“The 'Saws went into this match slight favourites, despite the relative strength of this tough looking human side. However, with news that a victory could mean the team has a positive TD difference for the very first time, the players were pumped up and tore into a stunned Linkeboda Boys.

Coach Diddyboy was initially distraught as he watched the orcs rip his players apart. The best (or worst) moment of the match was came after a foul on an orc blitzer by the sidelne. Black orc Curator sensed an opportunty to retaliate in style and smashed shoulder first into catcher Joel, who stood in front of the fouler, lineman Sulan. The impact was so severe that hit split the human's rib cage clean in two with an almighty crack, instantaneously killing him. The catcher's limp body hit Sulan hard enough to knock him into the crowd. Unfortunately for him it was the stand occupied by the orcs and he was lucky that he flew back with enough force to stun several crowd members and escape with a light enough beating that he only had to sit out the rest of this match.

Having already killed a guy earlier in the game - who was miraculously saved by the apothecary - Curator becomes the first Chainsaw player to have killed two in a single match, as well as the first to injure two with a single block.

By now philosophical, Coach Diddyboy shrugged his shoulders and told Coach Chainsaw to kill as many as he can of his team. As the violence further unfolded, the greenskins left the crumpled dead body of super star blitzer Macke in enough of a mess to warrant a brush to sweep it up. Emerging star Wobin also took a huge hit which he will never fully recover from. It was a very heavy game for the human team who will take a long time to recover.

They did manage to end the career of Bowser Jr, who had so far proved so poor a thrower that Coach Chainsaw declined to send on the apothecary despite the increasingly obvious futility of keeping him around for improbable another injury.

At the end of the game, with a massive 4-0 thumping, Team Chainsaw finally have a positive TD difference and can no longer be ashamed of their record.”