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2011-03-08 14:26:06
36 votes, rating 5.7
36 votes, rating 5.7
The problem with dorfs
The scene opens up in the offices of Real Sociedead.
The assistant enters holding the magical up-to-the-minute-updates team sheets for Real and Fulham, shaking his head as he peruses them.
Assis.: This is bad.
Sera: What is?
Assis.: We’re 50 points better than Fulham.
Sera: That sounds good to me.
Assis.: No. It means we’re giving away two handicaps.
Sera: Two what now?
Assis.: Two handicaps, to even the game?
Sera.: I don’t understand?
Assis.: To even the game out we have to give away handicaps.
Sera: O...K... you mean like in Golf?
Assis.: Sort of...
Sera: So do we have to start 1 TD down then?
Assis.: Not quite. These handicaps are more like getting our players wrongly arrested, bribing the referee or knee capping a few of our guys.
Sera: That seems extreme.
Assis.: It’s a tough sport.
Sera: Not so tough that a team is allowed an advantage of course.
Assis.: No, not that tough, that would be unfair.
Sera: Unfair as in playing a team of 15 av9 dorfs all with guard and supported by some crazy stake wielding whore whilst still giving away two handicaps?
Assis.: No, that’s considered fair.
Sera: What a strange game we play.
Assis.: Wait until we go to LRB6, it gets much weirder then...
Sera: *shudder*
Assis.: Still could be worse, they could be dirty cheating bastid dorfs.
Sera: True.
Assis.: ...
Sera: ...
Assis.: Uh-oh!
Sera: What?
Assis.: They just fired an assistant coach!
Sera: And?
Assis.: Now we’re 51 points better!
Sera: Still. Hardly seems a justifiable reason to fire someone in this current economic climate.
Assis.: You don’t get it, now they get 3 handicaps!
Sera: What the... ... What can we do to stop this madness?
Assis.: Drop 10000 gold! That’ll make our team weaker!
Sera: That makes no sense! If anything it should makes us stronger! Poor Mikel won’t be nearly as tired for having to lug all that gold about!
Assis.: Shall I drop the cash?
Sera: *sigh* Fine.
Assis.: Done.
Sera: Good.
Assis.: Phew.
Sera: Stupid.
Assis.: Uh-oh!
Sera: Now what?
Assis.: They’ve just thrown their cash away too!
Sera: Oh, for **** sake!
Assis.: We could fire a zombie?
Sera: Where will the madness end? With us playing in the BB Sevens League?! Let’s just play them already!
[Real Sociedead 1 - 1 Fulham Titans]
The assistant enters holding the magical up-to-the-minute-updates team sheets for Real and Fulham, shaking his head as he peruses them.
Assis.: This is bad.
Sera: What is?
Assis.: We’re 50 points better than Fulham.
Sera: That sounds good to me.
Assis.: No. It means we’re giving away two handicaps.
Sera: Two what now?
Assis.: Two handicaps, to even the game?
Sera.: I don’t understand?
Assis.: To even the game out we have to give away handicaps.
Sera: O...K... you mean like in Golf?
Assis.: Sort of...
Sera: So do we have to start 1 TD down then?
Assis.: Not quite. These handicaps are more like getting our players wrongly arrested, bribing the referee or knee capping a few of our guys.
Sera: That seems extreme.
Assis.: It’s a tough sport.
Sera: Not so tough that a team is allowed an advantage of course.
Assis.: No, not that tough, that would be unfair.
Sera: Unfair as in playing a team of 15 av9 dorfs all with guard and supported by some crazy stake wielding whore whilst still giving away two handicaps?
Assis.: No, that’s considered fair.
Sera: What a strange game we play.
Assis.: Wait until we go to LRB6, it gets much weirder then...
Sera: *shudder*
Assis.: Still could be worse, they could be dirty cheating bastid dorfs.
Sera: True.
Assis.: ...
Sera: ...
Assis.: Uh-oh!
Sera: What?
Assis.: They just fired an assistant coach!
Sera: And?
Assis.: Now we’re 51 points better!
Sera: Still. Hardly seems a justifiable reason to fire someone in this current economic climate.
Assis.: You don’t get it, now they get 3 handicaps!
Sera: What the... ... What can we do to stop this madness?
Assis.: Drop 10000 gold! That’ll make our team weaker!
Sera: That makes no sense! If anything it should makes us stronger! Poor Mikel won’t be nearly as tired for having to lug all that gold about!
Assis.: Shall I drop the cash?
Sera: *sigh* Fine.
Assis.: Done.
Sera: Good.
Assis.: Phew.
Sera: Stupid.
Assis.: Uh-oh!
Sera: Now what?
Assis.: They’ve just thrown their cash away too!
Sera: Oh, for **** sake!
Assis.: We could fire a zombie?
Sera: Where will the madness end? With us playing in the BB Sevens League?! Let’s just play them already!
[Real Sociedead 1 - 1 Fulham Titans]
Comments
Posted by Garion on 2011-03-08 15:29:22
Lol funny stuff, best one yet :)
Posted by DonTomaso on 2011-03-08 16:26:42
It's a tricky game, indeed!
Posted by Arktoris on 2011-03-08 22:37:59
haha, i love how the assistant coach mentions shedding gold and firing a zombie when firing him would be the better decision : )