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Past Players of Cripples Unlimited
| Player | Position | Games | SPPs | Skills | Injuries | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 12 | Prince Albert | Lineman | 7 | 13 | Dodge | m, n |
| 4 | Humps Da Leg | Blitzer | 7 | 4 | Block | m, n |
| 7 | Bathroom Stall Lover | Thrower | 6 | 13 | Pass, Dodge | d |
| 11 | Road Pizza | Lineman | 7 | 1 | m, -st | |
| 4 | Fetus Fondler | Blitzer | 18 | 32 | Block, Dodge, Side Step, Diving Tackle | d |
| 8 | Overdosed on Tequila | Lineman | 14 | 16 | Dodge, Block | m, n |
| 11 | Strychnine | Lineman | 3 | 7 | d | |
| 12 | Monkey Lover | Lineman | 18 | 16 | +MA, +ST | m, -st |
| 13 | Spunky Humper | Lineman | 13 | 14 | Dodge | m, n |
| 16 | Jump In Mah Pants | Lineman | 26 | 18 | Block | -ag, d |