“The ogres had a tough game, receiving the ball in pouring rain in the first half. The ball-carrier was knocked to the ground just on the right side of the sideline, and the ball was thrown all the way across the pitch by a drunken fan. In the end, the snotlings had two chances to pick up the ball and make a dash for a sweet 1-0 TD, but both attempts failed completely, ending the first half and any chance they had of skirting defeat.

In the second half the orcs dominated and controlled the pitch, knocking out "250 kg gutter runner" Wyndon early on and leaving the big guys desperately short of muscle. Despite throwing a respectable 34 blocks, the ogres failed to inflict even a single casualty on the greenskins, a painful reminder of the resilience of their homebrew but oh-so-sturdy armor.”