Justin Langer is perhaps the first Test opener in history to average in the mid-forties yet still be forever scrabbling for his spot in the side. Or at least that’s the perception: in a land of dashers and crashers Langer is seen as a grafter, a battler, only ever a couple of failures away from oblivion. The reality is somewhat different. Yesteryear’s ugly duckling is now a strokeplaying swan, racking up more Test hundreds than those national treasures Doug Walters, Ian Chappell, Mark Waugh and Bill Lawry, and scoring an eye-popping 1481 runs in 2004. Always an effective cutter and driver, he now indulges in unseemly crossbat hoicks from the first over. Together with his bludgeoning comrade Matthew Hayden, they have screwed up textbooks and record-books alike, making Greenidge and Haynes look like strokeless stonewallers. It is a miraculous reinvention. Clanged on the helmet by Ian Bishop on debut, Langer fought on to make 54, but played only eight Tests in six years. He returned at No. 3, as the selectors sought to mould him into the next David Boon - and for a while he exceeded even those lofty ambitions. After rescuing the unrescuable Hobart Test of 1999-2000 with Adam Gilchrist, then slaughtering a blistering 122 in Auckland, Steve Waugh called him the world’s best batsman. The feeling was mutual; Langer’s devotion to Waugh saw him nicknamed 'Mini-Tugga'. His bond with Hayden is even closer. The pair miss each other when they’re apart, exchange bearhugs in the middle, and give the impression always of two boys living out a dream. Still the knockers persist, but they should watch out: Langer may be short of stature but he is tall in enthusiasm (he's already written two books) and boasts a black belt in taekwondo. He has played only eight one-day internationals, something that bugs him no end, despite a Gilchristian strike rate of 88.88. With Langer, you see, perception is everything.

<a href="http://fumbbl.com/FUMBBL.php?page=team&op=view&team_id=150639">KILLED BY: Bob's Big Boys - Melonhead</a>