“Hey ho, no-one died. Also, I felt I was putting up a reasonably good, competitive showing for at least 25-30% of the game, so maybe things genuinely are improving tactically. Unfortunately a lot of the rest of the time it felt rather like I was just lining my Elves up at the pitch edge to be helped into the crowd by the other team. In the end the safest option seemed to be for the remaining Elves to put on their famous folk-dancing display deep in the opposing team's half while the Undead hung around at the other end of the pitch waiting to go 2-0 up in the final turn of the game. Respect due to my opponent for not viciously trying to kick my team to death when he had nothing else to do. ”