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Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Apr 19, 2019 - 00:46
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SWL Sphinxes from Mars Conference LXXVI
Game 3: Pyates16's Orc "Waaaaghton Redskins" Image

There were claims that Legends were a thing of the past in SWL. With seasons, players would get old and retire long before ever hitting the 176spp milestone. Impak however, has proved the doubters wrong, smashing the spp/game record to become a Legend last season. And promptly at season's end held out for more cash. After a season of destroying the Reggies, Redskins management were happy to hand over an extra 60k to retain their hero. A genuine allrounder, what would Impak do to Bravado?

Turn 2: Impak knocks out Dan Dan
Turn 3: Impak busts a cage to sack the ball carrier. Dodge 5+ [5], Gfi [6], Block Image Image rr Image Image
Turn 8: Impak busts a screen, and Scores! Image Image rr Image Image, Dodge 4+ [5], Dodge 4+ [3 break tackle], Dodge 3+ [1] dodge rr [5], gfi [3].
Turn 9: Impak injures the wood elf kicker (niggled)
Turn 12: Impak Scores! Dodge 3+ [4], gfi [1] rr [3]

2 TDs and a Cas. 8spp!

But nobody's perfect.

Turn 1:
Surehanded Impak fails a pick up. Dan Dan pounces.

Final Score: Bravado wins 3-2 (0/0/1 - 1/1/0)

Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Apr 27, 2019 - 01:24
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SWL Sphinxes from Mars Conference LXXVI
Game 4: Wex's Elf "Morning Breakfast Cereal" Image

Bravado 1700k, Elves 1500k. You know what that means... Eldril.

Dan Dan, my Ag5 leaping wrackle stripper, vs his hypnogaze. Who would win?

While Eldril was certainly on my mind. It was the no bench 2x mighty blow vs 13 players that I felt might be key to this one.

Drive 1 Wood Elves receive
Image T1: Fail to hurt any elves
Image T1: Eldril success Image, tackle hit on ball carrier blodge catcher Image Image
Image T2: Fail to hurt any elves. Well not quite true, dead Bravado lino from a failed dodge.
Image T2: Eldril success Image, tackle hit on ball carrier blodge catcher Image Image

Catcher badly hurt. Usually, so early in the game I'd wear the cas. I have precious pixels to protect after all. But, I really REALLY want to get to Prem, and felt a 9 vs 13 numbers disadvantage was going to tip the balance too much. So I used the apo.

Image T3: Eldril 1D hit on ball carrier thrower Image ball knocked free
Image T4: Eldril fail, rr Loner success, Eldril success Image, tackle hit on ball carrier wardancer Image

Four turns, four hits on the ball carrier. At least the numbers have come back, 9 each on the field (2 elves KOed)

Image T5: Eldril fail on the tree, didn't matter tackler dodges through the tree anyway, but snakes the gfi for the 2D sack. Things really swinging Bravado's way now.

Image T8: Touchdown

Drive 2. Again on the "result before pixels" wagon, I put the Tree and two sidesteppers on the line to prevent any chance of the one turner. RIOT! Payback for my last game? Elves more interested in hitting stuff and the ball doesn't make it into my half.

Half Time 1-0

Drive 3
Right we've seen the first half Eldril show. What can Dan Dan do?
Image T9: Dan Dan dodge 2+ [6], Leap 2+ [2], uphill Image Image. Ball stripped, wood elves swarm in.
Image T10 Dan Dan punched over, Av6 prevails. A 4+ pass to clear it well away from the wood elf swarm 4+ [1] rr [2]. Fumbled.
Image T12 Wood elves down on numbers again, Tree rooted and ball carrier completely surrounded.
Tree and wardancer deal to part of the wall, then Dan Dan leaps in to clear a hole. Leap 2+ [2], Image Image, damage that lino's back! Catcher dodges, gfi, passes (3+ after Eldril's pass block), Loner catches and runs it in.


Drive 4
Wood Elves rush forward. Putting 2tz on the ball. But the ball bounces away, and the Elves have an A5 thrower. The pass forward is successful. The Elf catcher runs 8 steps into Bravado territory. 9th step, no rr, [1], KOed.
Image T14 Dan Dan blitzes back and collects the ball
Image T15 Dan Dan dodges 2+ [3], pass 2+ [3]. Catcher catches, runs forward to hand off, catcher catches and scores.

Remember those season goals I used to do? "Win a match 3+" was a recurring favourite. Until I dropped it, as I got tired of all the failures.

Final score: 3-0 (0/2/0 - 2/0/0)

The key rolls stuck. This so easily could have gone another way. A lot to learn from this game.

Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: May 07, 2019 - 13:02
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SWL Sphinxes from Mars Conference LXXVI
Game 5: ArthurWynne's Wood Elf "Loec's Loggers" Image

A wood elf team with a bench? What is this sorcery?

13 wood elves lined up against Bravado's 8 (+3 jm). The skills on the opposition were nicely spread over the team. And there was sweltering heat. Surely I couldn't win the number's game.

Dan Dan, rediscover your mongrel please.
Turn 1 badly hurts the strip ball Wardancer (apo'ed)
Turn 5 leaps in and Image hits the ball carrier
Turn 6 picks up the ball
Turn 7 fractures a catcher's skull

Turn 8 Dan Dan is not the only Wardancer on the field.
Rillithel the Reaper starts a Blitz Action.
Leap Roll 3+ [6]
Dodge Roll 3+ [5]
Dodge Roll 3+ [2] dodge rr [3]
Dodge Roll 2+ [6]
Go For It Roll [3]
Go For It Roll [5]
Rillithel the Reaper blitzes Dan Dan:
Block Roll Image Image rr Image Image
Dan Dan is knocked out.

Half time. Heat exhaustion takes out the Loggers' Tree. 10 Bravado elves, thanks to a resistance to the heat and a babe assisted Dan Dan, line up against 10 enemy wood elves. Back to the Dan Dan show:

Turn 9 kills a guard lineman
Turn 10 knocks out the strip ball dancer
Turn 12 smashes the hand (mng) of a block guard tackle lineman
Loec's Loggers curl up in the foetal position. Dan Dan rests

Full time 2-0 (2/2/1 - 1/0/0)
Dan Dan 0 TD, 4 Cas (1/2/1)

Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: May 11, 2019 - 04:23
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SWL Sphinxes from Mars Conference LXXVI
Game 6: Balle2000's Khemri "Didgeridead" Image

After my last match, nearly two weeks ago, Bravado was top of the table 4/0/2. Looking good for promotion, maybe even a silver cup.

So why did I go into this game grumpy?

The last two rounds are against pretty bashy teams. Khemri, then Necromantic. With an 8 rostered player Wood Elf squad, facing bash is moderately terrifying. It doesn't take much to remove an elf, and though short-handed elves are capable of great things, it's still hard work. Oh for a bench!

So hopes were pinned on the bash teams beating each other up. Maybe removing a scary piece or two before they rode into Bravado town.

Forfeits suck.
Khemri vs Necromantic - forfeit win for Necro. No clawed thro-ras. No bashed werewolves
Norse vs Necromantic - forfeit win for Necro. No hammered Necro.

And just like that Necro sit on top of the table with an on pitch 2/2/0 record (plus 2 forfeit wins).

Grumpy. Forfeits suck.

I like the big games. Prem in reach, could seal it with a win, maybe even a draw. But this one, grumpy pre-match, grumpy post-match.

Wood Elves had a decent crack. Tree even used his Break Tackle skill to crack a cage and spill the ball for the first time. Down to 4 Bravado players on the pitch at the end.

Full time 1-2 (0/0/0 - 2/0/0)

No damage taken. Maybe a tad optimistic to hope that these soft Khemri would have murdered some werewolves anyway.

Everything to play for next round.

Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: May 27, 2019 - 11:33
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SWL Sphinxes from Mars Conference LXXVI
Game 7: mushoomy's Necromantic "Pugs Not Drugs" Image

Oh, it's him again.


A lot riding on this game. Win or draw and Bravado is guaranteed to make Prem. Even a loss and we're still in with a chance.

As is usual for these events, the chat screen is completely blank, all the abuse is verbal, hurled across the living room.

First Drive, Bravado receive, and are forced to score pretty quickly (Turn 3)

Second Drive. Blitz! Iolas rushes forward, goes for it to get under the ball, and catches it. Friends move in around, but Iolas still cops a tackling 2D blitz Image Image. RR already burnt on the wight GFI, we're in with a good chance to score and make a loss highly unlikely.
Dan Dan comes in for the Blitz to push the tackle Wight away Image Image, then a simple 2+ dodge away from a wolf [1] dodge rr [1]. Oh crap!

Final Score 1 - 2 (0/1/0 - 2/2/0)

Hopes rest on the Norse who beat Bravado in R1, doing the same to the other Wood Elves... or even a draw would do it.


The weekend after this disappointing end to their season, Bravado take a trip away from the Southern Wastes home to Wellington to play in a Table Top event. I've never won a TT tournament (mushoomy has won two!), and I've sort of pledged to keep trying with Wood Elves until I do. Part of entering SWL with woodies was to help train me up for this goal. Capital Shield 6, is my 5th TT tourney in a row with Bravado, the 1st being CAS5 a year earlier.

A strong field, with over half of the 22 participants travelling here from out of town. How did it go?


Every team was granted an "anomaly" selected from a table of mutations. Dan Dan sprouted horns.

4/1/0. Tied for top spot! Winner decided by strength of schedule.

Bravado pipped again.


And returned from the tournament to see ArthurWynne's Wood Elves lining up against Foad's Norse. Could the weekend end on a high? Come on Foad.... please.... a draw......

Final Score: Wood Elves 2 - Norse 1

Another season in conferences coming up.

Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jun 08, 2019 - 01:48
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SWL Fraud Squad Conference LXXVII

Season 77. It seems I wasn't the only one angered by Bravado's end to the last season. When the post season rolls were made, the team's two biggest stars decided to walk. The biggest star, Dan Dan on 39 games, only needed to roll a 3+ (2), demanded 60k to stay. As did Dean Martin, the big block tree on 33 games 3+ (2).

So, what to do? I'd pretty much decided that they both leave. Start a new season with a bench, new catcher, rerolls, spare cash, all the team bells and whistles. If I'd been promoted, the Prem bonus of 200k would have been tasty, but it's pretty hard to squeeze Dan Dan's 310k demands into a 1620k budget. Plus he'd be asking for 80k extra the following season.

However, I really want to get to Prem. Without Dan Dan and Dean, my next best player is only 34spp. A refresh without the superstar might be the best for the long term. But I want to get to Prem, and I think keeping him is the best way to achieve this. Dan Dan stays, kicker sacked, reroll trimmed, no bench, one catcher. 6 fresh rookie players. Still got an apo though. Even managed to keep my hobbled guard wrestle captain.

So, what's ahead for S76? (in order):

Image Secret Wasteland Love (Daudy) 1630k
Image Immortalis Inquietus (Faulcon) 1620k
Image Haunted All-Sorts (Nebula753) 1580k
Image Chrimean Chimera (Bojoaph) 1480k
Image Port Royal Poachers (pdarbs) 1450k
Image Didgeridead (Balle2000) 1560k
Image Skye Hoppers! (JoeKano) 1530k

Looks like a fun season.

Joined: Mar 12, 2011

Post   Posted: Jun 08, 2019 - 02:38 Reply with quote Back to top

Great updates Ramchop!

A wise man can learn more from a foolish question than a fool can learn from a wise answer.

Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jun 17, 2019 - 10:23
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SWL Fraud Squad Conference LXXVII
Game 1: Daudy's Dark Elf "Secret Wasteland Love" Image

Single season Dark Elves, fresh up from reggies and higher TV than veteran Bravado? How could this be? Dan Dan's 60k pay off had something to do with it.

These Delves had a bench! 13 players. And 2x Ag5 players. Surely my super star would sort them out.

Drive 1: First turn Dan Dan slaps the lineman kicker into casualty with a Badly Hurt. The rest of the drive went fairly smoothly, though a snaked dodge by one of their Ag5s certainly helped open up a gap for the T8 score

Half Time 1-0

Drive 3: Time for the pain to set in. Nine wood elves set up against the 11. After the first turn of the half we were down to 7.

Turn 12, time to strike.

Surehanded Ag5 carrier up against the sideline. A fairly easy surf, Disco Englert to leap in to cancel the assists (3+) followed by Wrackler Dan Dan dodging (3+ with dodge) and then leaping in (2+) to 1D push the blitzer into the crowd (anything but a [SKULL])
Pretty good odds, with the Team Reroll >68.5% chance of success!

So how did it go? It didn't. I only saw what could have been a turn later.

Turn 15, time for desperation strike.

Not by the sideline this time, so a push wouldn't cut it. Disco Englert to leap in to cancel the assists (3+) followed by Wrackler Dan Dan dodging (2+ with dodge) and then leaping in (2+) to 1D smack the blitzer.
Not as good odds, with the Team Reroll 54% chance of success!

So how did it go? Disco leap (3+) [2] team reroll [2]. Knocked out.

Delves score. And then I screwed up the 1 turner attempt.

Final score 1-1 (1/0/1 - 1/0/1)

Feeling rusty after the season break. Need to improve significantly for the next game.

Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jun 25, 2019 - 12:08
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SWL Fraud Squad Conference LXXVII
Game 2: Faulcon's Undead "Immortalis Inquietus" Image

There is no coach on FUMBBL who I have a worse record against than Faulcon.
and all but one was with a margin of >1.

So I wasn't going to get my hopes up.

Touchdown A: Turn 4
No mucking around here anymore, just score.

Touchdown B: Turn 8
Dan Dan had (2+) leapt in to allow for a chain push that had the m8 ball carrier ghoul out of range. All hopes pinned on the zombie. And after a bit of punching the catcher took a ImageImageImage from the block mummy, then a ImageImageImage from the zombie. The push came with the reroll, and the zombie caught the hand off.

Touchdown C: Turn 11
Faulcon wasn't about to settle for a draw.

Touchdown D: Turn 13
Will I ever learn that the sideline is not my friend? Dan Dan needed a (3+) catch in two tackle zones then a leap and a run.

Touchdown E: Turn 16
A deep kick and a blizzard, but how could 4 elves stop the undead advance? Dan Dan knocked over one ghoul then moved in to try and cover the other. Some punching on sidestepper Disco Englert didn't free up the ghoul, so the handoff went to the open wight.

A: Success
B: Tripwire endzone
C: Success
D: Success
E: Wight failed the catch

Final Score 2-1 (0/0/1 - 3/2/1). Victory!

Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jun 29, 2019 - 08:10
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SWL Fraud Squad Conference LXXVII
Game 3: Nebula753's Human "Haunted All-Sorts" Image

Isn't this a lovely player?:

Clearly a target before Turn 8. Except the sneaky bugger didn't set foot on the field in the first drive.

Drive 1: Wood elves receive.

New tree Douglas Maple seemed to spend the bulk of the game punching Boris the ogre. Eight times he took a swing at the ogre. Knocked him over a few times too. Never broke armour. On the third attempt Image Image Douglas got himself bashed in the process, serious concussion (-av). Apo success.

Under pressure, Bravado scored turn 4.

Drive 2: Humans receive

<ramchop> dan dan appears to have forgotten how to hurt people
<Nebula753> poor DanDan

Image Turn 5. A gap in the defence. Guard catcher comes in, Dan Dan leaps in and smacks the ball carrier Image Image Thrower badly hurt, one half of the 1-turner combo out.

Image Turn 5. Blitzer comes in to put an assist on the sidestepper Dancer next to the ball. Blitzer comes in to hit him. Sidesteps onto the ball, assisting blitzer catches it.

Image Turn 6. A bit of pushing about, and the guard catcher again gets next to the ball carrier. Dan Dan leaps in and smacks the ball carrier. Image Image. Blitzer knocked over, ball bounces into the hands of Ruler!

Image Turn 6. Ruler runs!

Image Turn 7. Ruler is fast, but so is Disco Englert (Ma9). The tackling wardancer chases, burns a gfi on the way, and hits the speedy catcher Image Image

Image Turn 7. Blitzer comes in to free Ruler from the tackler. Image Image rr Image Image
An interesting reroll decision. Two gfis to score with no reroll vs a 2+ dodge and 2 gfis to score with reroll?
Second gfi fails

Halftime 1-0

Drive 3: Humans receive

Dan Dan smacks the ball carrying Ruler on Turn 9. Niggles him! Apo downgrades this to a MNG, but he's still gone. Dan Dan picks up the ball.
Dan Dan gets smacked. Image Image.
Dan Dan strips the ball, and it bounces into his hands.
Dan Dan gets smacked. Image and knocked out.
Humans get the ball back, pass, run, score on turn 5.

Drive 4: Wood elves receive.

Having no rerolls is always scary.

Saved from an embarrassing potential surf by a bone head Ogre. Dan Dan with 3 cas already, needs to be the hero once more. Is he up to the task?


Caging Rollins pushes the catcher out of, and into the way.
Dan Dan takes the handoff (2+) [5], then blitzes the catcher seeking a push and a step closer to the endzone. Image Image
Leap (2+) [3]
Dodge (2+) [6]
Dodge (2+) [5]
Easy. Well worth the retirement blackmail.

Final score 2-1 (2/1/0 - 1/1/0)

Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jul 07, 2019 - 04:27
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SWL Fraud Squad Conference LXXVII
Game 4: Bojoaph's Nurgle "Chrimean Chimera" Image

Nurgle! Look what the horrid Chimera did to Daudy's dark elves:
Poor Daudy.

I was a a tiny bit worried about this game. Terrified, might be a more accurate description.

Drive 1
Wood Elves receive, and held out until a turn 4 score

Drive 2
Don't you just love what elves can do?:

Bravado with the speed ran up and around. The pestigors did it in a straight line. T8, needed a 2D push, a 2+ pass, and a 2+ catch to go into the half 2-0 ahead. After round 3 I had spent all my treasury to secure a 3rd team reroll. Needed a 4th.

Half Time: 1-0

Drive 3
Nurgle grind. Wood elves were leaving the field in droves. By T14, there was just captain courageous Caging Rollins as the only elf left not running screaming away from the nurgle pain.

Rollins stood up, dodge 4+ [6], dodge 5+ [6], gfi [3].
-2D block Image Image

Pushes the pestigor into the endzone.

Drive 4
Thanks to Rollins' heroics, Bravado had two turns to win it.
Thanks to a Riot, they didn't.

Look what the horrid Chimera did to Bravado:

Look what Bravado did to the horrid Chimera:

Final score 1-1 (0/2/2 - 4/0/0)

Joined: Aug 28, 2008

Post   Posted: Jul 07, 2019 - 13:49 Reply with quote Back to top

That's two games in a row that the Chimera have had a very late riot potentially help them. After last week where they beat us up into a shape much worse than even the diagram indicates, T16 a riot appears and they suddenly have two turns to potentially score a winner. This week it's the other way around!

Rowdy crowds are a fact of every Bloodbowl game, but the fact we still rely on corrupt referees to time keep through these events is part of the reason why Bloodbowl will never be accepted as a mainstream professional sport!


Joined: Oct 12, 2013

Post   Posted: Jul 18, 2019 - 12:42
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SWL Fraud Squad Conference LXXVII
Game 5: pdarbs' Dark Elf "Port Royal Poachers" Image

Dark Elves, av8 and with a merc means outnumbered from the start. Also, a bribe! What a sicko!

Drive 1
Dark Elves receive. Bravado stuttered. With the delf runner waiting out the half back field, Bravado just sat back and waited for the opposition to come to them. Dan Dan blitzing out and running back, doing no damage. Eventually the dark elves came forward and the wood elves failed to do anything about it. T8 score.

Drive 2
Bravado 1 turn bs.

Half Time 1-1

Drive 3
Despite outnumbering the dark elves, Bravado got pressured and felt forced to score on T5.

Drive 4
Runner staying back and waiting again. This time Bravado don't sit back. Nearly every one charges forward on T7. Which means all the dark elves need to do is get it past the screen, without a reroll.


Pass scatters, Dan Dan collects, passes, wood elves score.

Full time 3-1 (0/0/0 - 0/1/0)

Zero turnovers helps
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