“Englands Legion won the toss and decided to receive. They were feeling pretty confident... the opposition coach Wotfudboy had had to pick the first person he could out of the crowd to make up the numbers while Beckham was out injured... this player turned out to be Heskey!

Well, at least it was even numbers of personnel... although Legion had an Ogre! Like ShouldhavebeatPortugal's last game, the opposition foolishly allowed their catcher to venture towards the end zone without protection, and it wasnt long before he was blitzed and KO'd. After having retrieved the ball Lampard made his way back in the direction of Legions end zone, and was able to complete the TD in the last turn of the 1st half.

The 2nd half brought a Blitz from the Legion side. Blitzes have been ShouldhavebeatPortugal's undoing in these qualifying rounds... and it proved to be again. Legion levelled through Phil Cooper.

By the mid point of the 2nd half ShouldhavebeatPortugal were losing personnel again... damned Ogres again claiming a casualty!.. however other Legion players chipped in... and the niggling SI that was received by Owen was not one the apothecary knew how to fix. The apothecary received a stethascope somewhere he didn't particularly want... and has been unable to sit down for a month since this game! Coach Wotfudboy also docked his pay!

However, a 1-1 draw looked pretty positive as ShouldhavebeatPortugal had possession of the ball deep in the Legion's half. However, this was not to be as, against all odds and without the backup of rerolls, a prone thrower got up, dodged out of a tackle zone, picked up the ball, Gfi, threw to a lineman at the half way line, who promptly caught the ball, ran over to a catcher, handed the ball off successfully and the catcher (who's path had been blitz cleared by his team mates) ran 8 MA's into the end zone to make a gut wrenching 2nd TD.

It was as if Zidane had tucked that penalty away again!

Things don't look good for ShouldhavebeatPortugal's last match. The thrower Beckham is back, but with a niggle, however, Owen, Campbell and Terry are out next match.

Coach Wotfudboy resorted into hiring a freebooter called James, and managed to secure the expensive services of the Mighty Zug who was passing through town at the time looking for work. ShouldhavebeatPortugal hope not to go home having lost every match in this qualifying group stage... if nothing but to save a little pride!”