“Well, this wasn’t going as planned. Just days after Coach Baron Bucky proclaimed that Rogmesh was the GOAT, things were starting to go sideways. The reason, the aspiring poet, In the Endzone, the blazing fast anointed thrower for Rocking the Nehekhara. In the first half, In the Endzone did a last second dodge out for the score. Rogmesh had of course did that at least four times in his career that he could count.

But it was In the Endzones’ play the second half that now had Rogmesh questioning everything that he though he knew to be true. He was so distraught as he pondered this existential crisis, he had to pour himself a stout beverage. Yes, in the second half of the game, In the Endzone dominated the game by doing nothing. Rogmesh didn’t think that was a real stat, but if not, it was a serious overlook by Hyper and it needed to be.

When Rogmesh was playing, he was an Orc of action! Natalie, still playing, was also a player of action. But Rogmesh had just witnessed In the Endzone control a game by doing nothing. How many times had Natalie impacted a game just because she was available to quickly counter strike? Rogmesh had never been able to affect opposing coaches’ play style and force a stall just because they feared Rogmesh would one turn them. But that is exactly what he had just witnessed. Coal Butte was starting to get the upper hand, but couldn’t press the advantage and score quickly simply because In the Endzone was standing on the other side of the pitch. You simply could not take the chance of the Nekekhara Nighttrain to pick up the ball during the next kickoff and just blowing past you. So, you settle for a boring draw instead of giving a player like the Rock’n Racer, or Trampoline Cali, or Natalie (CFO) the one last chance to star in a highlight reel, their boot in your face, as they score the winning goal as Trampoline Cali had done to Rogmesh in the EFL Cup.

Retirement sucked and Rogmesh found the bottom of the bottle after hanging up his cleats. He had found the bottom of at least four bottles of ‘Shine’. Last week, he had been upstaged by Twasnt the Snotling. His Rat Ogre Parking skit was a total flop and Bashnags’ Camila Dakamon drag show was starting to really take off in popularity after getting some support from the Knorne Stars.

The last thing Rogmesh had to comfort him, was his laurels on which he now rested. On the fantastic Wild Buck show, Coach Baron Bucky made the excellent case for Rogmesh. It wasn’t based on stats or trophies or great plays, rather how much you meant to the teams’ success and since Coach Wintergreen was a great coach. Hell, he didn’t even need Natalie. But now Rogmesh knew that Natalie could literally do nothing and still impact the game in a way he never could. So maybe it was Natalie.

But in this journey down an existential crisis that looked like a jug of moonshine, Rogmesh had found a kindred spirit, the Nehekhara Nighttrain, the Rock’n Racer. Who was the Greatest? Rogmesh raised his Mason jar and quoted The Pyramid Poet in his most excellent words that was far better than anything Rogmesh could muster.

"I kept everything inside and even though I tried
It all fell apart
What it meant to me will eventually be a memory
Of a time I tried so hard and got so far
But In the Endzone it doesn't even matter
I had to gfi or lose it all
But In the Endzone it doesn't even matter"
”