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B'ORCalona
P [L] Orc

 Based on FC Barcelona in Spain

Awesome player pics done by Tesifonte



STAFF

Prezzi-denter
Mr Greenback Skullnutta

MoneyBags Counta
Miss Lotta BigSumz

Direktor of Killin'
Mr Cloraform Fistflinga

Hed Coach
Mr Ramrutta Russo

Medik
Doc Choppa Tomakapainstoppa

Ass Coach
Mr Duwazz Dabossasez

Skout
Mr Lukknow Furdadandis


GRUDGES & RIVAL CLUBS
Note that most of these clubs have fallen by the wayside as they lack the stamina and majesty of this beautifully green club

Essetesford Town
Bloody game and coin-toss defeat in OBBA Cup 2nd Rd Season IV

Bristol Reavers
Rival Orc club and nearest pretender to B'Orcalona's claim to be the premier Orc club

Real Sociadead
Rival Spanish Club and coached by obnoxious guttersnipe that spreads malicious rumours in the press

ZKSA Mozzkva
They employ evil wizards to win in the last turn every game against B'Orcalona, they are also evil!!!

Fulham Fleet
Owed an absolute trashing after they caused the biggest upset in the OBBA Cup ever, despite B'Orca doing little wrong Fulham had drunk the cream of Nuffle that night!


Club Records
Record Currently Active All Time

Top Scorer:
CURRENT:Pedro Rodriguez 12
ALL TIME:Samuel Eto'o 16

Top Tackler:
CURRENT:Lilian Thuram 32  

Man of the Match:
CURRENT:Gudjohnsen; 9  

Top Fouler:
CURRENT:Gianlucca Zambrotta 62
ALL TIME:Cesc Fabregas 65

Best Win:
4 – 0 v BBC Internazionale Milano (season IV)  

Worst Defeat:
; 1 - 4 v Fulham Fleet, OBBA Cup 1st Rd Season IX  

Highest Attendance:
174,000; Season VIII v Oval Balls FTW  

Top Passer:
CURRENT: Hleb; 9
ALL TIME:Thiago Motta 17

Most Spp's:
Gudjohnsen; 141  

Most Blocks:
CURRENT:Lilian Thuram 564  

Most Rushes:
CURRENT:Gudjohnsen; 172
ALL TIME:Samuel Eto'o 426  



Career History
Season Achievements

I Did not participate as the team was still in pre-season training

II OBBA's second Season and the team started in Feeder League. Lead the group all the way until the last week where results went against them and they finished 3rd. The OBBA Cup saw the team go out in the first round against strong semi-finalists Mummywell. Team was still promoted to Conf North as money talks!!!!

III The third season saw the team win their opening game against Dynamo and Lilian Thuram laying a DE Lineman with a Crowd push. The season progressed reasonably well, though it was a tight division with several teams all finishing within 0-3 points of each other. The last day win over Hamburg Skeletons and the earlier win over BBC Internazionale Milano were considered the highlights of the season for B'Orcalona fans. Stayed in the Conf North. In the OBBA Cup B'Orcs went out in the second round after losing 2-1 to Daggers & Redfridge

IV The fourth season began with a narrow defeat against the eventual Conf North Champions "Moskova", though the team won all there following matches to finish in second place. In the Cup B'Orca made it to the second round going out on a coin toss following a 2-2 draw with Essetesford Town

V The fifth season again began with a narrow defeat against "Moskova", but the team battled through to get third spot in the Championship on TD difference over Sirius 1907'ers. Promotion to the Premiership beckoned.

VI OBBA PREMIER LEAGUE CHAMPIONS!! The sixth season saw the team go on an incredible 8 game unbeaten run in the league which saw them crowned OBBA Premier League Champions after finishing the campaign off with a 2-0 vistory on the last day against Sartosa Pirates. The previous game had seen the side remarkably overcome the nearest rival, Mummywell, 3-0 in a comprehensive victory. The season did see critical moments go the B'Orca way, but then in reality that is the mark of all the OBBA champions over the years, fortune favours the brave, and this year for once the Orcs were the bravest of the lot. Key players were Gudjohnson, Deco and Messi. All three were outsanding both offensively and defensively, but that should not take away from what is a rounded team performance with all players conrtibuting, even if it is just with their flabby ass sitting in peoples way like Guadiola does :P

VII Not a great season with disapointing results near the end gifting the title to Bristol, B'Orca's rival club

VIII B'Orca's worst season since entering the premier league. A dreadful result on the opening day where despite dominating the game, B'Orca were hit on the break and lost 1-0 to Daggers. Things improoved slightly and it looked like B'Orca might have a chance afterall, but the three games against title rivals were poor and it required a great win over newly promoted Watford on the last day to keep B'Orca up where they belong

IX A steadier season than Season VIII. B'Orca have this season found that they lack the required strength in depth to compete in every game. Amazing as this seem when considering that B’Orca are the biggest club in the world and have such a quality line up on paper; the reality is that each and every game the team is victim to a variety of horrendous subterfuges by opposing teams who love to use drugs and knuckledusters; repeated slanderous accusations by the collective press about B'Orca players, causing them to be held for questioning and missing games; dodgy agents causing friction between the two greatest Orc player in the world Gudjohnsson and Thuram often causing dressing room acrimony meaning that they will not take to the field together.The loss of Josep Guardiola and Cesc Fabregas this season has been a hammer blow for B’Orca due to the unique qualities these two players possessed. Indeed it is now time for a rebuild and a new Troll and gobo double act is sought to offer at least the threat of a TTM even if it is rarely attempted.Also it is now being speculated in the press that Coach Russo is losing his grip on the squad and even his mind as he tries to bring the massively talented squad with fantastic support back into the sort of form that they demonstrated in their title winning run in Season VI

X B'Orca's final season in the OBBA saw a 5th place finish in another poor season. A cash flow problem due to a scurrilous investigation into the financial affairs of the club saw the owners arrested and the club withdrew from competition

XX Oh Happy Days! The mighty B'Orca are re-formed and ready to add some star power to the un-bejeweled ranks of the OBBA. With a FF of 17 they still are the most popular club on the WORLD!!!

Season VI















Post Match Sequence
1) Check if player has done any of the following:
3 Touchdowns
3 Casualties
5 Completions
1 Interception
5 Fouls
Killed a player
Killed a player over 51 SPP
Killed three players of the same race
Killed a player by surfing them
Scored using a TTM
2) Update Stats and player profiles
New Team Page Beta
Player Ma St Ag Av Skills Inj G Cp Td It Cs Mvp SPP Cost  
1
Rafael Márquez
Black Orc Blocker
4 4 1 8
Stand Firm, Dodge, Block, Guard, Mighty Blow
 -av, -ag 97 0 2 0 18 11 97/176 190k
(80+110)k
  
2
Aliaksandr Hleb
Lineman
4 3 4 9
+AG, Dodge, Guard, Block
 -ma 60 11 10 0 2 4 65/76 170k
(50+120)k
  
3
Juliano Belletti
Black Orc Blocker
4 4 2 9
Block, Guard, Mighty Blow, Frenzy, Stand Firm
 n 68 0 2 0 26 6 88/176 180k
(80+100)k
  
4
Thomas Vermaelen
Black Orc Blocker
4 4 2 9
Block
 n 14 0 0 0 2 1 9/16 100k
(80+20)k
  
5
Bojan Krikic
Blitzer
6 3 3 9
Block
Guard, Stand Firm, Mighty Blow, Fend
   55 2 5 0 13 4 63/76 160k
(80+80)k
  
6
Javier Mascherano
Black Orc Blocker
4 4 2 9   1 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 80k
(80+0)k
  
7
Gudjohnsen
Blitzer
6 3 4 9
Block
Guard, Tackle, Mighty Blow, +AG, Strip Ball, Kick
   89 10 14 1 49 11 Legend
207
 220k
(80+140)k
  
8
Neymar
Blitzer
6 3 3 9
Block
Guard, Tackle
   13 0 2 0 0 2 16/31 120k
(80+40)k
  
9
Gianluca Zambrotta
Lineman
5 3 3 9
Guard, Block, Tackle, Dirty Player, Fend
   100 3 4 0 12 9 84/176 160k
(50+110)k
  
10
Luis Suarez
Blitzer
6 3 3 9
Block
   0 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 80k
(80+0)k
  
12
Ronald Koeman
Lineman
5 3 3 9
Dirty Player, Block
   32 0 2 0 1 2 18/31 90k
(50+40)k
  
13
Seydou Keita
Lineman
5 3 3 9
Dodge, Block, Side Step
   69 4 3 0 5 2 33/51 130k
(50+80)k
  
15
Andoni Zubizarreta
Thrower
6 3 3 8
Pass, Sure Hands
Block, Dodge, +MA, Fend
   37 16 8 0 2 4 64/76 170k
(70+100)k
  
17
Harold Goldsnake
Journeyman Lineman
5 3 3 9
Loner
   1 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 50k
(50+0)k
  
13 players  
Coach: Russo Re-Rolls (120k): 4  
Race: Orc Fan Factor: 8  
Current Team Value: 2270k Assistant Coaches: 0  
Treasury: 0k Cheerleaders: 0  
Team Value: 2270k Apothecary: Yes  

Games Played:101 (49/15/37) |TD Diff:19 (123 - 104) |Cas Diff:164 (164/128/52 - 100/51/29)
Last Opponent: Bristol Reavers

  For   Against  
Opponent Race TV SPP Cas Gold Score TV SPP Cas Gold Gate
Harlem GravetrottersNecromantic1000k150/3/070k2 - 11000k100/0/040k47k
Dynamo NaggarondDark Elf1110k122/0/040k1 - 11000k100/0/080k70k
Drakenmoor ReapersNurgle's Rotters1090k111/1/140k0 - 31110k182/0/070k51k
F.C. St. PauliKhemri1160k140/0/140k2 - 01090k50/0/270k58k
PSV Zharr-NaggrundChaos Dwarf1070k161/0/090k2 - 01300k50/0/060k76k
Lustria FCNorse1190k152/0/080k2 - 21290k192/1/050k68k
Mummywell FCTomb Kings1300k91/1/060k0 - 21720k112/0/050k73k
Timisoara DragonsVampire1320k172/0/050k1 - 31470k170/0/040k63k
Dynamo NaggarondDark Elf1400k152/0/150k2 - 11450k100/0/140k66k
Wolverhampton WonderdeadNecromantic1490k203/1/260k1 - 21250k170/1/150k67k
BBC Internazionale MilanoOrc1410k150/1/060k2 - 01650k91/0/040k70k
Chelsea DestroyersDwarf1500k122/1/080k1 - 11200k122/0/190k80k
Hamburg SkeletonsKhemri1610k171/1/160k3 - 11580k81/0/050k83k
FC KislevhagenElf1660k172/2/090k2 - 11600k110/0/070k105k
Daggers and RedFridgeNorse1740k162/1/030k1 - 21500k140/0/050k77k
PSV Zharr-NaggrundChaos Dwarf1790k192/0/020k2 - 31430k211/1/180k71k
ZSKA MozzkvaChaos Dwarf1850k50/0/060k0 - 11850k123/0/030k72k
Nuln Park RangersWood Elf1850k152/0/040k2 - 01500k70/0/070k71k
BBC Internazionale MilanoOrc1920k151/1/130k3 - 01330k80/0/040k69k
Daggers and RedFridgeNorse1990k174/1/030k2 - 11690k90/0/050k67k
Borussia SalzmundHuman2050k174/0/030k2 - 01610k80/0/120k69k
LarsonalSkaven2120k150/2/170k2 - 01160k70/1/070k85k
Bristol ReaversOrc2220k173/2/150k2 - 11930k131/1/160k86k
Essetesford TownAmazon2140k204/1/020k2 - 21910k170/2/270k98k
ZSKA MozzkvaChaos Dwarf1990k71/0/160k0 - 12150k144/0/120k87k
Daggers and RedFridgeNorse2060k201/2/150k2 - 11790k90/0/060k99k
InterRatzionaleSkaven2160k250/2/240k4 - 11270k111/0/050k77k
Essetesford TownAmazon2250k141/3/060k1 - 01660k60/0/170k103k
BBC Internazionale MilanoOrc2230k232/0/170k4 - 01100k70/2/1100k90k
Valencia Club de Futbol SADNecromantic Horror2350k122/1/060k0 - 21880k130/1/080k103k
Sirius 1907ersTomb Kings2380k60/0/040k0 - 02270k103/0/050k120k
Houston RatsSkaven2260k232/3/350k2 - 12110k120/1/080k133k
Oval Balls FTWHigh Elf2360k50/2/060k1 - 22450k190/1/170k139k
Maharak Dead Boys Under 21'sUndead2150k181/1/070k3 - 01930k81/0/060k96k
Valencia Club de Futbol SADNecromantic Horror2270k150/3/070k2 - 02020k51/0/130k137k
Real SociedeadShambling Undead2330k121/1/160k1 - 01810k50/1/150k117k
Houston RatsSkaven2360k172/0/330k1 - 12130k130/0/170k144k
Oval Balls FTWHigh Elf2270k183/0/050k2 - 02460k80/1/040k139k
Essetesford TownAmazon2310k110/0/020k2 - 11930k122/0/180k116k
Mummywell FCTomb Kings2350k262/3/220k3 - 02440k52/2/010k120k
Sartosa Pirates BBCDwarf2380k150/2/030k2 - 02250k91/1/040k133k
LarsenalUndead2440k213/1/170k2 - 01880k51/1/150k112k
Bolton WonderelfElf2550k143/0/040k2 - 01230k60/0/090k108k
ZSKA MozzkvaChaos Dwarf2630k111/1/050k1 - 32310k233/2/020k118k
Glassjaw StrangersNurgle2420k173/3/050k2 - 02190k70/1/140k103k
Mummywell FCTomb Kings2460k151/1/170k1 - 01850k93/0/050k131k
Shuddersfield FrownLizardmen2500k132/1/040k1 - 02010k50/0/050k131k
Oval Balls FTWHigh Elf2530k150/1/140k2 - 22770k170/1/060k162k
Real SociedeadShambling Undead2550k222/6/160k2 - 11950k70/1/160k139k
Wolverhampton WonderdeadNecromantic2610k124/1/030k0 - 22080k130/1/050k114k
Bristol ReaversOrc2620k91/2/050k0 - 12130k133/0/050k132k
LifrigPool F.CDark Elf2490k274/3/250k2 - 01720k81/0/060k122k
Wolverhampton WonderdeadNecromantic2610k143/2/040k1 - 22240k140/0/170k139k
Skar Bay Sharks FCHuman2670k101/2/030k1 - 01960k60/0/030k116k
Daggers and RedFridgeNorse2720k132/2/130k0 - 12230k80/0/060k118k
Football Association of WalesLizardmen2770k182/3/130k2 - 11760k120/3/030k111k
Bristol ReaversOrc2790k161/3/130k1 - 12470k90/0/020k126k
Oval Balls FTWHigh Elf2850k122/1/030k0 - 32860k191/0/060k174k
Wolverhampton WonderdeadNecromantic2850k100/2/050k0 - 11940k122/0/190k123k
Watford KhornetsChaos2860k193/2/150k2 - 12490k80/0/010k119k
Fulham FleetSkaven2840k202/3/120k1 - 41790k181/0/070k117k
AberdoomChaos Dwarf2900k201/1/10k2 - 02330k60/0/050k116k
Real SociedeadShambling Undead2940k133/0/160k0 - 12390k50/1/060k141k
Watford KhornetsChaos3030k121/2/030k1 - 02250k80/0/220k114k
Bristol ReaversOrc3010k101/1/040k0 - 12530k102/1/070k122k
AberdoomChaos Dwarf2920k120/0/050k2 - 11880k102/0/050k135k
Wolverhampton WonderdeadNecromantic2990k103/0/020k1 - 01750k152/3/070k109k
Mummywell FCTomb Kings2870k145/1/10k0 - 12360k104/0/060k93k
West Ham UnitedeadNecromantic Horror2850k70/3/050k0 - 12080k103/0/090k123k
Essetesford TownAmazon2900k162/2/020k1 - 12080k131/1/030k130k
Mummywell FCTomb Kings2860k162/3/10k1 - 12360k103/1/060k109k
Sartosa Pirates BBCDwarf2850k150/2/160k1 - 02460k82/0/050k151k
Essetesford TownAmazon2950k162/2/10k1 - 01780k90/1/060k116k
Arden VillaChaos Chosen2980k100/1/130k0 - 32310k224/0/070k154k
West Ham UnitedeadNecromantic Horror3030k91/1/00k0 - 22200k183/2/020k98k
Real SociedeadShambling Undead3040k60/0/010k0 - 32330k131/1/090k142k
Wrecking CompanyDwarf2380k50/0/050k0 - 21650k183/1/030k46k
Hajduk BlitzHigh Elf2210k192/2/220k1 - 21540k162/0/060k40k
Chicago BandagesTomb Kings2450k153/1/050k1 - 11970k163/1/070k34k
Vancouver WHITE WalkersShambling Undead2270k183/0/240k1 - 11500k112/0/120k37k
Tranmare RoversShambling Undead2240k152/0/230k0 - 11570k80/0/060k39k
ItsLich TownNecromantic Horror2270k172/3/070k2 - 01890k50/0/060k34k
--- Swampsea City ---Slann2270k92/0/060k0 - 21580k161/1/020k27k
Hajduk BlitzHigh Elf2100k141/3/020k0 - 21500k181/0/070k32k
Watford HornhitsChaos Dwarf2250k151/2/060k1 - 11950k141/2/020k35k
Madchester City FCLizardmen1970k256/1/090k3 - 01000k71/0/020k20k
EvercoldNorse2440k111/1/050k1 - 21480k170/2/160k28k
Philadelphia WAAAGH!Orc2060k121/1/040k1 - 11610k122/0/050k27k
Bath City BladudsNurgle2320k131/1/060k1 - 12300k132/0/030k27k
Tranmare RoversShambling Undead2340k212/1/260k2 - 01670k60/0/040k30k
FC KaiserslaughteringHuman2370k151/3/030k1 - 21990k131/0/030k36k
Bristol ReaversOrc2360k101/1/060k0 - 11630k121/1/040k28k
Glassjaw StrangersNurgle2270k222/3/040k2 - 01670k50/0/030k27k
--- Swampsea City ---Slann2380k131/0/170k1 - 01810k50/0/030k31k
Beitar JerusalemNecromantic Horror2400k73/0/040k0 - 22150k213/0/080k34k
Watford HornhitsChaos Dwarf2190k72/1/010k0 - 21840k171/2/180k34k
Barmbek BloodleticDark Elf1990k142/2/050k1 - 01870k70/0/050k36k
☩ Arsenal ☩Wood Elf2290k151/1/150k1 - 01440k60/0/010k25k
Fighting TalentAmazon2320k81/0/030k0 - 21770k142/1/060k38k
MFK LokomotivChaos Renegade2120k81/0/040k0 - 31830k222/2/140k33k
Bristol ReaversOrc1890k122/0/160k1 - 02070k50/0/060k38k