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2011-02-28 20:44:52
41 votes, rating 4
41 votes, rating 4
How to win at Blood Bowl: 3 Steps
A winner is a loser who sucks at losing. (words of wisdom to live by)
the 3 Steps
1)Allways compete with weaker opponeets.
TV Min/Max like a fiend, allways challenge noob coaches or rely on the CR construct and only play sub 144 CR coaches.
Allways play with dwarfs vs zons.
NEVER EVER take on your equal in skill level or play with a non orc/dorf/cd/De team. Dont do it.
2) Hang out with losers
You usually have to join a league for this...pick a league that is theamed around a problem with blood bowl. Like a league of coaches who hate fouling...Well you side with them on the injustces of fouling. You agree with their skewed view of the universe, get along with them and be part of the group. As you play your league games sometimes they will say you foul to much and such, you know go against the spirit of the league. But you tell them you do need to foul sometimes to win and they will agree and bitch but no harm will come from it. So you end up dominatiing the league and they think you are a really cool coach and man you win a lot.
3)Redefine Success
Well not every one can win majors and league titles, SMACKS and minors are pointless but they do give you a nice tag on your profile to champion your winning ways. But not all of us can do that or care to do that. So invent the new standard of winnning on the site.
Who cares if you won the match....I killed 5 of your players, does it feel like you won?
Or join a meta league that is only concerned about winning the match or playing with sub par races. Well I just beat you down man 6-0 and I laugh at your newb ways. SO what if you diced me and killed 3 of my players. My superior skill as a coach and understanding of the TV system means you gave me an advantage in my next match....Muhhhaaahhhaaa...
Dont be constrained by the norms of the site. Make your own norms and blog and forum post so much that you gain a following of like minded fanatics...in time your form of Winning will become the norm.
Follow these 3 easy steps and you to will be a winner.
the 3 Steps
1)Allways compete with weaker opponeets.
TV Min/Max like a fiend, allways challenge noob coaches or rely on the CR construct and only play sub 144 CR coaches.
Allways play with dwarfs vs zons.
NEVER EVER take on your equal in skill level or play with a non orc/dorf/cd/De team. Dont do it.
2) Hang out with losers
You usually have to join a league for this...pick a league that is theamed around a problem with blood bowl. Like a league of coaches who hate fouling...Well you side with them on the injustces of fouling. You agree with their skewed view of the universe, get along with them and be part of the group. As you play your league games sometimes they will say you foul to much and such, you know go against the spirit of the league. But you tell them you do need to foul sometimes to win and they will agree and bitch but no harm will come from it. So you end up dominatiing the league and they think you are a really cool coach and man you win a lot.
3)Redefine Success
Well not every one can win majors and league titles, SMACKS and minors are pointless but they do give you a nice tag on your profile to champion your winning ways. But not all of us can do that or care to do that. So invent the new standard of winnning on the site.
Who cares if you won the match....I killed 5 of your players, does it feel like you won?
Or join a meta league that is only concerned about winning the match or playing with sub par races. Well I just beat you down man 6-0 and I laugh at your newb ways. SO what if you diced me and killed 3 of my players. My superior skill as a coach and understanding of the TV system means you gave me an advantage in my next match....Muhhhaaahhhaaa...
Dont be constrained by the norms of the site. Make your own norms and blog and forum post so much that you gain a following of like minded fanatics...in time your form of Winning will become the norm.
Follow these 3 easy steps and you to will be a winner.
Comments
Posted by Jeffro on 2011-02-28 21:55:54
Winning FTW!
Posted by Cavetroll on 2011-02-28 22:07:07
When are you starting that league for people who think like you?
Posted by Cavetroll on 2011-02-28 22:08:10
Btw, I love the Altdorf Hammers storyline. Keep 'em coming.
Posted by PurpleChest on 2011-03-01 02:31:15
i can't tell who you're angry with, you need to be less oblique dude.
Posted by Arktoris on 2011-03-01 04:21:09
rant against the NWL?
Posted by PainState on 2011-03-01 04:42:49
Iam not angry or mad at the universe....LRB6 has not got me down...the NWL is rolling along just fine.
This was just one of my numerous oblique sense of humor blogs that for some reason seems to stir up the community.
This was just one of my numerous oblique sense of humor blogs that for some reason seems to stir up the community.
Posted by Catalyst32 on 2011-03-01 05:20:01
some of those examples sound like a GREAT way to destroy the Black Box Division... funny how Ranked kicked back up after a few tools started following your "advice" in the Box.
Posted by fabik on 2011-03-01 07:27:49
Hehe, a lot of truth here
Posted by Royston on 2011-03-01 09:05:23
You sir are my new guru.
I shall chant your name and ding tiny mini cymbals every time I play BloodBowl.
I shall chant your name and ding tiny mini cymbals every time I play BloodBowl.
Posted by Calcium on 2011-03-01 12:53:53
flame on
Posted by spiro on 2011-03-01 14:30:59
hehe i think here is no way to speak seriously about important things, only jocking, because at any other side you would be called as a whiner, complainer, pessimist, etc... In a communism time, people whose doesn't agreed with the system, have created the cabarets and comedian groups and mocked system with some jocks. Other ways have been punished and branded. Oviously i don't comparing these two things, only jocking. ; ]
I must say, that most of my matches in BOX was fun, even if i have had terrible dice, but obviously from time to time i'm playing vs min/max fanatics like chaos pact with 3 Pilling ons, 6 MB, Dirty player and crazy elf and those guys always playing vs weaker teams, except dorfs. It's even worse than cherrypicking has been ever.
I must say, that most of my matches in BOX was fun, even if i have had terrible dice, but obviously from time to time i'm playing vs min/max fanatics like chaos pact with 3 Pilling ons, 6 MB, Dirty player and crazy elf and those guys always playing vs weaker teams, except dorfs. It's even worse than cherrypicking has been ever.
Posted by Arktoris on 2011-03-01 20:18:10
Catalyst32,
Ranked picked up not because somebody's "destroying" box. Ranked picked up, because people began to realize it's just retarded to sit there for 15-60 minutes hoping the box will grant you an opponent when you could just post on gamefinder and get something sooner.
Can't find a game in ranked, activate in the box. Can't get an opponent in box, 'activate" on gamefinder in ranked.
Ranked picked up not because somebody's "destroying" box. Ranked picked up, because people began to realize it's just retarded to sit there for 15-60 minutes hoping the box will grant you an opponent when you could just post on gamefinder and get something sooner.
Can't find a game in ranked, activate in the box. Can't get an opponent in box, 'activate" on gamefinder in ranked.
Posted by Catalyst32 on 2011-03-02 04:25:40
Tomato, Tomato
Posted by Manbush on 2011-03-05 15:39:23
Maddox is my hero! LMAO