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Oh planate lump of an elf
beneath my crab filled gut
with thy crackle of bones
and the ill-pointing foot

A cloud in the guise
of a rhino I see
lazily bumble aloft
what somnolent scene

Distrupted in full
by your odious wails
a calamitous plot
to ruin my day

What iniquity has
the grass so frog-green
wrought upon you to warrant
a clawing so mean

The long jagged crease
in the wake of your hand
is a terrible crime
and demands reprimand

And so you shall have
for as long as you live
the grace of a moose
on a rotten fruit spree

Riposte before the crime
you whine that it's wrong
an ethical quandary
for me to poo on
New Team Page Beta
Player Ma St Ag Av Skills Inj G Cp Td It Cs Mvp SPP Cost  
1
Troll
4 5 1 9
Always Hungry, Loner, Mighty Blow, Really Stupid, Regeneration, Throw Team-Mate
Guard, Grab, Multiple Block, Thick Skull
  42 0 0 0 13 5 51/76 190k
(110+80)k
 
2
Black Orc Blocker
4 4 2 9
Block
  18 0 2 0 0 0 6/16 100k
(80+20)k
 
3
Black Orc Blocker
4 4 2 9
Block, Mighty Blow, Break Tackle
  43 0 2 0 10 1 31/51 140k
(80+60)k
 
4
Black Orc Blocker
4 5 2 9
Block, Mighty Blow, Guard, +ST, Stand Firm
  42 0 0 0 18 8 76/176 210k
(80+130)k
 
5
Black Orc Blocker
4 4 2 9
Block, Guard, Mighty Blow, Tackle
  43 0 2 2 9 6 58/76 160k
(80+80)k
 
6
Blitzer
8 3 3 9
Block
+MA, Tackle, +MA, Sure Hands, Juggernaut
  43 0 23 0 5 1 84/176 200k
(80+120)k
 
7
Blitzer
6 3 3 9
Block
Tackle, Grab
  11 0 3 0 1 1 16/31 120k
(80+40)k
 
8
Blitzer
7 3 3 9
Block
Guard, +MA, Mighty Blow
  43 2 4 0 3 4 40/51 150k
(80+70)k
 
9
Blitzer
6 3 3 9
Block
Tackle, Guard, Grab
  42 0 5 1 6 2 39/51 140k
(80+60)k
 
10
Lineman
7 3 3 9
Block, Dodge, +MA, +MA
  42 1 7 0 5 4 52/76 160k
(50+110)k
 
11
Lineman
5 3 3 9
Kick
  19 0 0 0 0 2 10/16 70k
(50+20)k
 
12
Lineman
5 3 3 9   3 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 50k
(50+0)k
 
13
Lineman
5 3 3 9   0 0 0 0 0 0 0/6 50k
(50+0)k
 
13 players  
Coach: Archpeasant Re-Rolls (120k): 4  
Race: Orc Fan Factor: 8  
Current Team Value: 2130k Assistant Coaches: 1  
Treasury: 320k Cheerleaders: 1  
Team Value: 2130k Apothecary: Yes  

Games Played:43 (22/9/12) |TD Diff:17 (59 - 42) |Cas Diff:62 (53/29/14 - 24/8/2)
Last Opponent: Blood for the Bloodbank

  For   Against  
Opponent Race TV SPP Cas Gold Score TV SPP Cas Gold Gate
Sewer ElvesSkaven990k224/0/070k3 - 11020k80/0/040k19k
Deep ElfsElven Union1080k244/1/320k1 - 11010k90/0/050k9k
PuzzolentosNurgle1130k90/2/060k0 - 11170k101/0/080k22k
Carabanchel BCElven Union1150k120/2/010k1 - 21090k181/1/090k24k
Orcses of Uisge BeathaOrc1250k110/0/060k2 - 01140k70/0/020k21k
Green BoyzorzOrc1280k121/1/060k1 - 01300k50/0/020k20k
Wolf Blitzer's Wolf BlitzersDark Elf1370k111/0/080k1 - 11370k90/0/070k27k
Altdorf ApocolypseHuman1450k102/0/020k0 - 11490k80/0/070k27k
TreesWood Elf1460k191/2/160k2 - 01590k60/0/060k34k
Old Ones 1st BankSlann1490k191/2/070k2 - 01520k91/0/050k30k
Ball Redistribution AgencyChaos Renegade1560k233/1/170k2 - 01460k151/0/030k18k
Your Teeth are in my NeckVampire1520k111/0/020k1 - 21500k120/0/050k37k
Clan CrittersarusSkaven1650k172/1/040k2 - 11570k132/0/030k27k
Stocking GuysWood Elf1720k192/2/050k2 - 11500k90/0/030k29k
WaterbowlersElven Union1730k161/0/170k2 - 11730k100/0/050k35k
PuzzolentosNurgle1730k140/1/270k1 - 01700k71/0/040k32k
Run n ShootElven Union1740k130/1/080k2 - 01720k61/0/050k34k
FrogabillySlann1760k193/0/080k2 - 11770k101/0/020k39k
Green Hairy MonstersOrc1810k151/1/080k2 - 01730k101/1/030k28k
Natures BestWood Elf1730k141/0/050k2 - 01670k91/0/040k34k
I Say You FellowsDark Elf1890k90/0/040k1 - 21840k131/0/070k31k
Stocking GuysWood Elf1930k122/0/060k1 - 11710k90/0/070k31k
Samovar SinensisWood Elf1920k101/0/020k1 - 21980k162/0/060k31k
ChainChaosChaos Chosen1910k150/2/070k2 - 01800k130/3/050k30k
Clan Moulder and ScullySkaven1700k134/0/020k0 - 12430k121/0/070k27k
Not Bloody LikelyVampire1820k152/0/030k2 - 11770k100/0/070k41k
Slaughterhouse FrogsSlann1860k172/1/070k2 - 21590k140/0/050k23k
I Say You FellowsDark Elf1870k111/0/060k1 - 21840k131/0/060k37k
ArthurWood Elf1910k71/0/010k0 - 12060k131/1/050k35k
Under the Milky WayVampire1740k151/1/080k2 - 01760k50/0/060k22k
Lolth's PawnsDark Elf1840k121/1/030k1 - 11840k121/0/040k33k
Rainbow Warriors or The BoosWood Elf1840k70/1/050k0 - 31910k180/0/160k39k
Bhagar BloodsuckersVampire1850k201/1/260k2 - 11830k111/0/060k22k
Ulthuan DragonridersHigh Elf1880k162/1/170k1 - 11960k121/0/050k24k
Einfach ElfenElven Union1890k91/1/070k0 - 11860k90/0/070k30k
Naggarond City chiefDark Elf1880k122/0/040k1 - 11810k130/1/020k34k
Birgingham BrigadeDark Elf1700k151/0/180k2 - 11780k80/0/030k27k
News TeamDark Elf1900k80/0/050k1 - 01860k91/0/040k38k
Blue MasochistsWood Elf1930k140/1/050k2 - 41720k241/0/050k36k
Nuffle Can Suck ItVampire1920k150/1/070k2 - 21940k120/1/070k42k
Frutti di BoscoWood Elf1970k150/1/150k2 - 11930k100/0/030k35k
SubBlackDark Elf1980k92/0/070k0 - 01960k91/0/030k34k
Blood for the BloodbankVampire2010k131/0/180k2 - 11830k91/0/150k23k