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Past Players of Stoned Smoking Squirrels
| Player | Position | Games | SPPs | Skills | Injuries | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 7 | Art Garfunkel | Halfling | 3 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | d |
| 16 | Kurt Cobain | Halfling | 6 | 1 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | -av, d |
| 15 | William Shakespeare | Halfling | 6 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | d |
| 14 | Victor Hugo | Halfling | 5 | 10 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff, Sure Feet | n, d |
| 13 | Zoroaster | Halfling | 3 | 1 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | m, n |
| 11 | Jim Morrison | Halfling | 4 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | d |
| 10 | Friedrich Nietzsche | Halfling | 6 | 0 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | d |
| 8 | Carlos Santana | Halfling | 3 | 1 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | d |
| 7 | Bill "...but I didn't inhale." Clinton | Halfling | 3 | 2 | Dodge, Stunty, Right Stuff | d |
| 1 | Bob Marley | Treeman | 6 | 2 | Mighty Blow, Thick Skull, Take Root, Throw Team Mate, Big Guy, Stand Firm | d |