"Hey Great Gobbo, I think my Hungry Hungry Halfling is broken, it doesn't squeal when I hit it anymore."

"Yeah mine too, see? Mine az a krakk in it."

"Where?"

"Dere in it's skull."

"Where it's brains are leaking out? Yeah I see it. Maybe you shouldn't have swapped the little hammer supplied with the game for that huge club?"

"It didn't say yer couldn't swap der likkle ammer fer a big club did it? I chekked der instrukshunz an everyfin."

"Well I guess they just don't make games like they used to."

"Wot yew on abowt, korse dey do. Santa ent changed der way iz elves mek toyz, an I doan't like der insinuashun dat Santa produces inferior kwality products so wotch yer mouth."

"Since when did you become best mates with Santa? I couldn't think of anyone more different to you than him."

"Rubbish, me an Santa iz almost identikal."

"How? Give me one example of how you are anything like Santa."

"We both break inter people's houses and drink dere sherry, gud enuff fer yer?"

"So what are we going to play now? I think Trevor is too tired for another game of Monopoly."

"STRIP Munoply."

"Whatever. I still think you should have got at least one of the other editions of Monopoly to spice things up a little."

"Listen mush, dere iz moar spice in wun game o strip Munoply wiv me den dere iz in an orcs boot. Wot ovver edishuns of Munoply iz der?"

"Well there is the Empire edition, the Elven edition, the Dwarf edition, pretty much every race has their own edition of Monopoly."

"So dere iz a Gobbo edishun?"

"Yes, it's like regular Monopoly except all the locations are brown because you all live in horrible dingy caves and the win second place in a beauty contest card has been removed for being too implausible."

"Woz dat ment ter be funny? Yew iz on fin ice mush. Ow bowt a game o strip Trivial Pursuit?"

"No it's too easy, you only have the kids edition."

"Alright I will mek up sum kweshtuns fer yew...ang on a minit, dat gives me an idea!"

"What?"

"A Fumbbl edishun o Trivial Pursuit! An der timin iz perfekt, all der koaches iz gatherin fer der Fumbbl Cup an xmas iz kummin! I kan nokk up a few kopies an flog em at der cup an mek a fortune!"

"You think you can come up with enough questions in that short amount of time?"

"Eezy, ere yew just ang tite fer a bit whilst I gets me finkin kap on an me finkin grog inside me, dis iz gunna be ace!"

So we throw a couple of logs onto the fire and wait for about an hour, occasionally interrupted by excited shouts from the next room and also the sound of hammering which seems like an odd way to write a few question cards, but nevertheless eventually the Great Gobbo comes bounding into the room clutching a sheet of parchment.

"Rite, yew reddy fer dis?"

"I am not taking off any of my clothes."

"Korse yew ent, it ent finished yet. Dis iz just a potato type."

"Prototype."

"Yew sez potato, I sez potato, whatevva, it doan't matta. Rite kweshtun wun. Oo iz der besterest koach on Fumbbl?"

"Ooh that's a tough one. I read a forim post only recently discussing this very topic."

"Rong it'z me. Kweshtun too. Oo iz der most andsomest koach on Fumbbl?"

"That's not a proper question."

"Rong, itz me agen. Kweshtun free..."

"Hang on a minute are all the answers to the questions you?"

"Kweshtun free, which koach az der biggest di.."

"NO! Look you little green idiot, the questions can't all be about you. Also there are six different categories.."

"Cat orgies?"

"No, categories! It means types of question, for example you need questions concerning geography, entertainment and scrying, history, science and nature, art and literature and sport and leisure. Now go away and try again."

Another hour passes, at one point we swear we can hear the distressed meowing of a feline, until once again the Great Gobbo returns.

"Rite I az anuvva card ere, yew reddy fer tek too?"

"I suppose it can't be any worse than take one."

"Okay kweshtun wun, joggraffy. Where iz me kave?"

"I thought I said the questions can't all be just about you!"

"Fine! Kweshtun too, dis wun iz entertainment. Wot iz entertainin bowt Dwarves playin Blud Bowl? Nuffin."

"Well I suppose that is better but..."

"Kweshtun free, ooh a science an nature wun fer yer! If a tree fallz in a forest ow many Wood Elves az a sad wank over it?"

"No no no! What is wrong with you? The questions need to have a specific answer to them."

"It does, der answer iz all o dem."

"Look, just bugger off for a bit and I will write the questions ok?"

"Nuffin rong wiv me kweshtuns."

"Maybe we'll keep them for the Goblin edition of the game ok?"

"Fine. Rite i'll leave yew to it. By der way ow many katz does yer need fer an orgy?"

"Leave the cats alone and come back in an hour."

Another hour passes until the Great Gobbo once again returns.

"Okay concentrate. Question one is geography. Where is the Palace of Eternal Suffering located?"

"Der Palace o Eternal Suffrin? Dats der Chaos All Stars place innit?"

"I can't help you with the answer."

"Den I ent sayin."

"Please just co-operate, this was your idea after all."

"Fair enuff."

"Okay question two is entertainment and scrying. When did the Necromancers Broadcasting Circle begin coverage of the Blood Bowl final?"

"Dis iz ard!"

"They are meant to be."

"Wen did dey start broadkastin der final? Err afta dey ad dere brekkie."

"I'm going to need a date."

"I fort yew was askin me a kweshtun not askin me owt!"

"It was Blood Bowl X."

"I wuz gunna say dat befoar yer made yer romantik advances on me!"

"Moving on, question three, history."

"Gizza a kweshtun abowt gobbos!"

"Err I'll try, okay this one isn't technically about a Goblin but here goes. Who discovered the ancient tome of Nuffle itself?"

"MUNK! MUNK! I KNOWS DAT WUN! Ee ad just wun der bogey flikkin contest wiv iz famus over under move!"

"CORRECT! Wow well done, I didn't think you would get that."

"Kummon, everry Gobbo oo knows abowt bogey flikkin knows abowt Munk!"

"I'm sure they do. Now do you get the idea of how a Blood Bowl/Fumbbl edition of Trivial Pursuit would work?"

"Yeah! An der Gobbo version! Wot do yer rekkon ter tryin a few kweshtun kards owt durin der Fumbbl Cup ter generate sum sales?"

"You know this might actually work."

"Rite i iz off ter do sum research ter find owt sum juicy gossip abowt Fumbblers I kan use in me kweshtuns."

"Err I think I will also produce some question cards just in case it looks like we are going to get sued."

Right there you go, keep an eye out during the Fumbbl Cup for a forum thread containing some example cards of a Fumbbl/Blood Bowl Trivial pursuit game which we be able to purchase in time for Christmas!*

*Which Christmas still yet to be determined but I wouldn't hold your breath!