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Past Players of Everything is morbidly wrong!
| Player | Position | Games | SPPs | Skills | Injuries | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 13 | All Mine! v2.0 | Chaos Warrior | 23 | 12 | Block | n |
| 15 | I'm Mad! | Chaos Warrior | 13 | 12 | Block | d |
| 13 | All Mine! | Chaos Warrior | 10 | 10 | Block | d |
| 10 | Three Seas | Beastman | 5 | 0 | Horns | d |
| 9 | Wedding Idea | Beastman | 36 | 25 | Horns, Block, Guard | n |
| 8 | The Day I was Born | Beastman | 41 | 14 | Horns, Block | d |
| 7 | La Plage | Beastman | 27 | 40 | Horns, Block, Guard, Tackle | n, d |
| 5 | Pyjama | Beastman | 37 | 25 | Horns, Claw, Block | -av, d |
| 4 | La Petite Princesse Aux Seines | Beastman | 27 | 33 | Horns, +ST, +AG, Block | d |
| 3 | Mandarine | Beastman | 39 | 12 | Horns, Kick | -ag |
| 2 | Sick Philharmonic Body | Beastman | 21 | 6 | Horns, Block | n, m, n |
| 1 | Flying Saucer Attack | Minotaur | 27 | 56 | Mighty Blow, Thick Skull, Frenzy, Horns, Throw Team Mate, Always Hungry, Big Guy, Wild Animal, Block, Pro, Break Tackle, Guard | n, d |