“"The Dead Don’t Stay Dead - And Apparently, Neither Do Career Expectations"
Week Two Coverage of the Clar Karond Dread Devils
by Tylo Greaves, Junior Correspondent, Naggaroth SportNet

If I die during this assignment, please tell my mother I went out doing what I loved: peeking into necromantic locker rooms and trying not to scream.

This week, the Clar Karond Dread Devils traveled deep into the cold, foggy swamplands to take on the Silently Scared, a Necromantic squad known for their quiet demeanor and not-so-quiet deaths. And undeaths. And re-deaths.

Final Score: 1–1. But that's only if you're counting points and not existential crises.

The Dread Devils looked flawless in the opening stages. It was all movement, misdirection, and mirthless cruelty. Lirith Bloodwhirl once again reminded the league that she is less a player and more a force, pirouetting through defenders like she was in a ballet choreographed by a sadist. The Devils' blitzers carved through the undead flank like it owed them money.

And then... Jaxson Gemedern, hulking flesh golem of Silently Scared, took a shot on a loose block, only to immediately collapse in a heap, neck twisted, life gone. If you could call it a life. The home crowd erupted, not in mourning, but in rage. Apparently, he was something of a fan favorite. One very large woman hurled a full cauldron of moldwine onto the pitch, screaming something about "blasphemous butterfingers."

That's when everything started going wrong.

On their next possession, Serith Nightscorn, a Dread Devils blitzer, charged into the chaos only to be met head-on by Silently Scared's savage werewolf, Xander Qaiyum. The result? A neck-snapping, skull-crushing, full-body flaying that drew cheers from the undead faithful and gasps from the three Dread Devil fans brave enough to travel. Mercifully, Serith died instantly, avoiding whatever horrors would have come after the wolf got bored.

Despite the carnage, the Devils struck just before halftime. A clean, elegant touchdown - chef’s kiss. It felt like the scoreline didn't matter. Momentum was on our side. Spirits were high.

Then the second half began.

I don't know what's in the water (or formaldehyde) at Silently Scared's home field, but it was like the dead forgot they were supposed to stay that way. Out of the tunnel lumbered Jaxson Gemedern, looking spry and stitched. And right behind him... was Serith Nightscorn. Same sneer. Same shoulder pads. New jersey.

You read that right. He's one of them now.

I asked Coach McCaw after the game what he thought about it, and as usual, he spoke like someone ordering plain toast at a haunted diner: "We played hard. We'll look at the film, make adjustments, and be ready next week. I did see someone from the stands bring a satchel full of scrolls down toward their sideline, though. That seems... worth noting."

Indeed it was.

While the Devils struggled to contain a reanimated Gemedern and their former teammate - awkward - Silently Scared began a slow, crushing march down the pitch. The Devils, try as they might, couldn't break through. Time slipped away. Tackles slipped past. And when it mattered most, Kaedros Redvenom, the prince of promise, dove through a sea of limbs and rot to meet Qaiyum at the goal line. One shot. One chance. And... he couldn’t strip the ball.

Tie game. 1–1.

Frustrated, confused, and mildly terrified, I decided to take initiative. While the teams exited the field, I slipped into the Silently Scared locker room through a loose grate near the crypt-shower. There I found the satchel McCaw had mentioned, discarded in a pile of bone-scented towels.

No scrolls. No rituals. Just one crumpled scrap of parchment. Written in crude, shaky penmanship, it simply read:

"Try Wanting It More."

So there you have it. Ancient magic? Forbidden rituals? Soul-deep hunger? No, just good ol' motivational poster energy. Maybe that's all it takes to un-die and win blood bowl games.

As for the Dread Devils? They head back home with a draw, a dent in the roster, and a few lingering questions. Is Nightscorn gone for good? Or is this the beginning of something darker?

Either way, I'm booking a one-way ticket back to Clar Karond. I miss the screaming. It was less disturbing than this.

-Tylo Greaves,
Still Employed. Somehow.”