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School of Roundhouse Kicks
Roster [X2] Wood Elf

<img src="http://i44.photobucket.com/albums/f35/imrichbiatch/12_03c.jpg">


CHUCK NORRIS FACTS:

Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.

Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the probability of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

If you can see Chuck Norris, he can see you. If you can't see Chuck Norris you may be only seconds away from death.

Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.

Chuck Norris has already been to Mars; that's why there are no signs of life there.

They once made a Chuck Norris toilet paper, but it wouldn't take shit from anybody.

A blind man once stepped on Chuck Norris' shoe. Chuck replied, "Don't you know who I am? I'm Chuck Norris!" The mere mention of his name cured this man blindness. Sadly the first, last, and only thing this man ever saw, was a fatal roundhouse delivered by Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris is a man of few words. Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.

Filming on location for Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris brought a stillborn baby lamb back to life by giving it a prolonged beard rub. Shortly after the farm animal sprang back to life and a crowd had gathered, Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the animal, breaking its neck, to remind the crew once more that Chuck giveth, and the good Chuck, he taketh away.

Chuck Norris was the fourth Wiseman. He brought baby Jesus the gift of “beard”. Jesus wore it proudly to his dying day. The other Wisemen, jealous of Jesus’ obvious gift favoritism, used their combined influence to have Chuck omitted from the Bible. Shortly after all three died of roundhouse kick related deaths.

Scientists used to believe that diamond was the world’s hardest substance. But then they met Chuck Norris, who gave them a roundhouse kick to the face so hard, and with so much heat and pressure, that the scientists turned into artificial Chuck Norris.

When Chuck Norris’s wife burned the turkey one Thanksgiving, Chuck said, “Don’t worry about it honey,” and went into his backyard. He came back five minutes later with a live turkey, ate it whole, and when he threw it up a few seconds later it was fully cooked and came with cranberry sauce. When his wife asked him how he had done it, he gave her a roundhouse kick to the face and said, “Never question Chuck Norris.”

The chief export of Chuck Norris is pain.
New Team Page Beta
Player Ma St Ag Av Skills Inj G Cp Td It Cs Mvp SPP Cost  
1
Wardancer
8 3 4 7
Block, Dodge, Leap
Tackle, Dauntless, Strip Ball
  4 0 6 0 0 4 38/51 190k
(210)k
 
1 player  
Coach: cherry Re-Rolls (100k): 8  
Race: Wood Elf Fan Factor: 9  
Current Team Value: 0k Assistant Coaches: 1  
Treasury: 360k Cheerleaders: 0  
Team Value: 740k Apothecary: Yes  

Games Played:24 (12/0/12) |TD Diff:3 (63 - 60) |Cas Diff:-8 (4/1/1 - 8/2/4)
Last Opponent: Out for Blood