes next turn (1 via Surf), and another plus a Chimpanzee the following Turn (5) before surfing another Lino into reserves - 7 Apes out in 11 blocks (vs. 9 by the Apes) - and the rest of the half was no contest against the remaining 4 apes.
But all 5 KO's woke up for the second half, which became a mirror image of the first, with the Apes out-blocking the WElfs 26:11. An Elf Lino was KO'd and the first Wardancer Surfed Turn 2 (the old-fashioned way, no Grab involved), and 2 more Linos out Turn 4 (one KO, one MNG). Turn 6 the 2nd Wardancer got himself surfed into reserves, and the next turn a Lino and a Catcher were both Surfed out. With only 4 Elf Linos facing 9 Apes, the tie score was almost assured, but with no RR on either side, a low-odds -2 Blitz found Both-Down on the Wrestler Chimp ballcarrier to end Turn 7. 2+ for the pickup and score - was successful, tie game.
Turn 8 the WElfs' MA 8 Catcher woke up, so they set up for a OTS. "Good Coaching" got them a RR for the try, but Both-Down was RR'd to Both-Down - game over, tied 1-1.
As a footnote, the WElf Wardancer who scored also got MVP, and rolled... 11. An Ag 5 Dodger, 2+ Leaper will surely give all other Ape teams headaches!”
- A.P.E., Season 1, Round 1
5th Game of the 8 first-round League games, and we have our first Ape non-win, as, almost(?) predictably, the softest team on the horizon, rookie Wood Elfs (without a Tree), bashed their Ape opponent to own the first half.
The Ape roster had only 3 gorillas (and 4 RR), so losing one BH and another KO'd Turn 3 was crippling. The unscathed WElfs changed from fast-score to stall then and there, and proceeded to KO two Lineapes next turn (1 via Surf), and another plus a Chimpanzee the following Turn (5) before surfing another Lino into reserves - 7 Apes out in 11 blocks (vs. 9 by the Apes) - and the rest of the half was no contest against the remaining 4 apes.
But all 5 KO's woke up for the second half, which became a mirror image of the first, with the Apes out-blocking the WElfs 26:11. An Elf Lino was KO'd and the first Wardancer Surfed Turn 2 (the old-fashioned way, no Grab involved), and 2 more Linos out Turn 4 (one KO, one MNG). Turn 6 the 2nd Wardancer got himself surfed into reserves, and the next turn a Lino and a Catcher were both Surfed out. With only 4 Elf Linos facing 9 Apes, the tie score was almost assured, but with no RR on either side, a low-odds -2 Blitz found Both-Down on the Wrestler Chimp ballcarrier to end Turn 7. 2+ for the pickup and score - was successful, tie game.
Turn 8 the WElfs' MA 8 Catcher woke up, so they set up for a OTS. "Good Coaching" got them a RR for the try, but Both-Down was RR'd to Both-Down - game over, tied 1-1.
As a footnote, the WElf Wardancer who scored also got MVP, and rolled... 11. An Ag 5 Dodger, 2+ Leaper will surely give all other Ape teams headaches!”
This is the first set of observations from our studies of the Primative Ape Creatures known collectively as the Simyins. Our field researchers began testing by receiving the ball, the Simyins lined up but this line was easily broken. Our original plan was to see how they reacted to us showing our ball handling superiority by scoring quickly but one of our head researchers saw a gorilla picking his nose and decided to smash him in the face to see how he would behave. Unexpectedly this laid out the Gorilla badly hurt and following suit another of the team knocked out a 2nd Gorilla allowing the team to observe the complete collapse of the Apes at seeing two of their big guys taken. 5 more KOs ensued and we continued to observe the various cries of fruistration as we taunted them for the remainder of the half.
The creatures however show remarkable resilience and all Apes woke up for the next half and it was time to record the famed ball handling prowess of the Simyins. This was not as impressive as we had come to believe with the Apes requiring a reroll on their first hand-off attempt and then giving a 2d opportunity on the ball handling bonobo, however 4 dice was not enough to pop the ball and the creatures went into a craze breaking armour 4 times including our blodger and pushing one of our team into a nearby ditch, knocking him out. A 2nd pop at the ball, this time 1d resulted in the ball coming loose but in a gang of bonobos and after that the team were overrun. Some of our team got to up close and personal with the creatures and by turn 6 five of the team had to leave study area to be treated. Important to our project is to make sure we show these stupid animals our superiority when studying them so letting them score was not acceptable thus some high risk strategies were employed, which we are sad to report did not pay off although we did at least make them work for draw.
So a mixed first encounter with these stupid but dangerous beasts. The main highlight was at the end of the game the quickest of our students was able to mimic some of the techniques that the Apes used and with some hard study has now learnt to be more agile. This should prove to be useful for the next troop of Apes we are about to encounter. Initial reports are that this group has a Silverback, which gives us the rare opportunity to this mighty beast in action... and p*ss it off.”